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closure and moving on the wiser


annio
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Reading posts here at gsc has helped greatly in processing things and in discerning the good from the bad and the ugly in the way organization. And I wrote the following:

Well, am feeling as if I never had closure, never got to really say good-bye to a dear friend, the twi-with-a-lot-of-good that I got involved with in '74... And yes, am also saying good-bye to a dream, naive as it was, that a human organization or leader or Bible interpretation, could actually be a "rock of certainty in the ocean of uncertainty..." Guess it is time to do another round of mourning and letting go...

And I want to keep moving ahead "fool-proofing" my life, and testing the spiritual waters for what I can believe and trust; which I think more and more is a still-alive-Jesus, Scripture minus any dogmatic closed system of interpretation, and ppl who pass character tests. (And I will continue recovering from trauma that occurred before, during, and after the way- a profitable [ad]venture.)

Re: the idealistic dreams for finding rock-solid certainty and perfection on this inhabited earth... they are not for this Life, me thinks, but rather the Next. Duh!! And YAY!!

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Well done, annio.  It takes years to disentangle properly from TWI doctrine and practices.  But examine everything; keep what is good  You said elsewhere you're going to a church; ask them if you have doctrinal concerns, and you don't have to accept their answer!  They might be right, might be wrong, but it's another point of view that you can consider.  Sit back and see what your church does, and how they treat each other and outsiders.  Are they kind and welcoming, or legalistic (you can easily spot that one!). 

For example, for a while, I would deliberately go to church late (because in TWI 10 mins early is "late") -  I was always welcomed kindly, given the notice sheet, and found a seat.  Not one word about being late.  I was in a housegroup and they were all mature Christians; I'd challenge their views (because they weren't like TWI doctrine) - they put up with me patiently despite (as a friend told me later) them thinking I had some very odd ideas and was a bit weird. I undertook a one-year course at a local Bible college (one evening a week) to find out "mainstream" views, and found a variety of views from the guest teachers, some of whom were excellent, one showed himself to be a bully (he wasn't invited back) - by this time I had the courage to discuss one idea with my church leaders and they thought it was very strange too.

There is a wide variety of views in the Christian community but God will lead you to a place that is best for you, now; later, another place might be more appropriate for where you are on your journey.  That's fine.

You didn't say how long you'd been in or how old you are now; if raised as a child for more than a couple of years, there'll be a lot you need to work through.  Take your time. 

Whatever you do, wherever you find yourself, live kindly and with compassion.  Seek others who live kindly and compassionately.  Be kind to yourself.

Oh, and read Bibles other than KJV.  Too loaded.  I found The Message (wildly different!) a good way to start reading again.  Made me think and not gloss over or jump into TWI thinking patterns.  There are threads here about different Bible versions, and why people who still read Bibles read the versions they do.

Blessings!  :wave:

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Then I went down to the potter's house, and, behold, he wrought a work on the wheels. And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it.

Faith in God and Jesus Christ is the Way to go, annio, and your personal realization of that is real and profound. Savor it. Own it! It's yours. 

Sometimes the work we need to do most is to remove the barriers we and others put up that obscure the path we're to follow, the Way of Jesus Christ our Savior. The good news is that God draws us all to Himself through Christ. The change you seek can only be good. 

I heard something last week that's stuck with me and I'll share it with you - it was the statement that "to believe in Jesus Christ is to believe that you're forgiven"....that the fundamental foundational thing that God wants us to do is to come to Christ and know that forgiveness, His grace and mercy, that finally we are at peace with Him by doing nothing more than accepting the peace He offers directly to us. I've been thinking about that this week when I pray and it feels...."good". Really good. 

All the best to you - there's a song by a band named Dawes, titled "A Little Bit of Everything" and the final verse captures another idea I'd share with you and that is to enjoy the life God has given you! Every bit of it, to it's fullest. I believe we witness to God's magnificence as Creator when we make everything we can of the life he's given us. Peace!

"All these psychics and these doctors
They're all right and they're all wrong.
It's like trying to make out every word
When they should simply hum along.
It's not some message written in the dark
Or some truth that no one's seen
It's just a little bit of everything."

(Taylor Goldsmith)

 
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Oh, I see elsewhere you said 14 years in TWI and 18 years with Geer.  That's a lot of baggage.  You won't unpack it all at once, but you'll do it much quicker here than on your own.  We know what you've been through, and you can "vent" here.

It is wonderful to enjoy the peace that passes understanding, and to learn to be quiet with the Lord and just enjoy his company.  You don't have to do, you just have to be.  The Lord welcomes you with open arms.  He promises you freedom.  He paid the price for your freedom.  Enjoy a walk in the park with him.  Or a beer in the pub. :beer:

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