jrglade

Thanks skyrider. As I peruse different stories, read Leaving the Way and Undertow, I feel very lucky that my involvement was comparatively superficial before I got out. I had just returned from my WOW year and was heading to the Way Corps myself. I had been involved in twi, in a significant way, for about 3 and a half years at that point, and after reading various accounts, it seems that the real abuse (all varieties) and oppression occurred to folks in the Corps and at HQ--those of us out in the world just went to our day jobs, and twig and witnessed, blissfully unaware of the hardships and problems at HQ--and of course we would not have known about the research discrepancies by the research department since that was covered up. Coming in from WOW to the ROA 1982, I was chosen by my branch leader to go on stage during an evening meeting in the big top with two other WOWs to do an interpretation or prophecy, depending on what VPW requested--like we would do at a twig meeting--but in front of all those people. After the meeting, I was approached by my prior Limb leader and other Corps members about how exciting it was to be chosen to do this, based on my loyalty, yada yada. Three days later, I was in the deprogramming, and left twi before joining the Corps, which I was scheduled to start the following month. I now feel like I dodged a bullet, and while the whole experience was very difficult for me in its own way, it really paled in comparison to some of the stories I have been reading about. I am grateful for the deprogramming, as I am not sure I would have left on my own, but who knows, seems like that is right around the time VPW stepped down and things really started hitting the fan--perhaps I would have joined the many who left after seeing all of the problems. At any rate, thank you again for sharing your story.

I am sure that nun's wading pool area is what I am thinking about. That is what I couldn't recall, if it was a maze, or just nicely landscaped. I was deep into twi at the time and was only at that location once--perhaps, looking back now, I just "felt" like I was lost in a maze...... And your signature---eiubmard…redrum…eiubmard…redrum-- HILARIOUS!- Thank you so much for responding!

Hello all Sandra Brown had been in one of the early Corp, I want to say 5, 6, 7 something like that, I think She was stationed in Lansing Michigan and ran a Way Home that I lived in 1979-81 and she "sheparded" me from PFAL on. She also hooked up with a guy named Paul Peoples, and I THINK they got married at some point, and he enlisted in the Corps, but I had gone WOW and lost track. Does anyone know what happened to these two?

Here is another one I am trying to recall. I think there was a hedge maze on the grounds of the Rome City location, but I am uncertain. Perhaps I am confusing this with The Shining.........a different horror experience. I went to Rome City only once, to take the advanced class (the original one) in 1980--looooong time ago Trying to recall fact from fiction in my mind-- Anyone remember this?

Also, I presume that strip bark is a lot cheaper than lumber........just sayin'

Skyrider, Just now reading this wonderful thread. I was searching the site for "deprograming" and found your story. I was also deprogrammed, but it was considered "voluntary" in that I was free to go at any time and it took place at my parent's house--so it was more of an intervention, I guess. A prior TWI member who is now a minister and handled talking about the inaccuracies of PFAL, a former TWI member who had recently left the way, and a counselor type person. I recall the exact moment when it hit me that twi is a cult--Lifton's book was on the dining room table and was open to the 8 steps of brainwashing. I happened to walk by during a break, and read the one that described "Loaded Language" ---a light bulb went off and I was out. I ended up spending 5 weeks at the half way house in Iowa City that you described. Question: when you realized that it was time to leave, I see that it was due to the then current events. I was wondering if part of how you got to that point had to do with what you were told during your deprogramming, or did the discussion during the deprograming have no effect? Thank you so much for sharing your story.

House of his Healing Presence! Yes, that's it! Thank you! As an aside, I read Losing the Way a couple of years ago, and recently Undertow. Prompted me to come back to this site and learn more. So glad GSC is still active, its really a goldmine of information and so helpful. It has been about 40 years since I left, give or take, but I still find myself thinking back and I really appreciate that this site, and you all, are here and active.

Hello all. I left in the Fall of 1982 just after the ROA. Just read Undertow and it brought back a lot of memories. I am racking my brain trying to remember what they called that little cabin in the woods that members could go to during the Rock to quietly meditate and “SIT.” Does anyone remember this? Thanks in advance.

Just saw this, read the first chapter and bought the book. Really intrigued to read it. I was in for about 4 years only, and got out right after ROA 1982. So your account should bring back memories as I was in when you were. Thanks for sharing your story.

Speaking of 7th grade, vanilla, drivel and boredom, have you seen the twi website lately? Its all cartoons and looks like it is geared toward children...........um......uh,oh.......

Can't help but notice that papertrained hasn't responded since his first post. Hope he finds the answer he is looking for......

Agree with the above, except that I don't mind 'splainin' myself, since that is what I like about Forums at any site. People discussing whatever post they want to discuss. If the originator of this post really wants to know the answer to his or her question, sounds like the answer is complicated, like each person here is complicated and like Life is complicated. If the originator of this post wants a quick and easy answer, then maybe he or she is not fully "out" of the cult mindset, yes? If the originator of this post is just trolling and attacking, then hell with him/her.....

I can't speak for everyone else, but this is such a timely question for me--I have been wondering the same thing about myself. I got out in 1981, almost 30 years ago. I had a rough recovery period, lots of therapy, and have done very very well for myself since them. A couple of years ago, I found this site and spent a little time reviewing the various documents, and other pieces of information. So much happened in twi after I left and I found it fascinating. I got really turned off to this site at that time (no offense to anyone here) because I happened on a thread with a lot of bickering and debating about what the "Word" said about some topic. It kind of gave me the chills, because it had the same tenor as The Way when it challenged and debated the "Word" by citing scripture, etc. It felt to me like at least those particular posters had not gotten "out" completely as they had the same cult personality they developed in twi. Again, no offense intended at all, it was just my reaction. I am now back after a couple of years, with a new fascination as to why I joined twi, and I am asking myself What am I Doing Here?? The same question as the original post. I can't get my head around it, I just know that I want to read and read and read, not at all about spiritual matters, but about twi itself and how I got sucked in to begin with, I guess. I am still trying to understand how it happened? I am not sure what this is about, but I can tell you that I have worked hard in my recovery over many years, and perhaps this is the next step--previously I focused on learning about reality, decision making, self esteem, confidence, repairing my career and finding a whole new life. I spent several of those years not thinking twice about twi and simply living my life. Now, perhaps, after accomplishing these things, I am ready to come face to face with your question, at long last. I found K.S.'s Losing the Way to be compelling and very helpful. Thank you for that, K.S. My 2 cents.

Thanks for your responses y'all---I just re-read my post-- kinda heavy -- sorry about that. I just don't understand why I am so engrossed in my Way Days (daze) all of a sudden after all this time, and here I am yacking like I just escaped. Thank you for your patience and tolerance.....

Thanks Groucho. I joined awhile ago, forgot about it. Then like I said, the Jonestown thing got me thinking, so now I am back. Its hard. I thought it was all behind me long ago, but still, I am working through trying to figure it all out, I guess. It helps to post, no doubt

THANKS

I will apologize in advance and hope that no-one takes this too personally, but honestly, all the back and forth on the hundreds of posts about what "the word" says and what Jesus meant, and that forgiveness is serious stuff, and this is punctuated, and that is work not fruit, and ya-da-ya-da-ya-da is really giving me the creeps. To me, its all that doctrine-jargon-rationalization-making the Bible say what you want it to say, that was the essence of TWI. I understand that many of you hold on to the Bible and its study even after the Way experience, and I really do respect that--its just that all of this combat using chapter and verse and parables and such just strikes me as a bunch of same ol', same ol' nonsense. Personally, I don't really care what the Bible says. And then for people to actually get worked up about what another person promotes as the true meaning of "God's Word"---well, first, the moment anyone goes forth confidently declaring that their interpretation is the right one, well, they lose credibility, completely, in my eyes--that's the same ego-maniacal .... propelled by VPW==I have no use for it. Who REALLY knows what it ALL means? NO ONE, and to me, that is the question and answer that saves us, after all. Second, to respond defensively and fight back with scripture of his or her own, that strikes me as continuing on with the same Way personality that many members developed (ie, I always felt that twi was aggressive in its teaching and promotion of its doctrine). So it gives me the creeps, and I sense that some posters have not shed the indoctrination (whether it be the information we received or the behavioral expectations imposed upon us). The tone of this board feels like a bunch of twi members witnessing to each other, just like we used to witness to others when we were fully "in" the group. Or maybe I am misinterpreting and just feeling jumpy with all the wayspeak in this thread, who knows--that is quite possible. As for forgiveness, I am still working on forgiving myself for being so easily duped and manipulated--and I have been out since 1981! Rapists, con artists and sociopaths can be found everywhere on this planet--that is nothing new and just because they surfaced in twi doesn't make them any more or less evil than the rapists, sociopaths and con artists in other venues--they all prey on our vulnerabilities. I still can't wrap my head around why I fell for it--I am not being hard on myself, I am just unable to grasp it quite yet. I am angered by twi, and as I read more about what others went through, I become disgusted and feel a little scared, in that those experiences could have happened to me. I feel horrible for the folks in the WACO disaster, and feel more empathy than the average person because that could have been me--as the 30 year anniversary of Jonestown has come and gone this year, I have felt real dread and grief for those people and those poor little children, mainly because that could have been me. If you listen to the Jonestown "death tape" (Jones and his people during the poisoning--widely available on the internet) be prepared to hear a horrific experience that goes without saying, but also, you will hear members stand up and refer to Jones, and their group and their cause with similar phrases, devotion and cult speak that we used to use or hear at ROA or other similar events. Now THAT is creepy! Mostly, I feel very grateful that I got out without inordinate harm--I know others were not so lucky as I, but that is not to say I was not harmed--I definitely was harmed--twi took my mind away from me---that creeps me out the most. Just my .02 -- consider it for what it is worth to you

Its interesting to hear the different ways of leaving. I left a week after the ROA in 1981--I had just finished WOW and was on my way to Way Corps--My family hired a deprogrammer (an ex-member of TWI who claimed to be a minister) along with a recently deprogrammed twi ex-member) It was all very emotional, but I was not kidnapped--I was free to leave at any time, and at one point almost did. I actually left the house for a walk, and something inside me kept me from making a phone call to my "innie" friends at the time. I picked up the reciever on a pay phone, then just hung it up and walked back to my family's home. I am sure they were very nervous. The minister kept discussing the biblical inconsistencies, the ex-member just tried to be supportive, but what really got me out was during a break, I was thumbing through the Lifton chapter that listed the 8 characteristics of a cult. When I read the one about Loaded Language, I had an "aha" moment of realization, and that was about it. We continued to talk, but I was much more agreeable and cooperative. I went to a halfway house geared just for people like me who had gone thru deprogramming. There were people from different groups who worked there or who were clients like me--moonies, krishna and twi mostly. I spent about a month there--basically it was a place to hang out and talk. For awhile, I accompanied deprogrammers as the "ex-member" peer person. That was interesting, and risky, as I find out later. I also did some presentations in the community to people with family members in a group. That was VERY EXHAUSTING, as these worried people were very demanding. I remember on one deprogramming experience, one of the deprogrammer's sidekicks exposed himself to me. NICE........I also remember freaking out when I went back to my WOW location to tell my friends there (non members) that I was out of the group, and I was approached by a MOONIE in my old WOW town. THAT got me wondering if the devil was after me, let me tell you. It was a wild time---not easy--I don't know if I would have walked out on my own or not--when I left, Wierwille was still fully in charge and Martindale was considered very entertaining--it was before the whole break up started happening. I am glad this site is here. With the 30 year anniversary of Jonestown this last Nov, I have been putting a lot of thought into my past lately.

Just wanted to know--is GSC radio still broadcasting, and if so, how do I tune in? (when where etc) I live in the Chicago area THANKS

Took PFAL in 1978 Barely finished college, graduated in 81 just in time to go WOW Went to ROA at end of WOW year in 1982 and was deprogrammed ( ) on the break between ROA and joining the Corps So, about 4 years Hard to believe its been 25 years.......

Year2027: How long have you been out of TWI?

I took some training in Gestalt therapy a long time ago (post-twi)--this theory interprets dreams by suggesting that we all dream all the time--it is our mind trying to sort through our day or our issues and file them all away. When you dream but don't remember your dreams, it means you have successfully filed away the issues you dreamed about--all resolved. The dreams you remember consist of issues you have that have not been filed away, or resolved. Given that, the next step is to analyze the specifics of the dream. Each part of the dream is a part of you. So, after dreaming about a park with kids, you say to yourself "I am the child on the merry go round. I am fun, innocent, I don't think of anything but having fun" then, "I am the merry go round, I go around in circles, I am colorful, I have safety rails, kids like me" and "I am the pond in the park, I am fluid, ducks float on me, fish live in me, I am pretty to look at, I make people feel serene" or "I am the duck floating on the lake, I float, I dive, I fly south for the winter, I run for the hills when people come near me" etc, etc. Each part of the dream is a part of your personality, and ideally, processing the dream helps you integrate your parts to resolve the issues presenting you at the time. Its a theory What it says about Joseph, well, that's pretty hard to say.......