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Do You Tell People You Used To Be In A Cult?


The Girl From Oz
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It doesn't come up much since I've been out for over 15 years and it doesn't ha very little to do with my present life.

Once, around ten years ago when my daughter was little and I was in a "play group" of mothers that met weekly at playgrounds to let their kids play, we had one of our mother's night's out. We were sitting around a pool drinking wine and I let it out that I was in a "cult" or something. I don't recall what I said exactly, but the result was positive. The reaction was like, wow, I never knew that about you, and how much do we all know about one another really and it led to more sharing on the part of all of us regarding what we'd been into.

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quote:
Originally posted by outandabout:

It doesn't come up much since I've been out for over 15 years and it has very little to do with my present life.

Once, around ten years ago when my daughter was little and I was in a "play group" of mothers that met weekly at playgrounds to let their kids play, we had one of our mother's night's out. We were sitting around a pool drinking wine and I let it out that I was in a "cult" or something. I don't recall what I said exactly, but the result was positive. The reaction was like, wow, I never knew that about you, and how much do we all know about one another really and it led to more sharing on the part of all of us regarding what we'd been into.


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The Girl From Oz:

"Once you have left the TWI, have you told people about your expeience? When people ask you about yourself, do you mention that you used to be in a cult? Do you think it defines who you are/were as a person? Or not?"

I have told people that I have ran home-based Bible-study fellowships for many years. That I perform weddings and funerals, that I am a Pentacostal Fundamentalist Unitarian. Beyond that I dont think that anyone really cares about what group I was a "follower together with".

For many years when I have been introduced to Christains, it has gone something like: "This is ET1 Young, he is the Lay-Leader and runs all Protestant services on-board." At which point some might ask what church you belong to, but more often than not they want to explain what church THEY belong to.

Now the Homeschool group we meet with, meets in a Baptist church. They each have had long journeys in coming to their current faith and only share their pasts when it is vital to the ministry.

The Homeschool curriculum we use is Ana-Baptist, so it is seen and 'presumed' to be far more Fundamentalist then anyone else. (By the way, Ana-Baptist is the phrase for what others call: Mennonite).

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  • 2 years later...

I thought this topic was interesting in leui of some of my findings.

My ex mother in laws father was in an occult..probaly in the 40's (If you look at a dollar bill, there is a triangle with an eye in it, it was the Cult sign that her father was involved in.)

My ex husband's current girlfriend's ex husband was in an occult.

My daughter's husbands father was in an occult.

THese were all very high level people in the business world..

So you never know..these folks I know dont hide it, but im sure its not on thier most popular topic's list.

Are the Masons an occult, if so my exfather in law was in one too!!

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I think cult is a very wide term for many organiztions people can get involved in .

If one asks if I participated in the way internationals fellowships or its spin -offs I would gladly say a very loud YES!

My son as a teen was approached on the street by a guy who told hime all about the way being a cult .. he came home and asked me about I gave him my own personal spin.

I have no problem with that , what I do have problems with is controversy over scripture and what it means.

I shun discussion of what the bible may say or not if I feel it will end in discord or strife or hurt feelings .

If someone is into the trinity I may say I do not believe Jesus is God, but leave it at that and continue listening to their ideals .

At this point most all of what I confess as truth from the bible I own in other words I personly believe and am convinced it is truth for MY life.

not a cult teaching.

but IM not one who was ever involved for the people of the cult , so it is different for everyone Im sure.

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Depends on the folks and the situation. I don't advertise it, but I don't hide it either.

I know that having talked about my involvement has given people relief and allowed me to be in a position to help so many people. One girl at a party, when she heard that I had been in a cult, pulled me into a corner to ask some questions and we ended up standing outside for a few hours while she talked to me about sexual abuse that she had been subjected to from her own mother, who was a leader in a similar type group. I was able to give her words of encouragement and comfort even though it was only the first time we had ever met. It was truly humbling that she felt comfortable enough with me to share something so personal, private and scary with me.

All the folks at work and in my neighborhood know. For them, it was a relief to find out that there was a reason behind the madness that they had perceived. It was even nicer for them to see me begin acting more "normal" and less paranoid, depressed and just plain "weird". :P Funny to find out what people saw, observed and thought about you once they find out that kind of stuff.

I really am thankful that my experiences and the fact that I'm so open about them have enabled me to help people in ways I never would have imgained. ^_^

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past is past Johnny but truth is also truth.

I knew many people when i was involved and I still live close by to the drama times so the odds are one of my adult kids or relatives run into another believer is likely and you know what Im not ashamed either.

I do not have anything to hide and my life really isnt so powerful I can put a stumbling block in anothers path.. I trust my own judgement and I trust God and I am accountable to many.

If God has brought a person into my life and they want to ask me anything Im an open book and I can walk without guilt or shame if they have a problem with that it doesnt belong to me.

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so the odds are one of my adult kids or relatives run into another believer is likely and you know what Im not ashamed either

Pond, you just described running into another Ex TWI-er. I have no problem with that either. But if I meet someone who knows nothing about TWI, I see no reason to divulge it. How many times a s a Way person did a "perfectly good discussion" about God's Word get interrupted when the Trinity came up? And, were that person then to go and google The Way, then that person may begin to doubt any encouragement or counseling I may have given them. And, you may consider yourself not "powerful enough" to cause someone to stumble, but since both God and Jesus have told us via the scriptures that are not to place stumbling blocks in any one's path, then I guess it must be possible to do so.

Case in point, I have been sharing the gospel of our lord Jesus Christ with a friend, a woman, who has been going through some very very troubling times. I mentioned her on the "Jon Benet" thread. I have been sharing with her about the love of God in Christ Jesus, and how Jesus Christ died for our sins, and how he was raised from the dead. I have talked with her about God's gift of holy spirit, and about being born again, and about how God does not "heap troubles" upon us to test our faith. And, she has received it wonderfully. BUT, I have made sure never to mention The Way Ministry, but I just know she would google it, and then I would have to spend oodles of time explaining things that I'd just rather not get into. And I believe THAT would interrupt any progress she has been making. I won't even send her off to a "splinter" group, for, I just want her to hear and believe the simple things of God that I have been sharing with her...

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Only if I'm counseling someone to get out of a cult. And it's happened a couple of times.

I've also been known to give myself away by quoting scripture during discussions and getting ridiculously high scores on Jeopardy Religion categories :)

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John

If a person can find out in the manner you describe they can find out your past. I do not deny it i do not neccesarioy bring it up but if somone metions it i do say I wasinvolved again I feel no shame from being involved. not just believers this is a city and i was have been around for forty years bound to happen si I do not sweat it.

Your witness is one thing a stumbling block is such if they only eat vegtables and you allow meat..etc. do not make them eat meat or say it is Gods will. that is a stumbling block.

Early christians involved other religons in their beliefs on how to worship God and over trival religous matters such as food God says do not stop them from enjoying their service or worship.

but your past is quite a different story, by your theory the Apostle Paul would have never spoken a word. or serve the Saviour.

he killed christians and they feared for their life from him. for good reason.

His past was one he couldnt run away from and it didnt bother him, nor did it hinder his ministry in any manner.

Edited by pond
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My boyfriend is the first person I ever said the words "I was in a cult" to. He was wonderfully understanding (which I thought he'd be) and very accepting. It was too big a part of my life not to mention and since I didn't want to lie to him, I told him about my experiences. He's even been on Greasespot a few times and read some of the stories here.

He came with me to last year's Weenie Roast and had a great time. He enjoys healthy debate and discussion on religion and Christianity. His observation after the roast and hearing about other experiences was "I don't think you were as involved with The Way as some other people were." It's still hard for me to think about without some measure of embarrassment and shame, but I've come a long way in letting go of the past thanks to Greasespot.

I don't tell most people specifically that I was in a cult because I live in a small town, very Baptist, and I don't think they would understand. I have told a few people that I was involved with a non-denominational group for a few years. That seems to answer basic questions.

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Depends on the topic at hand... but sometimes, Yes, I tell people.

It seems to come ’out’ w/ the 'Church' topic, which is popular in our area.

Some people have questions, and I find talking about the cult experience a mixed bag... sometimes freeing, sometimes embarrassing~

Am I a victim or an idiot?!?

It’s all fading away now… and there was a time I wondered when that would EVER happen…. Ahhhh… the beautiful sounds of crickets and frogs…

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The toughest audience I ever faced when stating" I was in a cult" was myself. I was both disappointed and relieved at the same time. I was disappointed because I felt I had been duped and relieved that Some things I had felt guilt about weren't really worthy of self condemnation. As for others, I think it depends on the situation, the person asking and their motivatuion. Recently, a person who I have known for a couple of years revealed they had been in a cult at one time.(not TWI) It opened the door and we compared notes. It was enlightening on both our parts. I think we both profited. On the other hand, for someone who may be simply looking for something to hold over my head, I simply state I was involved with a bible study group. I never lie about it but l don't go into detail unless I think something positive will come out of a disclosure. Being the one bringing up the issue seems too much to me like witnessing. I don't mind sharing the word with someone who has agenuine curiousity but I hope( slap own wrist for "H" word ,lol) I never again come across like I'm forcing my beliefs on someone.

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Great topic, GirlfromOz…I would say what is partly self-defining about my involvement with TWI is a twofold after-the-fact realization. I think personal failures and successes define who we are [in terms of how we deal with both] – and so if I ever talk to someone about being in a cult – I go along the lines of two implied questions: 1. How does a normal person get duped into something like this? Answer: by turning off their critical thinking skills. 2. How does a normal person move on from something like this? The answer will vary for everyone of course – and that is the springboard for my personal testimony of deliverance.

As far as the criteria for me talking about such a revealing aspect of my life there’s a few things I keep in mind. It is not something I reveal right off the bat – I would like people to get to know me in this present context of life. Typically, I’m revealing it to another Christian if I deem it necessary in helping/inspiring them or to someone who I sense is becoming a closer friend to me.

I have had only one “bad reaction” after my revelation – but it eventually turned out okay. At a former job another Christian thought he could brow-beat me with his “right doctrine” since I had to be such a dummy for getting in TWI. Well, that lasted a couple of months [you can’t wear me down – I’m Corps dammit! LOL :biglaugh: ] – and evolved into us loaning books to each other – and leveled off into having some great heart-to-heart talks about things we all wrestle with in our Christian walk.

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I have no problem telling people that I was in a cult.

The subject rarely comes up anymore. And I would only talk about it if it was appropriate.

Some people can't handle such topics, so I am careful about the subject.

Sunnyfla.

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  • 4 months later...

It really depends on context.

Generally I tell people that I grew up in a Jesus-freak church, and we had bible study at my house several times a week. That's enough for most people, especially out here on the West coast. LOL

I tell friends if it comes up, that twi is a cult now and was going in that direction when Mom pulled us out. After that I refer to it jokingly as a cult, because it's just easier than running through the whole explanation again.

Of course the worst is when people ask why I lived in so many places as a kid. They always assume I'm an army brat. Usually I tell them Mom was a hippy doing bible study missionary work. Sometimes people I don't know very well act curious at that point, so I generally try and change the topic.

I have a lot more fun telling people that I am/was a Freemason. Secret Societies are cooler than cults, I suppose.

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