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How to insult anybody without them even knowing you did it..


Ham
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Another thread got me on this- I found myself using one of these, and graciously edited it..

How to insult people with "way" terminology, and they might even think it was a compliment.

1. You must be one of those people that go to church..

2. You remind me of one of the coordinators in the old ministry I used to be part of..

3. You are sure looking "Rosie", today..

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Well, Ham, Southerners are very adept at this. icon_smile.gif:)--> We've learned from very young children how to nicely insult people....come to think of it, maybe that's how Rosie gets away with it.....

Ma'am is southern for b*tch in some contexts

"Bless your heart" can mean "you freaking retard"

"You're from New York, aren't you?" well, that one would get me heavily censored. icon_smile.gif:)-->

"Your Mama must be real proud of you" wink2.gif;)-->

For TWI:

"Have I seen you knocking on the doors in my neighborhood?"

"You sure have a way with scripture."

"You almost make me want to look into the Wiccan beliefs."

"I'll bet you can lead songs real well, can't you?"

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Tom, "in some contexts" was the key phrase there. wink2.gif;)--> Of course you get whipped with the switch you had to go pick out for yourself if you don't say "ma'am" or "sir" to anyone older than you, but there is such a way/tone of voice of saying it so that the word can mean "b*tch" and any self-respecting southerner would know right away what you were implying. wink2.gif;)--> It's a talent that's not even taught outright, but rather so subtle that it's never even talked about until you reach the age where it's safe to tell your parents about those parties you had when they were out of town. icon_biggrin.gif:D-->

There's also a difference between a "lady" and a "woman". I've been scolded by my Grandma on more than one occasion for inappropriately referring to someone of the female persuasion as a "lady".

Templelady, you've got that right! ANYONE from above the Mason-Dixon line is definitely not allowed to be considered a "belle", much less a lady except under the most special of circumstances. icon_smile.gif:)-->

p.s. Tom, I think we should discuss that bumper sticker over a couple of snow cones. Do you make Mint Julep flavored ones?

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Tom, I think SOME people think Texas is southern wink2.gif;)-->, even though we all know its it's own country!

Some years back, when I was introduced to my future mother-in-law and I called her ma'am and Ms. When she corrected me I explained that I was southern and I was raised that those terms were polite. She got a big ole smile on her face and said "Oh, like Dallas?!" icon_biggrin.gif:D--> Of course, she's English, so she doesn't know any better, we're all Yanks to her! icon_eek.gif

gc

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quote:
Originally posted by My3Cents:

It's been said that a true gentleman never insults anyone unless he means to.

A true gentleman knows he's insulting, its the person who is being insulted that doesn't know wink2.gif;)-->

gc

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quote:
"You're from New York, aren't you?"

Actually, even tho' it would be intended as an insult, I wouldn't regard it as one, no matter where in the South I am.

I would respond to that question with a little bit of pride and "Why yes sir, I *am* from New York. A damn Yankee is what I am, so a good day to you." icon_biggrin.gif:D-->

I wonder if that can be regarded as an insult. wink2.gif;)-->

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Some of my favorites.....

"Even you should be able to grasp this ideat."

Say this one in public:

"Have I ever brought up the $100 you owe me? No! Have I ever embarrassed you over this? Have I ever said how much I needed that money? No, and I never will.

"Didn't we already have this discussion right before you went to alcohol rehab?"

"Considering your family background, it's a wonder you have come as far as you have"

"Why, that is a brilliant question, coming from you!"

"You weren't breast fed as a child, were you?"

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Funny you should bring this up.

I was praying a few days ago to see how to bless people without them knowing it.

That is, I could see so many got beat without knowing how or why (such as inheriting diseases, having a spouse someone thought was lovely turn into a bully, having stuff stolen from them).

And I always try to see the blessings that people do, even without trying to.

Kit

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Kit Sober you have a heart of pure gold and I thank God for your life and pray for great blessings for you and your family every time I think of you. icon_smile.gif:)-->

There's a certain smugness and sense of personal satisfaction when one insults someone with them having no clue that they are being insulted. The point is for them to never suspect that they were insulted or to figure it out long after you're gone. wink2.gif;)--> So, Garth, I would have insulted you in my own mind and way and if you never figured that it was an insult, well, then I succeeded. wink2.gif;)-->

The southern way is hospitality and a kind word to and for everyone, so a true southern lady would never insult someone outright - It's just not "lady like" icon_smile.gif:)--> It's hard to explain, but there's a time and a place for everything and you never insult people to their face - behind their back is okay, though.

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As a transplant to the South, I was so hurt by people's actions. I grew up in New England and if you want to insult someone you do it out in the open. Then I came down south and people would seem to be so nice, but they were just being polite and hiding behind that facade.

I would think people were truly my friends, only to learn that they hated me and said so behind my back. Very hurtful things I would not say about my worst enemy.

After years of being in the south, I picked up the game, made real friends, and learned that no one liked those people that I had originally been friends with, that they were not considered to be "ladies" and people put up with them because they were so polite. This was foreign to me cause the northerner inside me says, If I don't like you, I am not talking to you.

Belle, what you said made me laugh...my friends and I had a saying. "When you leave the room you will be talked about, might me good, might be bad, but you will be talked about just the same."

So I learned that when a southerner says...I was just talking about you...they mean it! icon_smile.gif:)-->

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AdiosMiCorazon, glad I gave you a chuckle. icon_smile.gif:)--> I don't always agree with southern ways, but I know and understand it very well having grown up in it.

I think we should be called "red ears" instead of "red necks" since everyone gets talked about. icon_biggrin.gif:D--> When friends would say they couldn't make it to a gathering, we'd make sure to remind them that they will indeed be talked about. If it's a lame excuse for missing out....no one promises that it will all be good. wink2.gif;)-->

I feel sorry for non-southerners when they move into the deep south because I know it's going to be a major culture shock. At least the food is good right away and if there are lots of weddings and funerals during your first year in the south then the transition is that much easier.

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Andrew is being taught the southern ways.

He says ma'am and sir and he addresses adults as Mr. Miss or Mrs.

He knows to help others, open doors for ladies etc. etc...treating others courteously and with respect.

I don't know about talking behind peoples backs...that's always been considered bad form and dishonorable...but then I'm originally from Texas which is southWEST (with a capital WEST), and not just south.

Now I live in the Ozarks which is a world unto itself.

Something I noticed at summer Scout camp in Oklahoma. There was a Scout troop from Brooklyn...mostly blacks, and they addressed their Scoutmaster as Mr. Eddie and they were quick to open doors for ladies and when hiking up "cardiac hill", I had to stop and catch my breath, a couple of them stopped and asked if I was okay, could they get anything, offering water and addressing me as sir.

That wasn't typical of the New Yorkers I encountered when I was up there about 15 years ago.

Just an observation.

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quote:
So, Garth, I would have insulted you in my own mind and way and if you never figured that it was an insult, well, then I succeeded.

And your gain from that would be, ..... what?

What I said was "Actually, even tho' it would be intended as an insult, I wouldn't regard it as one, no matter where in the South I am."

Perhaps I should have been more clear. I should have said, "I wouldn't have treated it as one (an insult)". Ie., I wouold have taken what was evidently an insult, and worked it to my favor.

Its like during our country's fight for independence, when the British derided the colonists as 'Yankee Doodle Dandies'; a definite put down. The colonists grabbed that term, 'Yankees', and wore that label with pride. "Yankees! King George III regard us as Yankees, and we're proud of that!". In other words, they took control of the term and turned it around.

Which is what I've done with the '(damn) Yankee' term, or 'being from New York' phrase. By the way, I am originally from upstate New York, so I guess the question "You're from New York, aren't you?" fits me especialy well.

And maybe its also because I have a "frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" attitude about the question. wink2.gif;)-->

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Awwww, Garth. It doesn't matter if you know you've been insulted, in fact, it's best that you don't. It's hard to explain having grown up in it. I suppose it's a type of defense mechanism and it's sometimes used to manipulate people. If you have no idea I'm insulting you then you'll think I'm just sweet as pie and I'll be able to catch more flies with that honey than if I were to outright insult you.

It also keeps us on even footing in my mind because I'm able to insult you in my mind, so, even if you're unaware, I keep my self-esteem.... I don't think I'm explaining it very well, though. When I moved to Orlando people thought I was stupid because I was a girl, I spoke very slowly and with a really thick southern accent. Men and NY'ers especially. icon_smile.gif:)-->

When I would ask if they were from NY, they were so proud of my ability to discern their accent or impressed that I seemed to be genuinely taking an interest in where they were from. I didn't give a .... where they were from, but it took them off the defensive and made them treat me just a little bit more nicely and I was inwardly amused at the reaction. When my parents would call to check on me, we'd spend a bit of time laughing at the stupid NY'ers and their responses to my innocent sounding question.

I suppose another example is when someone starts to explain something to a redneck like they have no idea what he's talking about when the redneck perhaps know more than he does but the redneck asks the most simple of questions and eventually the initiator catches on that he's being made a fool of because he treated the redneck like he was the fool.

Like I said, southern culture is quirky and different (and even more different from that other southern country - Texas). Maybe only southerners can "really" get it. wink2.gif;)--> But keep that "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" attitude. It's rather endearing. icon_biggrin.gif:D-->

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