Jade

detroit isnt in, so we quit watching.

we need a picture forum again. dont y'all agree?? we cant post pics, that "gallery" or whatever, doesnt work. <_< <_< <_<

its not uncommon in the latino community or heritage to not believe in birth control. some mexicans believe it its religously right to have lots and lots of children. just like i think roman cathilics? dont believe in birth control. doesnt make it right but that is thier beliefs.

my belief..... i believe i am thankful for kailin and that is all. no more kids at this point. :)

Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears.

When the Mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny's family

was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Little Johnny's

dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears.

His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the

baby's missing ears or even said the word "ears" he would get the

spanking of his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told

his dad he understood completely. When Johnny looked in the crib he said,

"What a beautiful baby." The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny."

Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a

cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see?"

"Yes", the Mother replied, "we are so thankful; the Doctor said he will

have 20/20 vision." "That's great," said Little Johnny, "cuz he'd be sh**-outta-luck if he

needed glasses."

A nun, badly needing to use to the restroom, walked into a

local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.

She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the

restroom?" The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf." "Well, in that case I'll just look the other way," said the nun. So, the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant, and she proceeded to the restroom. After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?" "Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?" "No I don't drink, but I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun. "You see," laughed the bartender, "every time the fig leaf on the statue is lifted up, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?"

8753

it is in my 5 year plan .

so ma, get a 5 year plan

i had an AWESOME time and if i coulda had kailin shipped to me i wouldnt of came back !

i am very excited and plan on having TONS of fun ! :)

IN 18 HOURS I WILL BE ON A PLANE AND ON MY VERY OWN FOR 3 DAYS. NO BABY, NO MAN, JUST ME ! I AM GOING TO ARKANSAS FOR MY BEST FRIENDS WEDDING. WE HAVE BEEN BEST FRIENDS SINCE WE WERE 4. LLLLLOOOOONNNNNGGGGGGG TIME. AND I AM IN THE WEDDING ! IT IS GONNA BE ALOT OF FUN AND I CANT WAIT ! I WILL POST PICS WHEN I GET BACK.

i am act2 ! she is beautifull and i guess im not so bad either ! ( LOL )

i am thankful cuz she is a wonderful and "easy" baby !

i dunno tom ! they beat out shaq 2 years ago ! so bring the " heat " ( lol ) we will DEFINATLY be watching and routin for them !

SINCE THERE IS NO LONGER A PICTURE FORUM ANY MORE ........ HERE ARE NEW PICS OF ME AND KAILIN. ISNT SHE GETTING SO BIG !

AND SHE IS SOOOOOO PRETTY , BUT WE ALL KNOW WHY ...... :)

what a great idea.

and so much more positive !

i also like the sunshine........... finally after 2 weeks of rain we have sun again !

WHO WAS WATCHING THE PISTONS GET RID OF THE CAVILIERS YESTERDAY ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

D E T R O I T

B A S K E T B A L L

NO one tells what they DO like....

at least i added positive things as well...

IM CONFUSED !

IT SAYS "SITTER"

I DONT UNDERSTAND

> While trying to escape through Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden found a Bottle on a beach and picked it up.

>

> Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile and said "Master, may I grant you one wish?"

>

> "You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don't you know who I am?

>

> I don't need any common woman giving me anything" barked Bin Laden.

>

> The shocked genie said "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to that bottle forever."

>

> Osama thought a moment, then grumbled about the impertinence of the woman and said "Very well, I want to awaken with three American women in my bed in the morni ng. So just do it and be off wi th you!"

>

> The annoyed genie said, "So be it !" and disappeared.

>

> The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with -

>

>

> Lorena Bobbitt,

>

> Tonya Harding,

>

> and Hillary Clinton.

>

> His penis was gone,

>

> his knees were broken,

>

> and he had no health insurance.

>

>

> God is good.

people who think they know EVRYTHING........ ( you know who you are )

fake foot bitches

liars

poopy diapers

stinky bathrooms

dirty houses

not having enuf money

people who for some un-godly reason do NOT know how to shower

the way you feel the next morn after you drank to much

cooked peas

spiders ( i don think god created these, i think it was the devil )

THINGS I DO LIKE:

i LOVE kailin jade

playing in the rain

people who are real

ice cream sundays

hugs and kisses from my daughter

mommy day cuz you get nice presents

taco salad

being loved

my house to stay clean

when i get into my vehicles and they smell yummy

having a job where i make my own hours and i am my own boss

the "idiom" isnt a michigan thing, its just a funny and mean and just plain stupid but hilarious name calling statement.

and NO it isnt on snopes................... its just made up.

out of 11 people, shellon is the only one to be called a elf tit looking son a a bitch.

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

that is funny Sh!T !!!!

very funny! i will keep this info in the back of my mind ! ;)

MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY

by samantha north

What exactly are you wearing right now?

a grey t shirt and a comfy pair of pants

What is your current problem?

it has been raining so I cant go running

What makes you most happy?

kailin jade

If you could go back in time and change something would you?

there are things i regret but everythin happens for a reason

Name something obvious about you:

i have curly hair

What's the name of the song that you're listening to?

”so what” field mob and ciara

Any celeb you would marry?

llyod banks

Name someone with the same birthday as you?

paris hilton i think ?

Do you have a crush on someone?

crush ? naw

Ever sang in front of a large audience?

yes been a long time though

What do you usually order from Starbucks?

never been to a starbucks but we have panera bread and they have GREAT frozen mochas !

Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?

I got told alycia keys a few times

Do you still watch kiddy movies or kiddie TV shows?

yah kailin likes them

Do you speak any other languages?

i know a few words in spanish

Have you ever ridden in a Hummer limo?

not yet

Has anyone you've been really close with passed away?

yes, a few

Do you ever watch MTV?

i love it

What's something that really annoys you?

fake foot people

Chapter 1:

Nicknames:

sami

Current location:

michigan

Eye color :

hazel

Chapter 2:

Do you live with your parents:

not in a looong time

Do you get along with your parents:

as long as we don’t live together me and mom are cool

Are your parents married/separated/divorced:

dad past away 9 years ago

Do you have any siblings:

yes, the best little sister in the hole world. her name is kelly and she is 10.

((((( kelly )))))

Chapter 3: Favorites

Ice cream flavor:

mint choclate chip

Season:

summer

Shampoo/conditioner:

thermasilk

Chapter 4: Do You

Sing in the shower:

sum times

write on your hand:

not since grade school. we would write “I love ………. “

Call people back:

yes !

Believe in love:

i think so (you know who you are CFW )

Sleep on a certain side of the bed:

left side

Have any bad habits:

pick my nose i hate having boogers.. have to have a clean nose

Chapter 5: Have You Ever

Broken a bone:

yes

Gotten stitches:

yes

Taken painkillers:

yes

Gone SCUBA diving:

that would be fun!

Been stung by a bee:

yes i think the one and only time was in 6th grade

Thrown up in a restaurant:

in the bathroom…. to many drinks

Sworn in front of your parents:

F#$@ yah

Had detention:

quite a few times and I had saturday school once ( do they still do that? )

Been sent to the principal's office:

yes

Been called a hoe:

just by jealous bitches

Been called a stank-foot mongoloid elf-tit lookin' sonofabitch?

not that i am aware of

Chaper 6: Who/What was the last

Person to text you?

sean

What did it say:

happy easter

Person to call you:

charlie

Person you hugged:

kailin

Person you tackled?

shellys son anthony ( he won )

Thing you ate:

pasta i made for lunch

Thing you drank:

a lot of beer last night but today diet dr. pepper

Thing you said:

”take a nap lin, i love you “

Delete my answers and fill in your own and send it .. J

Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground

and go into the woods.

Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane

in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so exciting that

he could not contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his

mother.

"Mommy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the

woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a

big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt.

Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt

Jane........"

At this point Mommy cut him off and said,

"Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the

rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when

you tell it tonight."

At the dinner table, Mommy asked little Johnny to tell his story.

Johnny started his story, "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go

into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt

Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane

helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mommy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army."

Mommy fainted!

Moral: Sometimes you need to listen to the whole story before you

interrupt.

______________________________

Lynn E. Ritter

OH MY GOD!!!

THAT IS FUNNY foot .... AND SOOO TRUE !