grand-daughter Posted July 18, 2006 Share Posted July 18, 2006 At the age of eleven I had already seen so much but it was just the beginning. I then was sent to various group homes, foster homes, and treatment centers for unruly children. If you have ever heard that these places were formed to help children, think again. Abuse runs rampant in these places. All forms all overlooked because of course we were the crazy ones. Our word wasn’t any better than all the men who said I love you now pull your pants down or of the drug dealers that say I have something that will make all of your problems go away. Let me backtrack a minute. I must say that I always loved God. I believe it stemmed from the fact that my parents in order to have it quiet during hangovers sent us kids to church. I didn’t have much knowledge but I had a great feeling that He loved me somehow when even my own mother couldn’t. I was in the eighth grade and in probably one of the most abusive homes that I’d ever been in when ironically enough I heard speaking in tongues for the first time. The group home mother was very into the Pentecostal church. I didn’t except it readily. But when I heard speaking in tongues I felt a strange craving for it. I knew in some odd way it was truth. Though out of order. Jumping ahead to the age of sixteen I ran away for the last time. The courts finally emancipated me. Still in the midst of it all I was caught up in drugs and sex and anything else I needed to do to survive. Oddly enough I still had the terrible feeling that God was displeased with me. There was just never anyway that I could see to do the right thing when everything in my life was wrong. How could God love a girl who ran with gangs or slept with men? How could He forgive the lies and the manipulation I took a part in to survive? I myself had a hard time looking in the mirror how could He accept me and bless me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
excathedra Posted July 22, 2006 Share Posted July 22, 2006 of course he loved and accepted you, even before you were born, from what i understand sleeping around, drugs, you got to that place through no fault of your own and even if it was all your fault (which it wasn't ) this savior is complete and beyond all that hugs and love Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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excathedra
of course he loved and accepted you, even before you were born, from what i understand
sleeping around, drugs, you got to that place through no fault of your own
and even if it was all your fault (which it wasn't ) this savior is complete and beyond all that
hugs and love
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