I am stymied by the choice of words in the poll, but I love the fundamental question. Do I wish I had never been involved with TWI?
I would have to say no.
Certainly, on some level, I wish I could relive that particular black hole in my life - spend it more wisely. Yet it is as much a part of me as all the sound and lasting choices I've made. Sure, I would have been better off had I used those years to finish college earlier, be smarter about love, pursue meaningful work sooner... a virtual what-ifathon. But I cannot realistically regret the nature of a path that taught me so much.
I cherish the parts of myself that led me into fellowshipping with the Way. The conviction, the rebellion, the drama and passion... I might never have embraced them so fully if I hadn't wasted them so thoroughly for the better part of a decade.
That compromise of my individuality is something I will never forget. And, more importantly, it is something that is no longer possible - not to THAT degree - thanks to a lesson learned the hard way.
TWI is a part of me. It's a ragged, sometimes bitter, but mostly-digested revision of self that I value immensely. I couldn't take it back. I would lose what I became.
[This message was edited by pamsandiego on February 09, 2004 at 2:16.]