Wow! My situation and the way I've handled things with family is almost identical to Lindyhopper. Do I know you? :)--> Anyway, I'm actually very blown away to hear the parents side of it from some of you! Any other advice from the parents point of view would be really cool to hear and may help Bluzie too.
Joe and Lucy are living in NK and still in. They are still corps as far as I know but not running a branch or twig. Hope, your friend can probably look up their phone number on a search engine or maybe nknative can look it up in her itty bitty 28 page nk phone book. As far as your friend being concerned that they won't talk to her, I wouldn't bet on it. Many people have been relieved and overjoyed to have communication with their old friends again. I'm sure they'll never be as close as they once were but at least the communication is healing for all involved.