oh geez, where do i start? i was in TWI before i was even born. my reformed hippie parents met at a twig, got married in 1978 in the way woods, and had me a year later. i'm a little fuzzy when it comes to exact dates, but i think our family went WOW in '83, way down south. our WOW family were a bunch of jerks who also happened to have a jerk son-child molester. when i told my mother what was happening all she told me was to forget about it. i didn't, she did. thanks mom.
in '85 we began our residence at the indiana campus. F12 represent! i have mostly happy memories of our residence years, as i think most mini corps do. i think someone else on here mentioned having the chicken pox? i remember that very well. just loads of kids, always someone to play with and get into trouble with. (because getting in trouble wasn't such a big deal then). i started first grade at rome city and it seemed like my classes were full of way kids, all with the same crappy sack lunches. trail mix and those tiny little cans of pineapple juice. ugh. i would've been happy to stay in the mini corps forever if it weren't for the gawd awful boring fellowships; i was always trying to hide somewhere to get out of them. with the exception of the crafts portion, i was constantly bored and irritable. i was given my first pack of "retemory" cards in residence... "children, obey your parents in the lord, for this is right...ephesians 6:1" gee, i wonder why this is the only one i can remember?
after our two years we got sent to the north east where my P's were FCs.
i did not adjust well to the move away from the IC, i really loved it there and i missed all my friends terribly. every year i would count down to children's camp and ROA (did anyone else try to keep their wrist bands on all year? and then have your secular friends back home ask you why you were in the hospital?) i was just devastated to be out in the real world.
after a few years of moving and switching schools i started to get more and more difficult. emotionally i was a wreck and i began to notice this odd habit my parents had of putting TWI before me. of course it was right, we had a "god first" (or was it "LCM first") plaque sitting forever on the mantel to remind us, but i felt neglected none-the-less. it got to the point where the leadership were telling me to "renew my mind" about every 5 seconds. but i only got grumpier. 3 x week twigs were no blessing, and at 2+ hours a pop they took up so much of my time it is a real wonder i ever had time to do homework. not to mention all the sunday night "hook-ups" and other crap.
then in the early 90's my P's started getting a lot of .... from the leadership in our area. they were in debt because they bought a house and so of course they were getting grief for it. but i also knew that a lot of the problem was me. i had taken PFAL right when i turned 12 but always managed to get out of SIT. when i was a kid in the mini corps my brothers and i did it with no problem, just spitting out gibberish to everyone's seeming delight. when i got older, however, i was too self-conscious to fake it, even though i was sure everyone else was faking too. when called upon, they would just repeat the exact same gibberish as if they had it memorized. even to this day i can remember exactly how my mother SIT, "word" for "word". creepy.
it was the summer of '95, my parents finally sold our house, got out of debt, and were ready to move to our new assignment in ohio. then, right before we were about to leave for the ROA-- BAM! my P's got the most awful call from our L/BC-- they were being dropped from the corps. we were all baffled and i still don't exactly know what their reason was except that maybe it took my parents too long to get out of debt. or my dad missed to many meetings because of his job, it could have been anything. i was totally p'od because i didn't want to move out of that house or to ohio in the first place, so i felt completely betrayed by TWI. my parents were stubborn and decided to go ahead with the move anyway.
that was the year of the last ROA, though i had such a crappy time i don't think i ever wanted to go again anyway. as usual we were planning to stay in the family corps tent, but since they dropped my P's like the night before we left we didn't have time to make any other arrangements. they "mercifully" let us stay in the tent anyway, but acted like total jerks doing it and everyday some leadership would come by and discuss it all with my P's in front of everyone. it was completely demoralizing. then of course there were also my corps friends who treated me like i had the plague. i wasn't allowed to wear my corps nametag anymore and people were constantly comming up to remind me. argh.
after we moved my P's weren't FC's anymore, but we went fellowship as usual and the folks who ran it were pretty nice. they were from HQ but went back after a few months. i wish i could remember their names. then they were replaced by a bunch of total a-holes, whose names i do remember, but will keep to myself. it was the beginning of the end for me. i was in my 3rd year of high school and it was time for LCM's brand spanking new PFAL class (aka: ego trip). i didn't want to take it. my dad said i had to. it was total hell. when it came time at the end for us to all SIT i refused. the guy running it (also our FC) told me i was probably possessed by devil spirits and that i was why i was always causing problems. one night my mom and i were driving home and she was pleading with me to just SIT, just once, for her (so she could then go tell everyone i had done it probably), and if i didn't she claimed she was going to have to ground me. so i was grounded. it seemed like every time i went to twig our FC was always pointing out something that was wrong with me to everyone: my hair wasn't brushed, my jeans were torn (hey, it was the 90s, remember grunge?) i wasn't smiling enough, i didn't like hugging people (gee, i wonder why? can anyone say "trust issues"?). all the while his son could walk around like freakin' christ on earth with his butt hanging out of his jeans and no one said boo to him. only people involved with TWI understand what this kind of unrelenting criticism three times and week, for years on end does to to kid...
then my P's were put on "spiritual probation" and someone accused my dad of being a "homo"-- which is the most laughable thing i ever heard. my P's are already huge homophobes from all of LCM's "adam and eve, not adam and steve" B.S., so of course they didn't take it too well. i think it made my dad even more homophobic, if that's possible.
so we moved AGAIN. 3rd and final highschool. more angry. after a few months the P's started going to twig again, but i had had enough. i just couldn't understand why my parents wanted to be involved with a ministry that had repeatedly insulted them, publicly humiliated them, told them they didn't know how to raise their kids, and sent them packing all over the country for no good reason. yet they ate it up. TWI told my P's if i wasn't going to twigs i should be put out of the house. this was the one and only time my parents ever said no, but only because i was still and minor and in high school. by this time years of emotional turmoil and neglect had taken their toll, i was acutely depressed. so after i graduated HS i moved out and never looked back.
my P's are still in, sadly. it is such a slap in the face, really. we talk occasionally, once a month or so, yet they swear TWI has totally changed since LCM left (though they don't know or don't like to discuss the details). i see them a couple times a year. i'm sure TWI has told them to distance themselves from me, which is easy because i am far, far away in grad school (full scholarship! how's that for an atheist?) my brother and i are both in therapy now, which of course my parents also don't understand... but i'm finally starting to heal from all the .... i endured for 16 years.
whew!
