ChattyKathy

This open forum has become real electric of late. I understand the need to inject humor, it is my middle name but Norm how much can you actually balance it out with humor if you are starting threads so you have a forum to fight with folks?

We email each other, I think I know a little about you but to be honest to read some of the current threads going on over here is making my stomach sick. I mean it is literally making my stomach sick.

I was screwed by twi beyond description, and I want you to know that to read how you are speaking to some folks is adding to that for me. Don't you think there is a balance to free speech amongst each other? No one here is all right in all things we are saying, are we? Not even me right this second in time to you.

Maybe I am just still too tender in the wound area, but I can't take this stuff. Do you think others may feel the same?

This Tragic person got lost in that thread--now moved to soap opera. Had they returned I have to wonder if yall would have noticed.

Sorry but my stomach just can't take it over here right now.

Norm, you have much to offer here, give us that stuff okay?!

Kath

---am I going to wish I wasn't in this thread.

Thank you my dear bug man.

Firebee,

You know the one about the sister, add that one here also.

Kath

I walk at lunch with a blonde Swede who is so fiesty she makes me look like a lamb.

Anyway she is telling me this account of her night that I thought someone else may enjoy.

She and hubby are driving along a back road and are engaged in a heated talk about what store to pick up milk from (don't ask ) when all of a sudden a deer runs out in front of them and wham they hit it. Both get out of the truck and see it did some pretty major damage to the front in. (if you only knew how often this happens in my neck of the woods) They call the police on their cell. He arrives and the first thing he says is "so do you want to keep the fresh kill", "cause if not I need to get on the horn right away and call someone on the list to come get it". Then he says to the hubby ya think it is still diveable back to your home?

Well at this point the hubby is just standing there fixated on the front of the truck, he don't even know anyone else is in the universe. This is his work truck (he owns it though) and he feels about his truck and tools like my hubby does. It is this odd affection they have going. LMAO

So he hears nothing the officer is saying but no matter cause my friend is the mouth for that couple anyway it appears. She turns and looks up at this man, she is all of 4'9" maybe and says "yea sure there buddy we want the kill, what the he11 did you think we were out here for anyway, that is how we hunt--with the front end of our truck, we only called you out here to document what a huge deer this is". Then before the man can speak she says "you will have to forgive my husband here I think he may have regressed due to metal shock, I will get him home now and take him into the garage where he can heal up".

This officer looks at the husband and touches him on the shoulder and says "God bless you man".

They get back into the truck and the only words he says to her is "gee honey sometimes you make me look like such a fool". To which she replies "only sometimes, well he11 I must be slipping then".

And my hubby thinks I am turning into a handful.

You are correct, it was Rick Walton.

Kath

MNS,

Well ya must of been walking there.

And I don't mean that in a twi 'I hate to hear their phrases' way either.

You helped out our dear little bug man there.

Kath

Last I knew he had married a staff corps girl, he himself having been in the 23rd wc. That was somewhere in the area of the fall of 1995. Thought they were going to remain on staff, but not sure.

Kath

RG,

Thank you for all you bring to this forum.

And thank you for all you have brought to my husband and myself outside of here. We have the highest of respect and love for you Jon.

Kathy

(I was not talking about CFF in another post of mine, just a fyi for you)

This was in our company newsletter today, thought it may bring a smile.

1) I believe that if anything were worth doing right now, it would have been done already.

2) I will never rush into a job without a long period of adequate consideration.

3) I will meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of serious injury I could expect to receive from missing them.

4) It at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

5) I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.

6) I obey the law of inverse excuses, which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.

7) I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility of new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

8) I will never put off until tomorrow what I can forget about forever.

Dearest Kay,

So sorry to hear of Tim's difficult times. I agree with you, how could either of you deal with this without God.

Knowing He is there loving ya both up.

Kath

Mark,

Giving yall attention is one of the highlights in my life.

Kath

---we sure didn't let ya did we Mark?

Kath

Mark,

Are ya excited there man??????

Kath

You mean we have to have a reason.

Kath

Praying now for ya Bob.

Much love,

Kathy

TheEvan,

Even though you and I may see things differently, you have always been very kind towards me.

Thank you for that heart you have.

Happy everyday to ya.

Kathy

Q. This myasthenia gravis, does it effect your memory at all?

A. Yes.

Q. And in what way does it affect your memory?

A. I forget.

Q. You forget. Can you give us an example of something you've forgotten.

Q. Did you blow your horn or anything?

A. After the accident?

Q. Before the accident.

A. Sure, I played for ten years, I even went to school for it.

Q. How was your first marriage terminated?

A. By death.

Q. And by whose death was it terminated?

Q. Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A. No.

Q. Did you check for a blood pressure?

A. No.

Q. Did you check for breathing?

A. No.

Q. So, then is it possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A. No.

Q. How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A. Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q. But could the patient still have been alive nevertheless?

A. Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Q. What is your date of birth?

A. July fifteenth.

Q. What year?

A. Every year.

Q. How old is your son, the one living with you?

A. Thirty-five or thirty-eight, I can't remember which.

Q. How long has he lived with you?

A. Forty-five years.

Q. What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?

A. He said "Where am I Cindy?"

Q. And why did that upset you?

A. My name is Susan.

Q. And where was the location of the accident?

A. Approx milepost 499.

Q. And where is milepost 499?

A. Probably between milepost 498 and 500.

Q. Can you describe the individual?

A. He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q. And was this a male or female?

Q. Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a depostion notice which I sent to your attorney?

A. No, this is the dress I where to go to work.

Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A. All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

I need to smile tonight, so hopefully you will to.

Kath

Kay1952,

Have fun any ole day why don't ya.

Kathy

Do something you enjoy that day and have fun doing it.

Happy Birthday to you Plotinus!

Kathy

Mark,

A few to add to yours:

6. She tripped over a cordless phone

7. She got stabbed in a shoot-out

8. She asked for a price at a Dollar Store

9. It takes her two hours to watch "60 Minutes"

10. She studied for a urine test - and failed

11. She sold the car for gas money

12. When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur

around the home, she moved

13. When she went to the airport and saw a sign

that said "Airport Left", she turned around

and went home

So Mark, do I sound blonde?

Paw,

Sorry I been bugging you this week, never know what a person has on their plate do ya?

But when time, please will ya respond to my last email.

Kathy

PS I am going to restart the S/O mag thread

My son just sent these to me, and I need a break from my anger type posting.

Some too "whatever" to post, but here's the rest, trust they bring a smile or two.

AR on vegetarians:

Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning "lousy hunter".

On fabric softener:

My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for.

Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, "married" and walking away.

Fabric softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of our clothes.

On Cripes:

My wife's from the Midwest. Very nice people there.

Very wholesome.

They use words like "cripes", "for cripes sake".

Who would that be "Jesus Cripes"? The son of "gosh" of the church of "holy moly"?

I'm not making fun of it.

You think I wanna burn in "heck"?

On grandma:

My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says "sexy senior citizen".

You don't want to think of your grandmother that way, do you?

Out entering wet shawl contests.

Makes you wonder where she got that dollar bill she gave you for your birthday.

Now if I can only find out who this Lorena chick is that has mariachi in her email address. See I was only copied on this email from him, she was the sent to.

Kath

A blonde is driving down the street and she sees another blonde in the soybean field rowing her arms in a boat like she is in the water.

She stops her car, gets out and yells to this blonde "you know it is blondes like you that give us a bad name", "if I knew how to swim I would come out there and kick your butt".