Bramble

Mj--I was in that catagory. I was such a kid, even though I was in college. And while I wasn't self destructive, I was a huge risk taker.

Funny, I had left the catholic church a few years earlier than my involvement in TWI because the fear of hell stuff ceased to scare me.

TWI taught no hell, We are righteous now... and it wasn't until the nineties that I realized I was running on fear--fear of 'opening a door to the Adversary,' fear of causing harm to my children by my unbelief, fear of humiliation and reproof, fear of being a 'conduit' for devil spirits. Later on there was the fear of losing my marriage in the pressure...

Hmm, things I hide. . .

My identity on the internet.

Rollos-- when I don't want to share. Feel a little guilty about that!

Books in my bedroom--not exactly hidden but Off Limits to my bookworm kid due to adult content. Or due to the sheer amount of $$ I have sunk into some of them. Also, some videos, dvd's. Outa site outa mind. No guilt there, mom decision.

At work, I 'hide' my Wiccan beliefs--in the broomcloset, heehee--but I have no guilt about that. It is a secular workplace, and no one's business. Plus I work daily with two very conservative Christians and I suspect they would have issues. Why start a drama?

Hey, Tom, maybe we could tailgate in the parking lot! Brats and brew!

A fellowship type meeting, with songs and a teaching and manifestations? No, I wouldn't go.

If I wanted to I could find an exway group with in a reasonable drive. Decided several years ago that wasn't for me.

However, if there was a purely social event, like a picnic or campout, and lots of GSC people were attending, I might go.

Thanks for all the advice.

I want to look into getting a pen drive--several people recommended that, and I now have an internet backup, so phew!

I suspect it was (3) magnetic damage.

I will be ever so careful from now on.

But I did get a message from a famous author (Mercedes Lackey) who has had it happen to her. She paid the big bucks to recover it, but then. she has big bucks!

Ahh, Brother Lingo, your Amazing Davy experience gave me shivers.

Waaah! It is what I--gulp--feared!!

I have floppy that I've been saving stuff on, used it yesterday, but today it won't open on either computer!???

The message I get is that it needs formated.

Did I break it?

Shellon--

'I'm very proud that I kept my marriage vows and protected my children.'

Good for you.

Ditto

We had a HFC who systematically picked an individual or family and rode them until they left or blew up and got booted.

We were dumb enough to believe his take on the hidden darkness in their lives for a couple of years. He was an old buddy of my husband's, from their early ministry days.

Time went by, and his scrutiny turned on us. As life in the Way goes, we had an ally--the limb coord was an old friend of my hubby's from his wow year. So things happened--tons of reproof, but not anything that escalated. However, since the HFC was always 'working' on something with us, we were kept in his fellowship, a forty minute cross town drive, while others were moved to fellowships near their homes. There was a fellowship within walking distance of our house.

The HFC disliked me, and would be particularly nasty to me if I went to HF by myself, which happened all the time because our kids were in kindergarten and first grade and couldn't be up late. But he was always nice to hubby.

Then our limb coordinator buddy got booted. The new Limb really disliked us--I was ill on a branch Sunday, and my husband was not able to work on the set up crew.Omygosh! What weakness in our lives!

Our bully of an HFC quickly saw the balance of power had changed and zeroed in. We took a three week vacation and regained our sanity. When we returned, the HFC had a new area for us to 'work' on under his 'spiritual'eyes. We walked away. A few weeks later we were mark and avoid. I think we spoke evil of the ministry or something.

Quote:

Just WHY are you guys so loathe to dismiss all the supernatural stuff to myth and/or superstition?

****

Don't know, Sudo. Do you? Seriously, you think I can answer that??

Could it just be differences in human nature? Genetic? Or attempts to bring order out of chaos? I don't know.

As for people treating you like crap cuz you're an athiest--hey that wasn't me! How rude, I say. I'm all,"Be free little butterfly!"

I guess I’m one of those dreaded ‘ threw the baby out with the bath water’ types.

I was the way’s version of chapter and verse for many years, each year more miserable than the last.

After we left (5 years now) we did some exway ministry stuff, but had no great experience there, the ‘twig’ seemed very controlling. Moved onto churches, cuz I thought we should, people were nice, lots of activities for kids, but could never really settle down in one.

During our church time I began to explore other belief systems out of curiosity, and goddess spirituality/Wiccan beliefs were electrifying to me.

I studied these beliefs while still attending a church for quite a while. Tried several times to get excited about Christian/Bible beliefs but that was gone–like it evaporated, disappeared..

I finally admitted to myself that I had changed, and wanted to continue on this path, and so I have.

Chapter and verse brought much turmoil and stress to my life. I don’t miss it, gave enough of my life to it. All my happy memories of good times were pretty much spoiled by our last years IN, and by M&A.

I’m not one who gives the Way big credit for saving me or teaching me about God, or about life. It did teach me about being wary of those who have the absolute truth, the true religion.

The Bluzeman's fine, original song has brought back memories of my Monkee past!!

The Monkee I was supposed to marry.

I remember this VERY clearly now. This WAS the direction my life should have taken.

At age ten, I had great wisdom. Great Monkee, forgive me for not growing up and marrying Davy.

Hi Mr. Moonlight,

I waited for my spouse to desire to leave for several years. It wasn't easy, but he eventually saw how unbalanced life was, how ugly things got. And I had to be so careful about not voicing all my complaints etc.

It was a great unburdening when we left.

I don't think he would have wanted to divorce me, but since there were children I think he might have been persuaded to divorce and get custody to keep them 'in the protection of the Household.'

Have a lovely birthday!

You might be in a cult if..... some one scolded you for the state of your sock drawer and you are forty years old!

We're big fans here--our family's version of watching Lawrence Welk with the folks. Our kids vote, my sister and I IM through the whole show.

Amy was the girl with the wild hair. We liked her.

Latoya should have been in the top three, but she's so talented she'll make it without winning.

Quote from Schwaigers:

We aren't good enough to just rely on ourselves, but if we rely on somebody else, they will destroy us.

***

Great observation.

I know that since we have been 'on our own,' after we left the exway groups and church hopping, we have weathered some difficult things on our own (Except for siblings)

--parent's deaths, illness, etc.

And things have turned out all right. We have far more financial abundance than we ever did while IN, which is a big stress reducer. While we don't have close friends, we do have family if there's a big need, and day to day living is pleasant, not hectic and stressed.

Friends are starting to fit in with our hobbies/activities. Just not close ones.

In the Way we had instant friends. People in the twig or branch. I'm thinking it really takes longer.

Jezusfreaky--you sound like such a good and kind person, I bet you are a lovely friend. I hope you find a good friend who treats you right.

Valerie--I understand what you mean about the recruiting. Sometimes I think I would actually have closer friends if I pursued people more, but that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

I think the timing of life is part of the problem , too. I am so busy with work, kids activities, home, some volunteer work, and hubby works lots of overtime and I don't want to not be around when he is home.

Plus, for the first time in my adulthood, I can spend time on my own interests and hobbies, and I don't want to give that up!

Risk--that's it.

I no longer have friends that I will risk pain over. All the friends I have now could drop out of my life tomorrow--except my sister!--and there would be no upheaval, no children's tears, no heartache, so significant change.

I have some friends on the net--I'm in a journal loop, hang out at a few chat rooms--that know more about my emotional life than my in the flesh friends.

Perhaps as time goes by and I heal I will again have fuller friendships.

When I was in the Way I had friends that I treated and trusted like family--they could visit without calling first, had keys to my house, swapped babysitting, had lots of planned and unplanned playdates, did family stuff together.

Then things changed--scheduling, two by two rules, fellowships split into different branches etc. Plus we were on the ****e list with the new limb coordinator. But we still found time to get together.

Then later, we left TWI and were slandered and M&A. I lost all those friends, who I looked upon as sisters.

We moved home, and my real sister and I have become very close--she's the only person who has a key to my house or can drop by anytime she's in the area, we talk several times a day, or IM, and our families get together.

Other friends are based on whatever activites I enjoy. One lady from work enjoys plays and theater, so we go to stuff in our area, but we've never planned family activities, and probably never will, even though we have children in the same age range.

I have some friends in the pagan/wiccan community, we meet for coffee a couple times a month, or join up to go to a larger meeting together,email alot, but don't visit much(don't all live in the same town, either.) And don't do family stuff together.

I don't tell people about my years in TWI much or 'share my heart,' like I did in the past with my TWI friends. Don't want people to know deeply personal things about me.

My question:

Why couldn't a Biblical research ministry figure out what 'present truth' meant?

I saw it, and the Friends final ep, since my hubby likes both those shows. Both were all right.

'Angel the Series' ends next week. The Jossverse is gone. Weeping a little weep.