Uh no.....You might find yourself alone on that one. But that was hella funny!!
Oh, surely everyone knows anybody can be a dog on the internet, you want to be jewish, ya, you can be jewish, you want to be a astronaunt, you can be an astronaut... as long as what you are doing is legal, no problem...surely someone here would be willing to admit they represented themselves as the King of Indonesia, or a truck driver when in fact they are a restaurant worker...somebody has something funny to say,
My best on also comes from our own chatroom. I would pay good money for a transcript of the proceedings.
One night, someone who was/is rather homophobic came into the room. As soon as I realized this, my warped sense of humor kicked in. Instantly, I became the token gay person. I began by doing all the stereotypical things a gay person would. I messed with him/her for a good three hours (yes, I had no life at the time). Rearranging furniture, suggesting window treatments, etc.
At the three hour mark, someone else in the room suggested to the homophobe that maybe, just maybe, I wasn't really gay, and that perhaps I was just messing with them. At which point they said, "BUT WHAT KIND OF PERSON WOULD DO SO A THING!??!??!?!?!!?!?" I replied, sort of nonchalantly, "An extremely effed up one?" That made the rest of my weekend worthwhile. Sad to say, but true.
My best on also comes from our own chatroom. I would pay good money for a transcript of the proceedings.
One night, someone who was/is rather homophobic came into the room. As soon as I realized this, my warped sense of humor kicked in. Instantly, I became the token gay person. I began by doing all the stereotypical things a gay person would. I messed with him/her for a good three hours (yes, I had no life at the time). Rearranging furniture, suggesting window treatments, etc.
At the three hour mark, someone else in the room suggested to the homophobe that maybe, just maybe, I wasn't really gay, and that perhaps I was just messing with them. At which point they said, "BUT WHAT KIND OF PERSON WOULD DO SO A THING!??!??!?!?!!?!?" I replied, sort of nonchalantly, "An extremely effed up one?" That made the rest of my weekend worthwhile. Sad to say, but true.
Yes, messing with people, its a developed skill, twisted to some. But when you think about it, it is sort of a leadership mind set, after all, too serious is best offset by too ridiculous. A couple times, like during "company meetings", I would walk up to the front of the room, before the meeting got started, and I would announce "I am so glad you are here, you know, you CAN become financially independent by selling soap", which was the best summary statement I could make, not having a blackboard with a big circle on in with the dollar sign in the middle and a box of AMWAY detergent.... (dedicated to all of those of us who got pulled into THAT surprise, by some well meaning acquaintance )...
I think they thought I was a "secret agent" from PETA or something.. but I really was well behaved. Didn't criticize anybody or anything.. even shared tips, how to trap troublesome squirrels.
one poor lady said, "just go away.. go away, Secret Squirrel.. don't bother us.."
"fine. I'll find somebody else.. another place that has a sense of humor.."
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Nottawayfer
Uh no.....You might find yourself alone on that one. But that was hella funny!!
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mchud11
Oh, surely everyone knows anybody can be a dog on the internet, you want to be jewish, ya, you can be jewish, you want to be a astronaunt, you can be an astronaut... as long as what you are doing is legal, no problem...surely someone here would be willing to admit they represented themselves as the King of Indonesia, or a truck driver when in fact they are a restaurant worker...somebody has something funny to say,
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AHAT4JC
The oopsie thread.........by far!!!!!!!!!
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oilfieldmedic
Look at the picture to your left...can we talk goofy?
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WordWolf
Ok, I remembered some of my funnier experiences.
They were all in chatrooms, of course.
One time, I became almost a bystander as 2-3 other people in the room became engrossed in a
personal discussion about relationships. (Teenagers, of course.)
The discussion got to some point where a guy was saying that this girl seemed to be flirting with
him, but then the other person replied that they thought she was still going out with (another name.)
That's when I began typing again.
Me:"Maybe she wants a 'spare.'
You know, a toyfriend."
Him:NO!!!!!
I will not play second banana!"
Me: "Second kielbasa?"
Him:"NO!"
Me:"Second chorizo?"
Him:"NO!"
Me: "Second bratwurst?"
Him:"I will not be a Second-Anything-Penis-Substitute!"
I didn't reply to that.
When you're doubled over your keyboard laughing, holding your stomach,
you can't TYPE.
There were also some running gags I did.
After the anthrax mail scare in Manhattan, I had a running gag.
I would go get coffee.....
"AAAAH!
There's ANTHRAX IN MY COFFEE!
No, wait-that's sugar."
Or getting french fries....
"Aaaaah!
There's ANTHRAX ON MY FRIES!
No, wait-that's salt."
Some people heard me do that one once, and enjoyed sitting in on repeat performances a few days later.
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Sushi
My best on also comes from our own chatroom. I would pay good money for a transcript of the proceedings.
One night, someone who was/is rather homophobic came into the room. As soon as I realized this, my warped sense of humor kicked in. Instantly, I became the token gay person. I began by doing all the stereotypical things a gay person would. I messed with him/her for a good three hours (yes, I had no life at the time). Rearranging furniture, suggesting window treatments, etc.
At the three hour mark, someone else in the room suggested to the homophobe that maybe, just maybe, I wasn't really gay, and that perhaps I was just messing with them. At which point they said, "BUT WHAT KIND OF PERSON WOULD DO SO A THING!??!??!?!?!!?!?" I replied, sort of nonchalantly, "An extremely effed up one?" That made the rest of my weekend worthwhile. Sad to say, but true.
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mchud11
Great stuff here - lol
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mchud11
Yes, messing with people, its a developed skill, twisted to some. But when you think about it, it is sort of a leadership mind set, after all, too serious is best offset by too ridiculous. A couple times, like during "company meetings", I would walk up to the front of the room, before the meeting got started, and I would announce "I am so glad you are here, you know, you CAN become financially independent by selling soap", which was the best summary statement I could make, not having a blackboard with a big circle on in with the dollar sign in the middle and a box of AMWAY detergent.... (dedicated to all of those of us who got pulled into THAT surprise, by some well meaning acquaintance )...
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Ham
Once I set up an account and logged in as "Secret Squirrel" on a squirrel haters message board..
seriously..
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Ham
I think they thought I was a "secret agent" from PETA or something.. but I really was well behaved. Didn't criticize anybody or anything.. even shared tips, how to trap troublesome squirrels.
one poor lady said, "just go away.. go away, Secret Squirrel.. don't bother us.."
"fine. I'll find somebody else.. another place that has a sense of humor.."
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