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Tales of an ex-staff brat

bek

By bek,
in My Story

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bek Newbie

bek

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I know I am a little late to this, having been out and away from HQ for over ten years, but there are still a lot of people that I think of often and would love to reach out to. So, here is my story...

I wasn't just born into the way, my parents met through the way, they were married behind a tent at ROA '76 and I was born the following June. My parents were long time staff members, but never way corps. Since they were on staff in Indiana while my first sister and I were babies, we have both have had the experience of, in our teen years, meeting boys who we had bathed with as babies. (There are always pictures to back this up! Why it was decided that babies should be photographed bathing together confuses me a bit, but you know, we were family!)

My parents spent a few years "in the field" before being called in to headquarters to build the auditorium. That was the first thing of two things that I am angry and bitter about regarding twi. I was a very happy five year old living in Florida, having no idea about snow or bigotry. But HQ called so my parents packed up their three small children and moved them to Ohio in the middle of winter with no winter clothing.

My family always lived off-campus first in St. Marys then in New Knoxville. The St. Marys school kids were awful. They were vicious, we were called names and had to answer the rumours of orgies and mass-abortions. There were no other way kids in our school at that time, so while we attended sunday services they afford the time to form real friendships with the other "staff brats." I basically didn't make any friends until jr high/high school when I fell in with some New Bremen staff kids. At that time I also made some friends at school who were non-way.

My father had been transferred out of "Way Builders" into an office job that he hated, so he eventually quit, which meant my mother could no longer receive a paycheck from twi (a wife's paycheck was an extension of her husband's). So my mother found a new job which wasn't easy since she had left college to work at Emporia and her entire resume was work for the way and having and raising four children. My parents divorced after that (based on my father's decisions not way stuff) and my mother decided it would be best if he had no contact with us until he got his life together. My father decided it was easiest not to have contact with twi since we were still very involved. And he was effectively out.

We moved to New Knoxville to a smaller house to save money. The New Knoxville staff kids had their own little clique, which I didn't really fit into. Don't get me wrong, there was nothing mean. I would get rides to HQs after school for my job (Multi-Services & Housekeeping, woohoo!!) and they were nothing but nice to me, I just never felt close or connected to them. My sister, C, on the other hand fit like a glove. While I made friends outside twi, she only had friends who were believers.

Then the purging started, my mother quit the choir because she couldn't support the hatred that was spewing out of lcm's pulpit. She received a letter informing her that if she stepped foot on twi property she would be arrested for trespassing. This is the second source of anger and bitterness. None of us kids were included in her ousting. We were actively encouraged to continue attending fellowships and services. There was no way in hell I was going to associate with people who would treat my mother like that after the years of sacrifice and service she gave them, so I was done. However my sister couldn't imagine not being part of the twi, and continued going to fellowships and services.

When I chose my mother over twi, my friends stopped talking to me. However, I was never M/A'd so people were able to send my mother messages of love and support through me even though they couldn't risk being seen in the same aisle of the supermarket as my mother.

Yes, people really did that. People my mother had been "friends" with for 15+ years would see her in the supermarket and turn and leave the aisle to avoid becoming marked by association.

I finished my senior year graduated from high school and came to NY. Eventually my mother got remarried and moved out of Ohio with her husband and my two youngest siblings. My sister, C, was really deep in "way brain" until she was in college for awhile and realized there is life and friendship (and truer friendship) outside twi.

Even though I never really "bought in" to the whole indoctrination, there was an effect. I remember when we first moved to New Knoxville, it was such a small quiet town that I would be home by myself in the afternoon and hours would go by without seeing a person or car pass by my house and I would get freaked out, thinking the resurrection had happened and I'd missed out because I couldn't really believe all the way spiel. With every person I couldn't reach on the phone, I would become more convinced and panicked. It seems crazy now, but it was a very real concern for me. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't accept everything they were feeding me. When the purging started I had a great relief that there wasn't this great truth right under my nose that I just wasn't seeing. So I am much more comfortable taking my chances on just being a good person, on my own terms.

So, that's my story. If you recognize me and my family feel free to send an email or private message. We are so happy that so many of our loved ones have managed to break free and move on.

Thanks for taking the time to read this!

Bek

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bek Newbie

bek

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Posted

Thanks likeaneagle!

Having spent a lot of time this weekend reading posts, and recognizing people that I knew, I do feel very comfortable here.

I know I didn't put it in my first post, but I do have a lot of great memories growing up at HQ, especially the many incredible people that twi brought into my life. That's why I am here, to reconnect and share with people who shared what was a big part of my life.

So thank you for welcoming me with such open arms!!

hugs

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  • 3 months later...

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