What kind of leader......

[T-Bone]

On 1/14/2014 at 0:21 PM, skyrider said:

What kind of leader wants a corps more loyalty to himself than to the scriptures? And why?

These were two questions that I pondered over and over during my in-residence corps training. Yeah, disciplined training to persevere thru tough situations.....I get that. But this loyalty to man? to jump and not ask how high? blind loyalty? The corps training, to me, was like jamming a square peg into a round hole. It didn't work....until you shaved off all the corners as a lathe machines wood. Buffeting persisted until one quit resisting.

As a farm kid, the cloning of the corps never made any sense to me. Logical or otherwise. What was I missing? Was there some hidden spiritual awareness just around the bend? Will our unconditional "loyalty" to wierwille be instrumental in understanding how to be a doulos [slave] to the Lord? Sure, twi taught that.....but I didn't see it in the scriptures. Where were those blind loyalists to the Apostle Paul? Heck, one of those guys, Barnabus or Silas, left Paul in a huff and STILL was spotlighted as very influential in the Book of Acts. So, why do I have to be cloned to wierwille's liking??? Ain't buying it one bit!!

Amazingly, I graduated without displaying too much dissent. Close though.

So, what kind of leader demands this loyalty OVER AND ABOVE the letter of The Law, God's Holy Writ?

1) A self-serving cult leader?

2) A narcissistic sociopath?

3) A lazy, deviant con artist?

4) All of the above?

Several times, I nearly left the corps program. The endless meetings? The 4:30am runs to get aerobic points? The filling out reports? Excessive volunteering to exhibit my willingness to learn and grow? Learning the memory pegs and reading Dale Carnegie books? Taking pfal AGAIN for the 20th time? YET....I still didn't understand why they wanted to clone us????

A few exceptions were allowed, sure. Like 8% or so. Some musicians.....some who'd teach us Greek or survival skills. Some favored, because of their money or parents......but the vast majority of us were in this big, cloning factory with no recognizable past, skill sets, or features. We were herded and processed out. The next group would be shipped in soon.

I should have left by Christmas my first year.....but I wasn't a quitter. I had never quit anything. Something's just not right, though. I could see it. I could sense it. And then, I'd doubt myself of what I perceived. No one around me was packing and leaving in the middle of the night.....oh, a few that I didn't know but was told that they'd had 'sponsor/money' problems. The monitoring was intense. If your mood was wrong, then you'd be called aside. Or late? That's a quick red flag.....someone came looking for you.

What if I needed or wanted some ALONE TIME with the Lord that day? Was THAT available? In a word, no. It wasn't. My corps twig coordinator told me that this was a time of training. Every meeting, every event was in preparation for being 'the best.'

At the end of those four years of corps training.....I STILL DIDN'T BELIEVE that I needed to be strictly loyal to wierwille. I detested the cloning, I loathed the hypocrisy.....and was indifferent to the corps training. Had it made me a better man? Not really. Growing up on a farm with older brothers, playing sports and hunting pheasants and rabbits had instilled a discipline and perseverance that scoffed at the ridiculous corps "training."

And, I still found many of the best people in twi were NOT corps.

Why did wierwille demand such loyalty? Because he was a demented, ego-driven dicktator.

I agree with you 500% on your statement “…I still found many of the best people in twi were NOT corps”…I firmly believe that the way corps training did a great job of screwing up people – especially in subverting the Lordship of Jesus Christ…the way corps’ indoctrination process for all practical purposes “installed” a subtle or hidden countermanding protocol that worked as a “driver” to whatever wierwille doctrine you had accumulated thus far before going into the corps.

Your post made me think of a passage in Romans that warns of deceivers getting Christians off track from serving the Lord Jesus Christ.

I urge you, brothers and sisters, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them. For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people. Romans 16: 17, 18 NIV

After the reading of passing of a patriarch and the confusion that ensued from its impact – no wonder I had such a difficult time trying to figure out what was the right thing for me to do. I kept trying to troubleshoot the issues using everything I had learned during my 12 years in TWI. For me - I finally was on the road to some kind of spiritual recovery when I quit referring to PFAL and such like – but rather questioned everything TWI and just used my 2-bit brain and plain scripture.

Edited June 29, 2017 by T-Bone
typos

[Grace Valerie Claire]

13 minutes ago, T-Bone said:

I agree with you 500% on your statement “…I still found many of the best people in twi were NOT corps”…I firmly believe that the way corps training did a great job of screwing up people – especially in subverting the Lordship of Jesus Christ…the way corps’ indoctrination process for all practical purposes “installed” a subtle or hidden countermanding protocol that worked as a “driver” to whatever wierwille doctrine you had accumulated thus far before going into the corps.

Your post made me think of a passage in Romans that warns of deceivers getting Christians off track from serving the Lord Jesus Christ.

I urge you, brothers and sisters, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them. For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people. Romans 16: 17, 18 NIV

After the reading of passing of a patriarch and the confusion that ensued from its impact – no wonder I had such a difficult time trying to figure out what was the right thing for me to do. I kept trying to troubleshoot the issues using everything I had learned during my 12 years in TWI. For me - I finally was on the road to some kind of spiritual recovery when I quit referring to PFAL and such like – but rather questioned everything TWI and just used my 2-bit brain and plain scripture.

T-Bone, all that time and money spent on your Corps training, that could have been used for buying a home, or going to a "real" college.But, I don't think your time was completely wasted; you did learn a few things from your training.  

[T-Bone]

4 hours ago, Grace Valerie Claire said:

T-Bone, all that time and money spent on your Corps training, that could have been used for buying a home, or going to a "real" college.But, I don't think your time was completely wasted; you did learn a few things from your training.  

An interesting line of thought…and I’ll tell you what – stepping back – I can say I even learned a few things in my overall cult experience but I’ll narrow it down here to my corps training – suffice it to say there is one thing that I won’t do that I did when I joined a cult - - I will never just chuck something away without some serious – really serious thinking first – like many of us did when we first joined TWI and were encouraged to get rid of anything that reminded us of our “old man” nature…Penworks’ book   Undertow  resonated with me on so many things she said – especially the part about getting rid of our old identities when we joined TWI. my review of "Undertow"

Getting back into the flow of life FAR and AWAY from TWI – I prefer to manage any accumulated knowledge, nonsense, memories, skills, experiences, etc. with a little more wisdom now. Yeah – I own it all – I’m not going to play games and deny something didn’t happen – I’m not going to throw out anything – but I can choose how all that will affect me.

 There are numerous passages in the Bible that speak to the injured, the hurt, the unfortunate, the deceived… not only to console or enlighten or warn or redirect but in time how those same people can then empathize with others who suffer …and not just empathize but actually lend a helping hand! Maybe that’s what keeps making me address any corps still standing with TWI…..(Now switching to my impression of Darryl Hammond’s impression of Bill Clinton saying) “I feel your pain” (bites lower lip)  hey folks, wake up and get out…

-  - -(switching back to regular T-Bone voice) …  Ok….back to previously scheduled programming….corps training – what did I get out of it….

Let’s see…getting into biblical Greek was fun – I’ve held onto the Analytical Greek Lexicon and a few other real reference tools I bought when I was in residence - still refer to them occasionally and I did like participating in the public speaking courses and Way Productions; while all this did give me a taste of public performance – it also helped reaffirm my preference for being in more of a supportive role to whatever is going on.

In other words, if it’s about putting a teaching or study together – I would have loved doing the research on it or outlining the main points so that it all flowed logically. I prefer to contribute or collaborate – I have no desire to be the star of the show. If it’s music – I lean more towards being a recording artist or composer - rather than a performing artist (I’m a great bass player in my head but I can’t re-record a stinky live performance like I can a bad bass track in the studio   ). You know…I’m a self-taught musician – and they say people who cannot do – teach - - oh my goodness – will the circle be unbroken ?

Maybe it’s a survivor’s thing that I can salvage anything – I dunno….generally speaking I think putting up with the corps’ meathead leadership, sleep-deprivation scheduling, constantly berating us over the most nit-pickiest things, and a gazillion other torturous routines produced in me some qualities that help me to survive in the real world – especially if there’s any egotistical shallow inexperienced know-it-alls in the mix who think shortchanging, bull$hitting or some razzle dazzle will fool me.

I’ve learned how much I can endure. I’ve learned how to spot bull$hit a mile away. I’ve learned that to survive and yea thrive in any legitimate business environment I have to embrace the mission and truly make it my own. Perhaps the biggest things I’ve learned – (the hard way I might add…which is learning from my mistakes of depending on “the principles” and “keys” that I learned in TWI / the way corps)  – is that simple stuff like common sense, logic, humility, and honesty are some of the best components in designing a system, a process, a business, a product, a service – cuz not a whole lot of that was used when wierwille designed the way corps program – and you can see how well that worked!

Now I will say this…it may take some re-tooling of the mind – but I think all that stuff about commitment, attention to detail, integrity, accuracy, serving others, physical discipline, etc. that we had drummed into our heads is great if it’s not misplaced…if it’s not so I can be the best sycophant for whoever is prez of TWI…yeah - let ME be the one to decide what MY priorities are. Let ME choose what I want to dedicate MY life to…let ME …oh, you get the idea…God bless and good night…

(ok last subliminal message: hey corps still standing with TWI, wake up and get out! )

Edited June 30, 2017 by T-Bone
clarity

[Grace Valerie Claire]

11 minutes ago, T-Bone said:

An interesting line of thought…and I’ll tell you what – stepping back – I can say I even learned a few things in my overall cult experience but I’ll narrow it down here to my corps training – suffice it to say there is one thing that I won’t do that I did when I joined a cult - - I will never just chuck something away without some serious – really serious thinking first – like many of us did when we first joined TWI and were encouraged to get rid of anything that reminded us of our “old man” nature…Penworks’ book   Undertow  resonated with me on so many things she said – especially the part about getting rid of our old identities when we joined TWI. my review of "Undertow"

Getting back into the flow of life FAR and AWAY from TWI – I prefer to manage any accumulated knowledge, nonsense, memories, skills, experiences, etc. with a little more wisdom now. Yeah – I own it all – I’m not going to play games and deny something didn’t happen – I’m not going to throw out anything – but I can choose how all that will affect me.

 There are numerous passages in the Bible that speak to the injured, the hurt, the unfortunate, the deceived… not only to console or enlighten or warn or redirect but in time how those same people can then empathize with others who suffer …and not just empathize but actually lend a hand! Maybe that’s what keeps making me address any corps still standing with TWI…..(Now switching to my impression of Darryl Hammond’s impression of Bill Clinton saying) “I feel your pain” (bites lower lip)  hey folks, wake up and get out…

-  - -(switching back to regular T-Bone voice) …  Ok….back to previously scheduled programming….corps training – what did I get out of it….

Let’s see…getting into biblical Greek was fun – I’ve held onto the Analytical Greek Lexicon and a few other real reference tools I bought when I was in residence - still refer to them occasionally and I did like participating in the public speaking courses and Way Productions; while all this did give me a taste of public performance – it also helped reaffirm my preference for being in more of a supportive role to whatever is going on. In other words, if it’s about putting a teaching or study together – I would have loved doing the research on it or outlining the main points so that it all flowed logically. I prefer to contribute or collaborate – I have no desire to be the star of the show. If it’s music – I lean more towards being a recording artist or composer - rather than a performing artist (I’m a great bass player in my head but I can’t re-record a stinky live performance like I can a bad bass track in the studio   ). You know…I’m a self-taught musician – and they say people who cannot do – teach - - oh my goodness – will the circle be unbroken ?

Maybe it’s a survivor’s thing that I can salvage anything – I dunno….generally speaking I think putting up with the corps’ meathead leadership, sleep-deprivation scheduling, constantly berating us over the most nit-pickiest things, and a gazillion other torturous routines produced in me some qualities that help me to survive in the real world – especially if there’s any egotistical shallow inexperienced know-it-alls in the mix who think shortchanging, bull$hitting or some razzle dazzle will fool me.

I’ve learned how much I can endure. I’ve learned how to spot bull$hit a mile away. I’ve learned that to survive and yea thrive in any legitimate business environment I have to embrace the mission and truly make it my own. Perhaps the biggest things I’ve learned – (the hard way I might add…which is learning from my mistakes of depending on “the principles” and “keys” that I learned in TWI / the way corps)  – is that simple stuff like common sense, logic, humility, and honesty are some of the best components in designing a system, a process, a business, a product, a service – cuz not a whole lot of that was used when wierwille designed the way corps program – and you can see how well that worked!

Now I will say this…it may take some re-tooling of the mind – but I think all that stuff about commitment, attention to detail, integrity, accuracy, serving others, physical discipline, etc. that we had drummed into our heads is great if it’s not misplaced…if it’s not so I can be the best sycophant for whoever is prez of TWI…yeah - let ME be the one to decide what MY priorities are. Let ME choose what I want to dedicate MY life to…let ME …oh, you get the idea…God bless and good night…

(ok last subliminal message: hey corps still standing with TWI, wake up and get out! )

T-Bone, your post is so good in should be on the Front Cover of every newspaper in Way World, and beyond!!!  Excellent post!

 

 

 

 

[T-Bone]

thanks Grace

[Grace Valerie Claire]

1 minute ago, T-Bone said:

thanks Grace

Oye Vey!!