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I HATED corps night


Dot Matrix
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I absolutely HATED corps night.

Each Wednesday a horrible thing would happen. No the moon did not turn red nor did the bats come out and attack. Instead, we went on the most grueling adventure. We would dress-up and march ourselves to corps night.

Then, they would, in a voice that had to be a one-note drone on behalf of Walter and/or Dr. Weirwille, take us on a research trip into the Bible.

I did not understand of what in the heck they spoke. I fought falling asleep and lived in quivered fear pleading with God NOT to be called on to stand and receipt a retemory card (as I did not memorize them)

After this adventure in boredom we would then meet in “twig” and talk about how great it was. I would make things up if I spoke at all because I thought surely I must have spirits if I HATED corps night.

After that we had another meeting, unless memory fails me I think we had an afterglow. I maybe wrong and that may have been Sunday. But that thing lasted a calendar year each day we had one. And there was always the eager talker who would want to “share” just when you thought you were going to get out of there.

I used to envision the “sharer” being mugged by the rest of us.

This was always a deep secret I carried with me. I think we discussed it here once, but two days ago an old corps brother and I chatted about our corps night hatred, fears and inability to understand the droning of the teachers. We each thought perhaps we were mentally challenged, until we realized it really WAS awful.

Previously I thought everyone was smater than I was, or they were very good at faking.

Now, I have been set free.

edited for punctuation

Edited by Dot Matrix
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God must have numbed me, as I do not recall two. Was it John or Craig and then the king of boredom Walter?

Who did the first one?

Then, after ALL that sitting and mental sleeping, we had to work. We would have something else to do. Like, "Now we have the privilege to do bless patrol. Remember the flaming arrow shot into the sign? I bet it was an older corps person who had nightmares about Wednesdays.

Remember the poem about Saturday's child? Wasn't Wednesday's child full of sorrow? I bet SHE was corps.

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I remember one Corps Night when I spaced out through the whole thing. Later when we met in twig this chick went on and on about the greatness of it all. I was thinking Gee. sorry I missed it.

I felt like I really blew it to space out through the whole thing.

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Then, when Walter and Doctor would talk back and forth like they were discovering something. It was like a dull Martin and Lewis stumbling through Greek....

The LSD would have been an improvement> LOL

Out and about

I used to think I must have spirits cause I would not "be there" but now I think they were angels with their wings in our ears protecting us.

The people who LOVED it, do you think they were faking?

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the 2 teachings were

first they would let an apprentice go on stage

like george hendley or a dave bedard or someone

then the real heavy stuff would come from the heavy drinker

drown my sorrows, pass me that glass, bastad

--

ps. the apprentice may have come on second

fortunately it's all a blur to me now

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Oh thank the Lord that I missed all of that excitement! We got to listen to the voice comming out of the wall at Emporia.

Then the great and wonderful Rev Fart would come out and drone on for an hour or so about what his darling, spoiled son Skyler had done that day. If we were really 'blessed' the marvelously monsterous Cindy would come out and share how dissapointed she was in some little insignificant thing for another hour.

Then it was off to twig...my twig coordinator was a realist we talked about just about anything that was actually interesting and then when it seemed like we had been at twig long enough so we wouldn't get into trouble we went off to bed.

I just loved that woman...wonder whatever happened to her?

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as far as the farts..... they should have gone through the wall, eh ?

Oh I think nearly everyone dreamed of that at least once, especially Cindy, he was a worm without her.

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have you ever read about poor rochelle and sunesis's comments

Concerning the Farts? No. Do you have a link or know where I can find them?

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no i don't know

but i'll bet someone here can direct you

i will try to find it

Thanks I appreciate that very much.

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does luke 6:21 really say that ?

Luke 6:21: KJV

Blessed are ye that hunger now: for ye shall be filled.

blessed are ye that weep now: for ye shall laugh.

22:

Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for he Son of man's sake,

23:

Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in the heaven: for in the like manner did their fathers unto the prophets.

I put it there to remind me that I can endure anything on this earth because my reward comes from God not man. It is also an honorary thing for those that have paid a bigger price than myself. This is my way of honoring them and maybe giving them a little something. I try to remind them that their reward is greater than that which they endured. They will not always cry or feel pain.

So "yes" it really says that.

Edited 'cause I still cant spell

Edited by Eyesopen
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God must have numbed me, as I do not recall two. Was it John or Craig and then the king of boredom Walter?

Who did the first one?

Then, after ALL that sitting and mental sleeping, we had to work. We would have something else to do. Like, "Now we have the privilege to do bless patrol. Remember the flaming arrow shot into the sign? I bet it was an older corps person who had nightmares about Wednesdays.

Remember the poem about Saturday's child? Wasn't Wednesday's child full of sorrow? I bet SHE was corps.

Wednesday's child is full of woe...

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Eyes open

So your corps night was with Craig? I cannot think of ANYTHING worse. He would talk in circles, make no sense and scream.

Now if he called on you to stand and speak forth a verse and you (I) didn't know it -- I would have had a heart attack right there

Dooj

Full of woe -- still bet she sat through a corps night LOL'

Griff

Blotter acid and a believer burger -- wasn't life grand?

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And speaking of Fart, as if Corps Nite wasn't dreary enough by itself, it seemed like EVERY Corps Nite most of the corps would expell the natural byproduct of the food eaten that day.... in vapor form. I suppose those who stood up to stay awake were luckily not sitting near the fumigators. Hey, that would have been a great twig name... The Fumigators... Anyways, it is IMPOSSIBLE to sleep when your sinuses are singed and your eyes "melted". I believe this is what Craiggy meant when he spoke about "face melting"...

Corps nights were as spiritual as bingo night for the elderly, just not as exciting. I can count on ONE finger the number of TRUE CORPS who really seemed to look forward to "Wednesday Night... Top Floor Wierwilly".

I remember Exie on corps nites, she NEVER paid attention, playin' footsie with people around her. At least SHE gave me something to do, giving me the appearance of having interest...

Edited by tomtuttle1
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Eyes open

So your corps night was with Craig? I cannot think of ANYTHING worse. He would talk in circles, make no sense and scream.

Now if he called on you to stand and speak forth a verse and you (I) didn't know it -- I would have had a heart attack right there

No not Muttindale, Rev Fart and wife Cindy, you know her royal highny HA's daughter. And Michael Fart, he who wouldn't know a real Bible verse if it slapped him in the face.

When Muttindale came to visit he would litterally spend hours at lunch or at a special meeting screaming. Except for right after POP. He was like a little boy that had just lost his choo choo. And it was our job to cheer him up...whatever. POP was great by the way...for once Rev. Fart had nothing to say and her royal highny was too busy on the phone to care about anyone. Finally some peace and quiet. They didn't even come to meals for a while, which meant that we could actually eat! Specially since so many people had left in the night, there was lots of food left over for those of us still thinking it could all be fixed.

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