tomtuttle1

Mellowtripper, you just write me. Just write The Creature, Box 328, New Knockswille, Ohio, 45871. He that hungers after Part II should work in the 24 hr WOW burger stand.

I was not running, as ye suppose, seeing it was but the 5th hour of our day. But the internal alarm doesn't let me sleep too late. I've been working out of town for over a year now & have to leave very early, get home late, which also is why I don't post as frequently as I used to. Has nothing to do with the 44 crucified with Christ (see "Are You Limiting God, Part II").

God love mah pee-puls. Welcome home to our prodigal brother, who Simonion has ordained a just man. Nika, great news about your mother. TomTomDotCom, Rockme, Rhinisimo, my beloved Sexie, the professor and Gilligan, great to see your words of wit and wisdom. I hardly have no greater joy than to see mah peeples standing in the gap for me while I pefect works in the flesh for my earthly, sensual and devilish clients. Isn't God good??!!!!! Ya know, yesterday mah wife told me I could tie her up and do ANYTHING I wanted to. Know what I did?? Asked for more vacation. No!! No!!! A thousand times NO!!!! I tied her up, then I went golfing. Bless your hearts, I'm glad I don't get paid for mah sto-ries... Simon, have those open sores healed yet??

Per Fellowstripper's admonition, I will say on. I have dreamed a dream, and in it was a cloud the size of a man's hand. And that I was the star of that movie. Oh, I get confused, maybe it was just a song I heard. In any case, I just wanted to share how blessed I was that just how you all have just kept this tread just running and running (laleo) in my absence and stuff. How beauteeful are your feets, all of ya's. Jesus I know, and Paul I know...

Happy B-day Sexie, O young & firm one!!! Party tonight, top floor Wirewilly, 7PM, which means 6:50PM corps time!!!! Bring Mal packs and Jethro Kloss high enema tool kit. Simon, you man the beer wagon. We're so glad that you were born Cause if you were not here We'd never see your smiling face Or hear your voice if cheer It's hard to say "God bless you" To someone who don't exist But if the Lord should tarry We'll be singing to you next year Love, love, love mah birthday gal!!

Beware what you say as touching these men (where was all this "touching" when we were in res??). For if this bantering be of God, you can do nothing, lest haply you be found to fight even against God. These are not drunken, as you suppose. That jimmy swagger you observe is Godly assurance. Knowing this FIRST..... Speaking of Spanish outreach, if I ever move to a latin country, I'm gonna change mah name to Tomas De Jesus.

The Kenyon-scrubbing episode was actually with a small wire brush AND a toothbrush, and Mah Main Man Harvey got the wire brush. The Men of God knew that I would see the intricate detail of each piece of stone or brick and its need for single-bristle scouring. I had beads of perspiration teaming on my upper lip area from the intense brushing I was administering. Even tempest-driven dirt or snow couldn't adhere to the sterling finish of those stones after I finished with them. I also scrubbed bricks out on some field just outside town. The townie owner had a brick house knocked down and had offered the bricks to the way c of e. David Thomas and I froze our butts off "bristling the bricks" for maany afternoons, returning for a deliciously fulfilling dinner of salad or a half baked potato. I had the blessing also of taking old metal bunk bed frames out of the pool in Allen Gym and setting them up in some of the dorms. Must have been for the room-mates of the married corps... I forget what our hourly wage was back then, seems like nothing today...

And speaking of Fart, as if Corps Nite wasn't dreary enough by itself, it seemed like EVERY Corps Nite most of the corps would expell the natural byproduct of the food eaten that day.... in vapor form. I suppose those who stood up to stay awake were luckily not sitting near the fumigators. Hey, that would have been a great twig name... The Fumigators... Anyways, it is IMPOSSIBLE to sleep when your sinuses are singed and your eyes "melted". I believe this is what Craiggy meant when he spoke about "face melting"... Corps nights were as spiritual as bingo night for the elderly, just not as exciting. I can count on ONE finger the number of TRUE CORPS who really seemed to look forward to "Wednesday Night... Top Floor Wierwilly". I remember Exie on corps nites, she NEVER paid attention, playin' footsie with people around her. At least SHE gave me something to do, giving me the appearance of having interest...

The parable of the one-eyed snake is this: The one-eyed snake IS the Big Texan. Crocky, keep your head outta the gutter. Why, I hadn't heard such vile terminology since walking in front of Kenyon and hearing a familiar spirit voice say "How the .... are you, *** dammit!!" We're Kristons here, not sailors. I would they were even cut off which trouble you. And mah Sexie, of course I meant our own Martha Sherman. Is there any other?? Hope she's using ash trays now...

... and I got real thankful that I hadn't slept with Steve Ransom.

Seems like days since I last read up on the 9th and their companions in trouble... Were any of you guys REALLY in the 9th corps?? As for LEAD, I got that confused with the LEAD pronounced 'LED' . I thought we were to be LED to that city with its streets of gold, children laughing children singing with the happy angel band. Never happened. I did however get to go LEAD last week. The new location was the Bahamas. And a cruise ship for mah hootch. Wifey is working for Carnival & can get cruises for next to nuthin. Anyways, got a few stingrays converted and taught Christian Ettiquette at the dinner table. People were so blessed, you should have seen the expressions on their faces, like God himself opened unto them a beer. Gotta go to a Crusty Trustee meeting. Mah love and greets to our new babes, as well as us pillows of the truth. Sexie, hows come we can't track down Martha?

The most observable ethic was, to me, that being merciful, kind, gracious, etc... was a sign of weakness. The more abusive, callous and uncaring you were, they stronger you were perceived.

I am just seeing the new Gspot for the 1st time, and I gotta say someone's been spending a lot of time in secular technology. Too hi-tech for me... It's great to see you guys and gals keeping young at heart, diving, sky diving, eating, etc. As the Word says, "The people sat down to eat, and rose up to play".

And ef. u. c. k. (if you see Kay), tell her I miss her... Too bad Saddan never took PLAF.... Hang in there, buddy!!! Happy New Year mah Peoples!!

Yes indeedy friends, the happy day is here. Why, if I were a southern penguin, I'd be happy feet. Giving = (Believing + Receiving * Serving) / Standing... Mathematical axioms we must adhere to... One happy day, so maany maany years ago, me and mah earthy and earthly siblings couldn't decide on what fine gift we could give to mah father in the world. We saw a rather unique item somewhere, and wrapped it up & stuck it under the Xmas George Bush. Mah creative universalism in the world (fodder) opened it to find a roll of toilet paper upon which it was written, "Cheap Toilet Paper - For Cheap A**Holes". He loved it!!! Isn't God good?? Merry Christmas you guys & gals of the 9th. Sexie, maany hugs this fine day. Love love love, mah peoples ...

You have rightly judged (glen ortho-judgemounta), our Strange brother. It indeed was a veesion that I should return booms-quick. My HOPE and WISH is that we all would be LUCKY enough to have a great CHRISTMAS and New Year. My absence is due to the principle of feast or famine. Either too much work and no time, or too little work and no CIF (rubbles, sheckles, dinars, pesos, dabloons, ducatos, ching). So I hereby ordain Tom Stranger in the night to be chief amongst you. Tom, git to crackin'!!! Be a doulos, run to swerve, checkup from the neckup, be all you can be, until such a time as I can requit of this mah labor night and day. Merry Christmas to all of you. And don't get tricked by your families. Remember, you need to be back here Jan1 for the 5pm service. In Florida, Tuts

That sounds like a delicious hot meal. Try some flap jacks also... Prayers for Nika Tica, dancin' is in the forecast. Happy B-day Mr. Rockster. Prayin' also for snow in the FL Keys. Isn't God good?? Sexie, all things are available to HIM that believeth. Too bad you are a female. And the Verd says to be imitators of HIM; I'd like to see you try THAT one!!

Beold, how great a fire a little matter kindleth. I would they were even cut off...

Too bad Simon you don't play golf. Last weekend I was playing with an old high school (what hi-skule you go to??) friend. I hit a good drive but lost sight of it. I said to him "Damm!! I hit that really well - but my eyesight isn't what it used to be. Did you see where the ball went??". He responded "My eyesight is still exceptionally good, I saw it just fine. Saw right where it went." So I said to him "Okay then, where did it go?" He says "I forget." So last night I was in a bar, sat next to 3 beautiful blondes. I asked the one next to me if she'd like to hear a blonde joke. She says "I am 5'8 and a body builder. My friend here is 5'10 and is a professional wrestler. My other friend is 5'11 and has a martial arts black belt. Are you sure you want to tell us a blonde joke?" I said "Yeah, you're right. I don't want to have to explain it three times..." Toodles!!!

Simon: you are my Niatross and Storm Damage you are my wheel in the middle of a wheel you are my motion with devotion you are my cheese wedge you are my neuthetic counsellor and as the prophet Samuel and "The Doctor" would say, "YOU are the man!!!!" You jesus christ so and so

You have judged corectly, Exie... I did spend maany hours, just working that lil' brush on the outter walls, just sos I could present that building without spot and without blemish. Guess who was my co-worker??? The now-famous HarveY. We filled the air with a thick cloud of cigatette smoke while brushing in the spirit... I don't need pics. I ginosko every square centimeter ...

Happy B-day to Simon, and all of his friends, spiritually. Nothing better than and aging ole' drunken sailor... Sexie, is it wrong to conjur up stimulating images in mah mind upon viewing the halloweenie pic you posted?? Simon, one word of wisdom on this your b-day... You can be old, and you can be poor, but don't be BOTH...

I have no greater joy than to hear my children walk in confusion... So as not to miss ANY B-day of ANY of these our people, just as Simon redeemed the time by lifting the lift list, Happy B-day to all of us this year. May applebutter & pea soup abound.

Like the Jardiner, I also have been a travelin'. So's it is quite nice to return and see cocky Rocky back within the fold, our own prodigal son. Quick, fetch him the finest garment and make ready the fatted lamb, for this our brother hath come home.

That's a good question - why DID he nap?? Gee, I don't remember getting too many naps... To me, it fringes on IDULTRY. Did he ever go to TEENIE, NM, for LEAD?? Did he ever get more than a level Lay-Dul full of barley at sup-per?? Did he ever FEESH in the river?? Was his life REP-RE-SENT-TA-TIVE of the rest of the corps?? A got a problen with this...