Jump to content
GreaseSpot Cafe

A mind is a terrible thing to waste


GrouchoMarxJr
 Share

Recommended Posts

Ok everybody, open your song books to "What a friend we have in Victor"...but first, who would like to open up with a word of memorized cliches and ritualistic phrases?

Tonight's teaching is entitled "Bend over and give us your money"...

...but first we need to have mana-infestations...Larry, would speak with your tongue and then lie to us?...ok, how about a word of propensity?...someone?...C'mon oldyman, spit it out...edify us and encourage us to a more worthy cadaver.

and tonight's announcements:

1-There will be a room search at midnight to see who's been signing checks to a mortage company

2-This Friday evening we will be going to the mall to recruit more people into the more abounding life

3-There will be a sign up sheet to see who can use the restroom

4-Anyone caught with a pet will be marked and deleted

5-and finally...We will be passing around the loyalty oath letter that you must sign in order to enter the back of the motorcoach...

...and don't forget, this weeks blue form must include your whereabouts for the last 10 days, and if you did not attend the monthly seminar, "how to stop thinking and start believing what we say", you must immediately give us 15% of all that is in your billfold or Hank will not spit on your shoes.

Thank you all for coming...Hank bless you all, you are truly the best of who's in this room tonight.

Will someone please close with a word of memorized drivel and then we will sing "yes it is Victor"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

What!??? There's no purge? No Holy crusade? What about all the homos? The announcements aren't complete without spittle cast in the name of the Lord in a stand against the unholy union...

"Unholy union"? You talking 'bout the Carpenters union or something?

Can I hand out umbrella's?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

meka, meka slamajama, shisto. Part 1 completed.

Groucho, you're funny. (That's the interpretation). Part 2 completed.

Anything else I can do to serve you? :)

Serving? Did you mention serving? Does that include bisquits and gravy?

I am back from the bay...me, Notta and my sister shark have eaten half the crab in the bay so now its time for breakfast!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

meka, meka slamajama, shisto. Part 1 completed.

Groucho, you're funny. (That's the interpretation). Part 2 completed.

Anything else I can do to serve you? :)

Larry, you were out of fellowship... you didn't go far enough in your tongues and you forgot "Shama lamma ding dong."

Which means... you didn't go far enough in your interpretation...

You must be out of fellowship. :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Larry, you were out of fellowship... you didn't go far enough in your tongues and you forgot "Shama lamma ding dong."

Which means... you didn't go far enough in your interpretation...

You must be out of fellowship. :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh:

:) Well, if you've got a problem with my tongues and interpretation take it up with management. Freely I have received -- freely I have given and what do I get for my service -- whining. ;)

Hey Eyes! Good to see you back. Did all that crab you ate make you fat and sassy? :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:) Well, if you've got a problem with my tongues and interpretation take it up with management. Freely I have received -- freely I have given and what do I get for my service -- whining. ;)

Hey Eyes! Good to see you back. Did all that crab you ate make you fat and sassy? :)

I'd get out of the water if I were you ....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:) Well, if you've got a problem with my tongues and interpretation take it up with management. Freely I have received -- freely I have given and what do I get for my service -- whining. ;)

Hey Eyes! Good to see you back. Did all that crab you ate make you fat and sassy? :)

Ok I'm confused...didn't Dooj steal the wine from Bumpy? So is she now dispensing that which she has stolen? How very Christian of her!

Crab...make me fat and sassy? Never! I say again... Never! I was fat and sassy long before I ate all that crab! :biglaugh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:) Maybe we're re-living the Tower of Babel event. No one is speaking the same language.

:biglaugh: Ok. Let me rephrase that. Did it make you fatter and sassier? ;)

Heavens no! I'm a lean, mean, interpreting machine! And sassier, because of the crab? No...probably from the Mojito's tho!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

An additional announcement...

...All adulterous activities and sexual perversions must be confined to those of the same gender unless your name happens to be Rosie or Donna. Did someone mention crabs?...

Well, as long as you put it that way...

I'm gonna wake up my sharky pal and tell her it's time to come out and play. :biglaugh:

All the crabs are gone... She's gonna want to eat something more substantial now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Really.. if you substituted "the loyster" for "victor" in Groucho's little "fellowship".. I don't see any embellishment.

I remember how "they" praised loy's name.. the bringer of new light.. slayer of debils.. mark and avoider of da unfaithful.. worthy of our praise and support..

and it got worse after I left..

yep.. loy.. the purger of homos.. god's vengeance on those in debt, and "weak"..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

An additional announcement...

...All adulterous activities and sexual perversions must be confined to those of the same gender unless your name happens to be Rosie or Donna. Did someone mention crabs?...

I've been told that this could, and I do mean Could be something that I might call a good time.

But, I have also been told that sharks don't care much about what they "Eat". And yet again...I have also been told that I'm a finicky little shark.

Hmmmmmm.....Makes you wonder, don't it? :unsure:

Edited by Eyesopen
Link to comment
Share on other sites

An additional announcement...

...All adulterous activities and sexual perversions must be confined to those of the same gender unless your name happens to be Rosie or Donna. Did someone mention crabs?...

Apparently, I am IN FELLOWSHIP today. Lucky ducky that I am! Woo hoo!!! Guess I'd better buy a lotto ticket! :eusa_clap::confused::thinking::rolleyes::biglaugh: <_<

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...