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Walking on Water with Chris


Juan Cruz
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from DMiller:

quote:
Did someone mention walking on water?

I do it all the time (especially when it is frozen, and goes by the name of ice)!

Of course you have to wait until it is winter, but ice is still water, and easier to walk on than water in the summer.

I never did master walking on *puddles* first (like CG from Gartmoor suggested back in the mid 80's) as a way of learning to walk on a larger *liquid* body of water though.

edited to correctly quote Dmiller - sorry!

Response:

CG has obssesed about 'walking on water' for along time.

Given his personality, it's a good thing I figgur, that he didn't obsess on raising maidens from the dead.*

Walking on water was just right; a safe CG activity for all of us. All he got was all wet(er).

*CG: "Excuse me sir, do you run this funeral home?"

Edited by Juan Cruz
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FHD: Why yes, I do. Can I help you?

CG: Well, I'm not here to take business away from you but... Here's $20.00 if you'll permit me into your embalming room for half an hour.

FHD: That's a highly irregular request, I must say. I'm afraid I can't allow it.

CG: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you. I'm the new hairdresser. Shirley couldn't make it this week.

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CG: I'm on my way. Can you tell me, sir? Where do you get the bodies from?

FHD: The familes call us and we pick them up from the hospital, home, nursing establishment or morgue.

CH: Oh, thanks for your time. God's richest blessings to you in the wonderful name of our risen Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

FHD: I'm Jewish.

CG: Oh, so am I. It's in Romans. Let me show you...

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CG; (at the morgue) Hi, what's your name?

CC: How did you get in here?

CG: I was looking for the soda machine. Say, do you like working here?

CC: It's quiet.

CG: Gee, that was a shame about those two girls. Are they here? I hear the boy was driving almost 100 miles per hour.

CC: Look if you're not authorized you have to leave.

CG: OK. Gosh, my shoes are wet, mind if I sit on this bench a second? ... One of those girls was wearing a bracelet that belonged to my daughter.

CC: You would havae to see the desk sargeant about that.

CG: OK, but I don't want to go to the trouble if she's not wearing it. May I check?

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quote:
from DMiller:

quote:

What was with CG and "walking on water?!" He talked about that going all the way back to the earliest 70's. I heard him at the old Way East HQ.

I gotta go hmmmmmmmmm.

I never said that.

Or did you put what you wanted to say, in place of what I said about CG, and his teaching about walking on puddles??

If that is what happened -- I forgive you. icon_smile.gif:)-->

David

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quote:
Did someone mention walking on water? icon_confused.gif:confused:--> wink2.gif;)-->

I do it all the time (especially when it is frozen, and goes by the name of ice)!

Of course you have to wait until it is winter, but ice is still water, and easier to walk on than water in the summer. icon_biggrin.gif:D-->

I never did master walking on *puddles* first (like CG from Gartmoor suggested back in the mid 80's) as a way of learning to walk on a larger *liquid* body of water though.

FYI --- this is what I wrote.

David

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quote:
When you say "cats", is that referring to the feline type, or "hip or cool people"? Either way do you literally mean "Killed"?

If I remember correctly, neither vic nor loy appreciated the presence of unclaimed ***** cats on headquarters grounds.

I think they called Chr*s "The Terminator" to perform a "necessary" but otherwise messy job..

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CG: Intensive Care unit please.

Are you a relative of a patient there?

CG: Yes, my younger sister is critically ill.

What’s her name?

CG: Talitha Kumai

I’m sorry I don’t see that name here.

CG: Well, she sometimes uses other names..can I just speak to one of the nurses at the nursing station?

…

(CG ducks into Men’s room and puts on clergy collar)

As he approaches the nursing station he pauses to eye a mop bucket, then proceeds on…

CG: Hi, I’m today’s Eucharistic Minister. I’ll just be delivering holy communion to the inmates this morning.

The WHAT, Father?

CG walks slowly past each room, pausing occasionally to read the charts hanging outside the doors, muttering things like:

“Wow, that’s a lot of urine.”

“How come they don’t say if they’re virgin?”

Excuse me, Father? Can I help you?

CG: Oh, oh, blessings to you in the wonderful name of our risen Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ!

I’m Muslim.

CG: Well, I’m sort of trying to bring the mountain to the bedside here, know what I mean? Say, I was supposed to deliver communion to a young girl that was very seriously ill. I forget her name, she still here?

I’m sorry, she passed away last night.

CG: Saints preserve us! I’ll just go deliver last rites.

Father you know, of course, that Last Rights went out with Vatican 2. [she opens the window.]

CG: I know, but some of us can't get used to the new language. Well, allow me to go Anoint the Sick.

But Father, she DIED.

CG: Well she needs SOMETHING to get her blessed soul into the grave properly where she can sleep awaiting the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord, when all the dead in Christ shall rise and meet Him in the air and at the bema and claim her inheritance for which all her earthly spiritual blessings were just a foretaste of glory divine!

CG: You’re not really a priest, are you.

CG departs the ICU, stepping in the mop bucket on his way out

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