Sushi

Not really a joke, but, here goes.... Age and treachery will always win out over youth and skill.

Would that be GEORGE Strait?

I was wondering, OKC, did you write that, or did you cut and paste it? If you wrote it, congrats, it was rather amusing. If not, well, it was still amusing.

If I had a nickel for everytime I heard this one, on an uneventful Saturday........ Knock, Knock. Who's there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, silly, cows go MOO, OWLS go WHO.

QUOTE(fooledagainII @ Jun 6 2008, 07:00 AM) I have some things I alway wanted to know and figured this would be the best place to post. How was the war fought in heaven? Oakspear: By masturbation So, Oakspear, was it a circle jerk or a 'garden' variety sword fight? :blink:

Yes, and I wish I hadn't.

Obviously, the first name should be Alice (of Honeymooner's fame).

Uh, Garth, didn't they have to call the fire department to put out the candles at YOUR last birthday? :blink:

Thanks, Kit. I received my first two advanced manuals yesterday, "Humorously Speaking" (surprise, surprise) and "Interpersonal Communication" along with my certificate of completion. I can't wait for the weekend to get a frame to put it in. It will be prominently displayed in the living room. I'm also waiting for my new nametag (for those reading this, no, it won't be like a WC nametag. I'll still remember the little people who got me there ).

I tell that one from time to time, I think it's better as an oral joke. Only, I say an Irish pub, and "Where's the bar tender?" VERY few people get it.

Uh, no thanks, Shell. I have enough problems now. I don't need to be parading them on national TV.

Let's not forget the other guys who take on instant families. They also toil away at the duties of fatherhood. They too, are worthy of our appreciation.

Glad you liked it, exc. Helped a bit when I heard it too.

Maybe this will help. HERE!

Thank you all, I've reached the age of spiritual perfection.

Thank you, all. WD, I always wondered something about that group? If ya get the speech wrong do you get to keep toasting until you get it right? Yes, until you run out of bread.

Not to toot my own horn (but if I don't, no one else will ), but as of June 3, 2008, I finished the Toastmasters Basic Communication Manual. That is the one where you give ten speeches of 5-7 minutes in front of your fellow Toastmasters and are evaluated on them, each one focusing on a different aspect of speech performance. I now am able to put a couple of letters after my name (C.C.).I suppose I could have done it before, but it would have been without Toastmasters International's imprimatur. It is to be hoped, I will be able to start a speech coaching business, with the letters lending credibility. In other Toastmaster related news, I was elected Vice President of Education for my club. It was a landslide victory, since I was running unopposed. I am excited about this, since it means I will be an integral part of the club's success for the coming year. If you have any qualms about public speaking, I would highly recommend finding a Toastmaster's club in your area and jumping in with both feet. Or, putting a toe in the water. However which way you do it, just DO it. HERE!

Classic Hap. Let's remember, the US has the phrase 'One nation UNDER God'' it does not say EQUAL to Him.

For some, it's their personality or looks.

Congrats, Cath, yer doin good AND well.

Religion and homosexuality are very similar in this respect. I don't care if you do it, just don't shove it down MY throat.

Wow, I'm on a roll. Two, count em, TWO comments in as many days on something I posted.

The relevant part is at 6:18, however, enjoy the whole thing.

*****POSTED BY ABIGAIL********** I forgot Sushi logged back in. Yes, I do. Most Christian and many non-Christian religions teach sex outside of marriage is a sin. Why then, would any non married person need birth control, except to use it while committing a sin? You do realize, Jen, that there are Christians who believe the use of birth control is sin. There are some Jewish people who have similar views towards birth control. I don't want either group dictating such laws to me. I don't wish to have any religious group dictate civil laws to me. From a religious standpoint, I will follow those creeds that fit with my own religious beliefs, but I will not impose those upon another.

I'm probably wasting my time here, but here's a moment to perhaps lighten things up. As usual, there is adult language and content.