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Shorter Plots


Raf
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Here's the deal. Figure out a humorous way to make some of your favorite movies/plays as short as possible.

Examples:

Star Wars: A New Hope

Act One, Scene II

"An escape pod just launched. No life signs aboard."

"Well, blow it up anyway. Better safe than sorry."

*****

Waiting for Godot

Act One, Scene I

Enter Godot

*****

Edited by Raf
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Oh, K.

:)

Scream

Scene One:

A phone rings four times. Then a click...

"You've reached the Becker residence. No one is available to take your call. Please leave a message at the sound of the tone. Thank you."

Beeeeeeeep.

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Was that too literal?

48 hours

Scene One

On a stake out; car littered with dunkin donut coffee cups and donut boxes.

Reggie Hammond: How long was I asleep?

Jack Cates: Two days...

I know, I know and I'm not even blonde (no offense anyone!)

:)

Edited by karmicdebt
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Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

Act I, Scene I.

"How strange!

You-Know-Who's dead body was found right next to little Harry Potter!"

==============

Or

Act I, Scene I.

"What's all the celebrating about?"

"Have you heard?

You-Know-Who's dead!

James Potter and Sirius Black caught him in a crossfire!

The Ministry's still examining his body."

==============

The Lord of the Rings

Act One, Scene I

In the fires of Mount Doom

Elrond: "Isildur! Cast the ring into the fire!"

Isildur: "Okay!"

Not as short.

"Fellowship of the Ring", at the Council in Rivendell of all

the races on Middle-Earth.

"What will we do with the ring?"

"Gandalf will hitch a ride on Gwahir, the Wind Lord (that big bird.)

He'll carry the thing in a sack, and release the sack

once they're over Mount Doom!"

"All right then!

If all goes well, we can defeat Sauron before dinnertime!"

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Excellent!

Sharon, the object is to cut the plot off before it starts, not just to summarize it.

Example:

West Side Story

Tony and Maria meet at the dance.

Tony: "Spic."

Maria: "Wop."

Sleepless in Seattle

Meg Ryan sits in a car changing stations.

"I hate talk radio. Wonder if the Flap Jackson show is playing any Pearl Jam."

24

Season One

Jack: "Nina, can you take that meeting? I really need to get some sleep."

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Lincoln

Mary Todd: Are you sure you don't want to go to the play?

Abe: Yup.

--------------------

JAWS

Baby shark is caught in a tuna fishermen's net.

-------------------

Stand By Me

Let's go see a dead guy!

Pull my finger.

Leeches suck.

Let's go home.

------------------------

The Lost Boys

The non-vampires eat shrimp scampi for supper and have no worries because of their uber-garlic breath.

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Back To The Future

Marty: "unh...why did I set the alarm for midnight for?....zzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

Clerks

Dante: "H*ll NO I won't come in...I'm not supposed to be there today!"

National Lampoon's Summer Vacation

Clark Griswold: "Hoooneeeeyyy...I just heard on the radio that Wally World is closed for repairs..."

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Chekhov (before beaming down): "Keptin, I remember this planet..."

Edited by Oakspear
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Back To The Future

Marty: "unh...why did I set the alarm for midnight for?....zzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

National Lampoon's Summer Vacation

Clark Griswold: "Hoooneeeeyyy...I just heard on the radio that Wally World is closed for repairs..."

I like those.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

Chekhov (before beaming down): "Keptin, I remember this planet..."

You hit on an old complaint of that movie, which I wasn't thinking of.

They're doing an astronomical survey, and didn't account for all

the planets? Plus, entering the system, they didn't pull up any

summary that said "Ceti Alpha 5 is a prison island."

So, my shorter movie might have been...

"Retrieving the system's data now. Holy Hannah! Check out the news on

Ceti Alpha 5! Maybe we'd better skip the entire SYSTEM!"

"No-let's just survey the system from space, and record the details.

Hm-seems to be one planet MISSING. Send a message to Starfleet

security with the data attached, and the notice on Ceti Alpha 5.

They'll want to send someone to look into this."

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