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The subjectivity of gaslighting doesn’t make it any less real. One’s perception of reality becomes distorted over time. The manipulation is subtle, incremental, imperceptible. The victim or target or (choose a word) does not actively participate in the way you seem to suggest. The manipulated cannot or does not see he is participating in being manipulated. Or, if he does see it, he has been manipulated not to trust what he sees. That’s why it’s called manipulation. And it is psychologically violent abuse. The subjective perception of others choosing to blame the victim or target or (choose a word) compounds and perpetuates this abuse. This victim blaming is unintentional gaslighting by the (choose a word) blamer. But when one finally wakes up to what is going on (see Waysider’s post), one can freely take back one’s lost sanity. One can break out of the psychological prison. We do choose our behavioral responses to emotions. The manipulated don’t realize they are making these choices. When the veil is lifted, when we are awakened by the lightning strike, we start to see this, and we start to change our choices and behavior. Sanity is lost, destroyed. Not leveraged - correction.

Any answer where you don’t randomly attack concepts people are sharing and ridiculing them and their life story they published would be a good start.

This sort of thing is what happened to me. One day, in FellowLaborers, I found myself all alone in the house for some reason. I happened to look in a full length mirror and, just like that, like a bolt of lightning, a feeling of self-awareness came over me as I found myself asking, "How the hell did I get here?". Now, I don't mean I couldn't remember arriving or the trip there. I mean I suddenly wondered how my life could have evolved so drastically without me noticing. I realized I wasn't the same person I had been before I got involved with The Way. Not just a little different, but like a completely different person. My bridges to return were gone, vanished. It's not a good feeling. I started to silently question everything that was happening. If only I had paid closer attention to what was unfolding, life might have been very different. Would it have been better? Would it have been worse? Who's to say. But, for sure, it would have been much different.

Ahh...Charge of the Light Bridage....may as well let Iron Maiden contribute...

Hello Belle! Long time no see! "Over 900 Way Ambassadors" - could well mean 900 in those African countries - and an exciting TWO in the good ole USA, where doncha know it, the Word is really moving. As Nathan says: Only good thing I can find to say about this article is: they seem to have dropped the phrase "international countries" in favour of "other countries." Maybe they read our humorous comments here at the Cafe?

Is it available to question things without being a grade A douchebag?

Umm that would be empathy. It is not simply a cult weapon it is also one of Jesus greatest characteristics taught and lived.

I read what you wrote here. It sounds completely without empathy. It sounds like you refuse to acknowledge the ties that family, friends, marriages, and long time associations produce by nature of those relationships existing. Sure at any time any of us could have escaped the bondage we endured by refusing at that moment to accept the false authority usurped by tyrants, cutting ties and leaving. So what? I find your example comparing this to hitting yourself in the hand repeatedly to be very inaccurate as well as triggering and judgmental. Ties formed by family and choices aren’t easily reversed. You can’t just wave your hand like they never existed. But that’s you so it’s par for the course.

"If you leave now, the adversary will have free reign to harm your family." (or so we are told, as Advanced Class grads.)