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Pay no attention to shiftthis. He has the credibility of a chia pet. (No offense to chia pets.) I wish you well with your situation.

Taxidev: Elizabeth’s story is very moving – thanks for sharing that link…I was especially struck by her attitude after the ordeal – inspired by her mom’s advice to NOT let the kidnappers and all she went through for 9 months continue to have a hold on her; another amazing thing she talked about was forgiveness – and that it really was something for herself…she didn’t elaborate a whole lot on that point – but the relevancy to this thread really got me! Setting aside the contrast of her situation and former cult-followers (she was kidnapped vs folks who voluntarily join a cult – though at the time they may not have been aware of that) - - I think that forgiving oneself (whatever that may mean to you) is a large part of breaking the hold a cult may have had on the person; for me forgiveness meant not beating myself up for all the dumb decisions I'd made and all the dumb things I accepted without exercising any critical thinking skills. == == == Grace: I love it when you share details of your journey – exercising your critical thinking skills to not buy into everything while you were involved in TWI – but instead taking charge of your destiny – joining the Navy; I’m with you on your great point – to be thankful for the good people that I’d met in TWI; those sweet relationships were one of the toughest things we had to go against when we started thinking about leaving - see my comments to Rocky below. == == == Rocky: You’ve got some tremendous points on social ties and emotional support; Skyrider has started a number of great threads on the social ties – both the good and bad aspects of social ties; for me, one of the factors that weighed heavily in whether or not to leave TWI was the fear of losing contact with all of our friends…and in thinking about what I said to Grace, maybe there was a little bit of the Stockholm Syndrome in the way I felt torn about TWI. In ’86 my wife and I were pretty much the only ones who left our corps – it wasn’t until some years later that I was aware of a few others leaving; it’s not like we didn’t make an effort to reach out to our corps brethren and sistren - we were writing letters and even made some phone calls – but alas – we were on our own; the emotional support would have been nice – if folks weren’t so stuck in that mindset of thinking we were possessed, tricked by the devil, tripped out - - or all of the above - and more!...of course the emotional support from Grease Spot folks is a tremendously healing thing ! == == ==

That's certainly a big part of it. Perhaps another major reason was the sense of belonging we had as a part of what the cult labeled the "household of God." For many years before and during my time in TWI, I couldn't figure out why people stayed in denominational Christian churches that had glaring major flaws. They often overlooked those flaws because of their "tribe." They had people they felt comfortable with, they felt they belonged.

Rocky, excellent post! I know the GSC, has helped me move on with my life. I know my time in the TWI, left me with a lot of questions; why did I put up with so much Donkey Dung, for so many years. I think that the GSC has helped my process my time with that cult. Quite honestly, I had some great times in TWI, and met some wonderful people, for which I am thankful. However, now I know that I had to deal with a lot of Bullsheet also. For example, there was a lot of pressure, to ABS, and go WOW, and Corps, even when it was not in my best interest to do so. I took the AC, and it was a huge waste of time, and money. But, I felt a lot of pressure to take it, so I did. Big mistake on my part, but it was a learning experience for me. When I was finally ready to join the Navy, Brenda H from the 14th Corps, wanted me to go WOW again, and I told her, I wasn't going to go again, once was more than enough. So instead of going WOW, or Corps, I joined the Navy. For me, it was a good decision. But, I know from reading the GSC, many people regret the years they spent in TWI; they could have used those years getting an education, or building their careers. They will never get those years back. Rocky, I think most of us stayed in TWI, because we loved God, and wanted to live a Godly life. However, VPW and his inner circle, lived ungodly lives, and destroyed those around them.

It IS relevant. But we mustn't judge whether others are as able as Elizabeth S to move on and take charge of their emotional destiny. Thanks for sharing the link. I dare say that most of us who have been here at Greasespot Cafe HAVE moved on and no longer allow twi to control our lives, our moods, our interactions with others. But it's a process that takes different times for each individual. One thing Elizabeth had and has is strong family ties with tremendous emotional support. That's one of the things GSC can help with to some extent.

That's because there was a concerted effort to conceal the inner workings. It didn't simply go unnoticed. As you said, it was purposely hidden. Hidden with threats of expulsion for thinking evil thoughts of your brother or sister, threats of retaliation for exposing the nefarious actions of leadership, threats of the devil consuming you if you should dare to ever venture outside the wall of protection. And perhaps the worst of all, threats of God refusing to "spit in your direction" if you should be so bold as to withhold your *abundant sharing. Better watch out! You'll be a grease-spot in the road by midnight. *Way-speak for obligatory tithe.

Let's boil the cabbage down, shall we? We were The Way's sales force. No salary, no commissions, just ridicule and chastisement if we failed to meet sales quotas. It's important to understand that PFAL was not the main product. PFAL and the accompanying series of classes were the enticement The real product, or goal, if you prefer, was to find people who would faithfully donate 10, 15, 20% (or more) of their income... paycheck after paycheck, month after month and year after year. Yes, they made a profit on the classes, but it was chump change compared to a lifetime of handing over your hard earned cash. It was a scam, folks. The sooner someone comes to grips with that realization, the more time and resources they have left to rise back up from the rubble. Sunk Cost Fallacy

Perhaps one of the most insidious aspects of TWI’s indoctrination was to instill (by a gradual but firm process) in followers a deep trust in wierwille. This is rather obvious even in PFAL, where wierwille worked so hard to convince students to suspend critical thinking. With his silly notion that the Bible prohibits private interpretation he asserts the Bible actually interprets itself, thus laying the groundwork for students to firmly believe that what wierwille taught was the ONLY CORRECT or AUTHORIZED interpretation of the Bible, the Scriptures, the Word, or whatever you want to call it. Given that even the simplest definition of “interpretation” is explanation, clarification, analysis, and evaluation – for one to claim that the Bible interprets itself is absurd! Folks may not still be in TWI but they may still be held captive in the bizarro-fundamentalist mindset wierwille instilled in them. It was merely a mental sleight-of-hand via wierwille’s charisma, logical fallacies, cobbled together plagiarism, and the unabashed incompetency of a narcissistic zealot that he got a lot of folks to think he was giving them a true understanding of the scriptures. I think that the more one’s misplaced trust of wierwille grew – the more wierwille’s subterfuge agenda took root in the person – like being intertwined. Perhaps a cult leader’s power is in part derived from the followers – their misplaced trust helps to cement the bond – or whatever “hold” the cult leader has on them… The depth and degree of wierwille’s “hold” on followers varied – for numerous reasons besides length and depth of involvement with The Way, since we are all individual and unique. Like any exploitative cult leader, wierwille was parasitic and he based his “ministry” on deception and manipulation; in the long run however, “holding” onto dedicated followers is unsustainable, in my humble opinion. People get fed up, frustrated, tired of being used and lied to, or they see through the bull$hit of PFAL, or start looking into red flags they’ve known of for a while… or for any number of other reasons – so they leave. Whatever manipulative “hold” TWI had on them is now broken…yeah !!! that’s the best kind of severing ties – when you cut the ties with a false church/family like TWI !!!