Let's see where it lands.
Interesting comments, Hope. Hmmm...maybe. Dunno.
I've always had a ying/yang thing going in my personality. Like, when I was about 11, knee deep in Catholic Parochial education, I decided that being a priest would be cool. I was a fairly serious thinker (then as now I guess) and I figured, "if anyone understands what all this is about, priests do". Kids, huh?
At the same time, same year, I was raisin' serious Cain with my teachers, askin' questions like "why are we so sure there's a heaven"? and "how do we know there's a God"? It got so "bad" that mid year or so the Sistern called my parents in to talk to them about how I was developing "Communist" views...! No kidding, really happened. 11 years old, I'm a communist, right? Pass the vodka!
So here I am, a kid, looking for "answers" and thinking I'll be a priest, and at the same time I was questioning openly the whole religious thing. Later in high school, I met a priest, "Father Donovan", who told me he'd quit high school in Ireland and hitchhiked around Europe for a few years, questioning everything he'd been raised to believe and finally came back to the Catholic faith.
So there he was, and he actually encouraged me to a/question everything and b/definitely wait to even think about being a priest, till I'd had a chance to grow up a little. By then I wasn't interested, (I was surrounded by Catholic girls in pleated skirts!) but it was interesting advice.
So long story longer, I've found I've always been kind of like that. A non-joiner who likes to join things and then try to change them. Doesn't make sense, does it? So now I don't look to join anything. If something comes along I want to be a part of, I do it, but I'm really careful about making committments because I know how I am.
I work hard and heavy on things I believe in but I also know things change - they're supposed to I think. I personally believe that the one thing that doesn't is "love", definable on any number of levels. That's all I'm looking to carry away to the last moment I take a breath. And maybe a hug or two and a nice guitar in hand, if I have my druthers...
I place highest on my list of "things I belong to" my family, our kids, marriage, and friends (which is just about anybody that doesn't try to screw me) and that's about it. "Intangible assets" I guess.
Hmmm...nother long post, not much said. But it's something...let's all sing a song...