Pirate1974

It's a few days late for April Fool but this just has to be a joke. It can't be for real, or can it? A British website called Life Style Extra is reporting that Indian director T. Rajeevnath is planning to make a movie about the life of Mother Theresa and he wants to cast an American actress in the lead role. T. is planning a trip to the U.S. to convince this actress to take on this rather challenging role. And who might this person be who is Rajeevnath's choice to play a Catholic nun who worked among the poorest of the poor of Calcutta for almost 50 years? Paris Hilton. Of course. A perfect choice. I can't imagine anybody who could play this part any better. T. is bringing along several photos of Paris that have been altered to make her appear more like Mother Theresa. Now I would just love to see those. That must be one heck of an alteration job. T.'s people have apparently been in contact with Paris' people to set up a meeting. The website quotes T. as saying, "The pictures will be my strength when I speak to Paris. She has expressed delight that I have short-listed her to play the role. This will make our meeting easier." I'll just bet it will. Now anybody who's seen the cinema classic "The Cat in the Hat" knows that Paris is a top-flight actress. I haven't seen her most famous film but I hear it's available for download on quite a few websites for a modest fee. I understand it doesn't have much dialogue but it's heavy on the action. Now you might think that the fact that Mother Theresa was less than 5 feet tall could be a problem, but if movie magic can make Elijah Wood and Sean Astin into hobbits, this would be a snap. Giving Paris any acting talent may prove a little harder to do. Yeah, I can see it. I think this could definitely work. Next up: "The Life of Pope John Paul II" starring Larry the Cable Guy

There is an art to capturing polar bears. Each Inuit village has a different technique and there is considerable competition between villages in how effective their techniques really are. The most famous village of all had a technique that worked nearly all of the time. The technique stayed a secret until one old gentleman finally told the leaders of the other villages. "The technique," he said, "is to make a large hole in the ice. Then, you must surround the hole with fresh peas. They must be fresh. Canned ones will not work. After this, you wait. When the bear comes up to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole."

Saw the A&E version back in January (?) and thought it was pretty good. Even though you know how it's going turn it out, you still want to see how it all happened. Can't say how accurate it was but it was pretty strong stuff. All the scenes of the people on the plane talking to their families on the ground were pretty hard to watch. I can't see paying to see this one in the theater.

What's the matter, Tom? Don't you like those beautiful shots of the parking lots and the roof of the RCA Dome? I'd like to see the Gators win. UCLA has enough banners.

The guards at the Ross County Jail in Chillicothe, Ohio were quite surprised recently when a shot was fired in one of their holding cells. In the cell was one Victoria Lundy, 41, a fine citizen who had been arrested for participating in a shooting incident in a local bar. Apparently Ms. Lundy was able to smuggle in a firearm when she was invited to be a guest of Chillicothe's finest. How was this possible? Did somebody slack off on their search when Ms. Lundy was checking into her room? Poor law enforcement procedure for sure. Well, maybe not. Perhaps the boys in blue can't be blamed for overlooking this piece of hardware. It seems that Victoria had her piece concealed in...well, let's just say she was able to hide it in a way that no guy would ever be able to do. Obviously it was a small calibre handgun. Either that or...no, let's don't go there. Apparently, according to the testimony of one of her cellmates, when Miss Lundy sat down on a bench in the cell, she went off. I mean, she REALLY went off. Fortunately, I guess, the barrel was pointing in the right direction so that nobody was injured. That must have come as quite a shock to anyone who witnessed it. Gives a whole new meaning to getting banged.

I had Duke, UConn, Boston College and UCLA so I got one out four.

That would be Samoas, and there's no cookie you can buy in any store that's better than those. If they were available all the time, I'd probably weigh 300 pounds.

Anybody pick George Mason to go to the Final Four? :blink:

So it is.

Thank you, sir!! May I have another? Sorry, I've been out of touch for a few days. The body's a temple, that's what we're told I've treated this one like an old honky-tonk

I can't believe that people get so into this that they wouldn't miss a single night of the thing. Just the commercials are like fingernails on a blackboard. I do like Paula Abdul but that's not enough to get me to watch.

Is it Harry Chapin's "Dance Band on the Titanic?"

North Carolina's out too. George Mason? I'd love to know where they found the refs for that game. Tyler Hansborough gets beat up all game and Carolina shoots a total of 4 free throws. Unbelievable. The Tar Heels did a lot better than anybody expected since they lost their top seven players off last year's championship team. They'll be hard to handle next year.

I'd like to say Jake Gyllenhaal for the younger me and Harrison Ford for the older version. The reality is probably closer to Eugene Levy.

Hey, no fair. Tom Strange stole my song!!!

You mean there really was music at the beginning of "Baywatch?" I can't imagine why I never noticed that.

Harvard? What, he couldn't get into ECU? :)

I love the Pirates of the Caribbean. It's my favorite Disney attraction...of course.

Ray, people will come Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come James Earl Jones in "Field of Dreams."

Actually, he was about the only adult in that movie that didn't say, "You'll shoot your eye out." That scene where The Old Man unpacks his "major award" is priceless.

LOS ANGELES - Dennis Weaver, the slow-witted deputy Chester Goode in the TV classic western "Gunsmoke" and the New Mexico deputy solving New York crime in "McCloud," has died. The actor was 81. Weaver died of complications from cancer Friday at his home in Ridgway, in southwestern Colorado, his publicist Julian Myers said.

Very few television characters become pop culture icons - Lucy Ricardo, Archie Bunker, the Fonz, Barney Fife. Don Knotts stopped playing Barney 40 years ago, but just say "Barney Fife" today and everybody knows exactly who that is and what it means. Don Knotts was a true genius in that role. Not many of the old Mayberry folks left any more - Aunt Bea, Helen, Floyd, Howard, Otis, Earnest T. Bass and now Barney are all gone. Gone, but never fogotten as long as TV Land and TBS are still around. I grew up in North Carolina too, and all my relatives in Iowa thought everybody in North Carolina were like the people in Mayberry. At the time, when I was 12 or 13, I was outraged by that idea. Now I think that's not such a bad thing at all.

I'll tell you something that will make you feel old - check out the National Museum of American History in Washington. This is part of the Smithsonian. You know the Smithsonian. It's full of really old stuff like the Wright Brothers plane, Civil War muskets, George Washington's false teeth, like that. Artifacts from the distant past. Well now in the museum you can view such "artifacts" as rotary telephones, manual typewriters, console tvs, record players, Commodore computers, Roy Rogers lunch boxes. That stuff's not ancient enough to reside in a museum exhibit. It's not history. It can't be!! It wasn't that long ago was it? Yeah, I guess it was.

Ice Streaking There's an event I'd like to see Sasha Cohen compete in.