bullying

[cman]

What an excellent source waysider! Thanks.

I do have to caution myself about thinking on this stuff too much.

Cause it will affect me in a bad way.

I try to think of good things and people and that tends to be what is up front in my manner.

Not that I have not done some of these things in all these sources.

I'm guessing most everyone has done 1, 2 or a few.

Doing a dozen or more would be a big problem.

The question is, will we stop and turn it around in our own life.

Cause I know the only mind I can change is my own.

Edited September 9, 2013 by cman

[waysider]

Think about the L.E.A.D. program. The whole thing was based on a foundation of bullying techniques...unrealistic deadlines, unreachable performance goals, belittlement, etc. etc.

Hardly what one should expect of a program that (supposed) is designed to enrich peoples' lives.

[Twinky]

Bullies project their inadequacies, shortcomings, behaviours etc on to other people to avoid facing up to their inadequacy and doing something about it (learning about oneself can be painful), and to distract and divert attention away from themselves and their inadequacies. Projection is achieved through blame, criticism and allegation; once you realise this. every criticism, allegation etc that the bully makes about their target is actually an admission or revelation about themselves. This knowledge can be used to perceive the bully's own misdemeanours; for instance, when the allegations are of financial or sexual impropriety, it is likely that the bully has committed these acts; when the bully makes an allegation of abuse (such allegations tend to be vague and non-specific), it is likely to be the bully who has committed the abuse. When the bully makes allegations of, say, "cowardice" or "negative attitude" it is the bully who is a coward or has a negative attitude.

I endured several face-meltings from Craig, who would have the Corps Coord and maybe a few other henchmen present, and he'd scream at me about my disobedience and "lack of meekness." Heck, all I'd've been doing was something somebody "in authority" over me had told me to do; or it'd been something that appeared completely inoffensive where no direction had been given...nothing of substance or in itself wrong. He terrorised me several times about my "lack of meekness" and also had the CC do the same - the CC did it to be "obedient" but Craig did it to be manipulative. He didn't like that I still had a brain that functioned.

We all know now how "meek to the Word" that rapist and serial abuser of women Craig was.

This is a most interesting thread.

[Allan]

wow, I never knew that Twinky ! I actually had a few laughs with him (LCM) and the mad oirishman country co-ord. from back home was too much of a coward to face melt me

[Twinky]

Allan, in above post, the CC as in Corps Coord.

The CC as in Country Coord didn't try to face-melt me, just to assault me Craig-style. (Y'know, "a man has his needs when he's away from home.")

The only serious face melt from the Country Coord was the last time I saw him when he publicly threw me out.

[Allan]

I understand...majority of them were imbeciles...after we notified our campus co-ord. Pau6 Mosquito we were 'checking out' he pleaded with us to stay, they were going to organize a first ever scholarship for us yada yada...we said "nooooo, we're still leaving" that's when the threats began

[cman]

I have found that hardly anyone wants to know the truth of the situation.

They run from it, avoid it and tell you to stop talking about it.

While my situation is horizontal, (with a bit of vertical) here is some tips about vertical.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Tell-Tale-Signs-of-a-Hostile-Workplace&id=4057797

[waysider]

I have found that hardly anyone wants to know the truth of the situation.

They run from it, avoid it and tell you to stop talking about it.

While my situation is horizontal, (with a bit of vertical) here is some tips about vertical.

http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Tell-Tale-Signs-of-a-Hostile-Workplace&id=4057797

Fellow workers will avoid it for fear of becoming the next target. Human Resources will ignore it if the bully is making profitability numbers look good. In fact, you may find H.R. tends to side with the bully, for that reason. Remember, H.R. does not work for the employees' well-being, they work to protect the interests of the company/organization.

[Ham]

Your boss wouldn't shuffle your meetings or schedules even if he knows that it would have a conflict on your previous appointments.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4057797

I would only add.. if the conflict concerns one's personal safety, for one reason or another..

Personal Care and Emotion is often beat out of those in immediate authority..

as an observation it may be very subtle, or not so subtle.

If one chooses to go back to school.. i.e. grad school. After a certain age, one finds oneself fending for oneself.

How does this fit into the current discussion? No, its not bullying, at least officially.

[cman]

one finds oneself fending for oneself

as it should be

till you are ganged up on

then your individual status is the minority

right or wrong, does not matter then

unless you either shut up, or take it to a next level

if there is another level-either in you or someone else