I know exactly how you feel...but they are not taught to feel anymore. so sad. I will pray for you. THERE ARE ALOT OF ISSUES HANDLED HERE. fOR ME, IT SURFACED TRUTHS i HAD BEEN QUESTIONING FOR QUIT SOME TIME. i DIDNT LURK UNTIL THEY THRU ME OUT.
I am younger in my mind for sure, but I am very married with children. My husband and I are in "discussions" right now and my inlaws acutually are still involved heavily. Thanks Allen, I will keep that in mind.... still need help though I guess we have a lot of things to do before we go....help! Lots of friends and ties and stuff...... Some friends (I believe, will still be there), some esp at HQ, not sure how they will act...well I can assume...
You're in a difficult situation. Do you still believe the teachings of The Way but want to leave because of the corruption? Are you and your husband likeminded on this? Fill us in a little bit more and let's see what we can come up with! :D-->
I don't want to contradict Allen, but I would suggest NOT leaving hints around if you live in an area with leadershi+ barbarians, unless you feel that drama will help. Keep your thoughts quiet and put on your Fellowship face until you are ready to go.
I would suggest a phone call, kept brief, and let them know you will not discuss your choice with them, please leave you alone.
Be aware that you might be trashed as spiritual dreck in your area(we certainly were.) If you have good friends, you might tell them at the same time, before leadershi+ gets the word out with their spin on it.
Bliss I've been out for about a year now. I tried for five years to get my husband to decide to leave with me. He chose TWI over me and so I've also been divorced for about a year.
I've been in your shoes....well, kinda. It's good that you and your husband are at least discussing things. :)-->
Which things bother you the most and which things make you want to leave TWI? Which things do you think mean the most to your family and friends? For me it was the corruption but my ex justified all the things that I was able to tell him by saying that the ministry would be perfect if it weren't for people, but that people are fallible and will certainly make mistakes. The doctrines are the things that would have gotten him to see, but he cosidered me absolutely ignorant and didn't respect or even consider any doctrinal errors i tried to show him.
I highly recommend the books "The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse" and Steve Hassan's "Releasing the Bonds: Helping People to Think for Themselves". I have to be somewhere in about an hour, but if you want to chat, pt or e-mail me, I'll help in any way I can or just lend an ear. My e-mail is scarlettbelle at gmail dot com. :)-->
Who will control your leaving? Will it be you or will it be them? That is why it is important to choose wisely grasshopper :D-->
Heard of the WGB? They are staffers of rank that lurk here and read. More than likely all posts are printed and they will research them for any clue as to who you are. Don't worry; you are safe as long as you leave no hints as to who and where you are.
Once you start telling people you are leaving, the clock will be running. Never know which will call leaders and spill the beans. If leadership is told first, they may be on the phone calling all that know you and warning.
Some where around this place is a How to leave article, maybe read that. But; stay in control and once you've decided when to leave have a plan in place to move swiftly.
Be careful, if you value keeping your family together. Obviously, I don't know you or your husband, but don't under-estimate a spouses loyalty to twi. If you are discussing this together already, then that may be a good sign. Then again it may not end up in a good situation.
Who knows with today's "kinder, gentler" twits maybe they will let you go without a fight. I doubt it though.
If you and your husband can come to a decision on your own before going to leadership, do it and then leave telling them nothing other than they won't be seeing you at fellowship anymore. Leave them with as little information as possible and don't discuss your decision with them. It really is none of their business.
You know, its really sad that you have to behave almost like you're behind the iron curtain, or like you're in some fundamentalist Islamic country trying to leave without getting shot!
For the WayGB that are reading this thread trying to figure out who the 'possessed traitor' is, think about how pathetic your situation is when you have to treat 'the Household of the Body of Christ' in such a fear driven and cowardly manner to where they have to 'sneak out in the dead of night' in order to avoid the Gestapo to get to freedom, hmmm?
Then again if you are corps, and your husband agrees to leave with you, inform as many of your local wayfers of the truth concerning twi and take as many with you as you can. All before you tell your overseer.
Also, mentally prepare yourself for all the fear cards that will be played by leadershi+ and family and friend innies. I know you know the drill--but it is still harsh and shocking when it comes from the mouth of some one you love and respect.
You will not be spiritually punished for leaving TWI.
Actually TWI are the ones that need to fear! When ever anyone leaves they have to exercise damage control to try to keep the flood gates from opening and they have to deal with another exodus.
TWI has no control and are no threat. But being they also are down right evil they will separate friends and family. Not because they care, but because they must protect that most sacred ABS coming in!
I have been out along time so it is hard for me to remember the intracacies of things that you are going through, but i can be pretty sure of telling you that you are doing them no favors if you dont eventually burst the bubble of illusion for your relatives who are still in...I dont know how the timing will work for you but no matter what the surface appearance
Whoa, where do I begin to answer all the questions....
I guess, I will start with the basics.
I was bored, I love the "meat". Haven't got that at all lately. Just some reviews of collaterals. Snorrrrrrr.... so being the wise snoop that I am, I started to read Bulinger, Dake, Kenyon.....never would of done that a few years ago...
Saw some amazing stuff, felt trapped, like I could no share any of it, started to think, (for once)and question everything. Started to see that I could not ask questions or have real bible discussions, truthfully. Ah, my leadership is cool, but I've been a coordinator for a long time and used to be hard on some...I know the deal just say.
Enter: GScafe the "evil of the internet". Never went there, never cared, until all this started working in my heart.
Question: Did you guys know that Most "innies" think that Loy only had a one time consensual affair?" No joke , they all think that!
So of course, I was Shocked at first. But I've been lurking for a while, so I am pretty informed now. Now I question EVERYHTHING! So, now doctrinally I have issues and practically.
My hubby was then informed, he's been a wayfer since sperm...and when he read some stuff, I think PAP, he was shocked and I think a lot heart broken. He could not believe it. But he supports me and believes in me, and we have a great relationship. His only hang up is fear. Mostly of friends, and doctrine. Way is all he knows, never questioned anything..but he's sees the errors and now wants to change, but can't figure out yet what to do. He is not sure there is anything else out there...for him..
Well, one angle that could help with some of the fear is to start looking at local churches. You may find that there is something else out there and that God blesses people in "oh My!" CHURCHES too!! Some churches probably meet at times that are different than regular fellowship times. I found being a part of a real worship service was oh so healing and showed me what I had been missing for so long. Hang in there!
But he supports me and believes in me, and we have a great relationship. His only hang up is fear. Mostly of friends, and doctrine. Way is all he knows, never questioned anything..but he's sees the errors and now wants to change, but can't figure out yet what to do. He is not sure there is anything else out there...for him..
Bliss -- Hey there, and welcome to Greasespot!
Your husband sounds like a great guy. I'll be praying for the both of you to make the right decision, and at the right time.
There is a big, bright, beautiful world out here. I understand the apprehension he is going through, and the fact that you two are talking about it speaks volumes.
The advice given here has been stellar, so please pay attention to what everyone has said. Everyone's exit from twi differs. For some (like me) it was easy. For some (like you and others with family still *in*), it can be difficult, and heart-wrenching.
But the bottom line is --- Ya gotta do, what ya gotta do.
Here are two other websites that tell more about the atrocities of twi, in case you did not know of them.
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moony3424
Are you young and still live with your family or are you an adult on your own? It would be easier if you are the later.
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likeaneagle
are you still in and leaving? or do you have family still in?
Welcome..welcome
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Allan
My suggestion would be to just keep things as 'normal' as possible at the moment,don't arouse any 'suspicion'.And start leaving little hints around ?!
For example, greasespots web address on a piece of paper somewhere where they may pick it up.
You can actually have a bit of fun with it , even though it is obviously not a funny situation.
I'm happy to just email the website name with nothing else attached, they probably wouldn't know me from a tin of Kiwi shoe polish !!
Bless ya !!, Allan.
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likeaneagle
Bliss-
I know exactly how you feel...but they are not taught to feel anymore. so sad. I will pray for you. THERE ARE ALOT OF ISSUES HANDLED HERE. fOR ME, IT SURFACED TRUTHS i HAD BEEN QUESTIONING FOR QUIT SOME TIME. i DIDNT LURK UNTIL THEY THRU ME OUT.
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bliss
I am younger in my mind for sure, but I am very married with children. My husband and I are in "discussions" right now and my inlaws acutually are still involved heavily. Thanks Allen, I will keep that in mind.... still need help though I guess we have a lot of things to do before we go....help! Lots of friends and ties and stuff...... Some friends (I believe, will still be there), some esp at HQ, not sure how they will act...well I can assume...
Thanks for the welcome!
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likeaneagle
well, there is nothing that is going to determine thier response. You have to take a stand for what is right for your family..we are here!
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Sudo
Bliss,
You're in a difficult situation. Do you still believe the teachings of The Way but want to leave because of the corruption? Are you and your husband likeminded on this? Fill us in a little bit more and let's see what we can come up with!
:D-->
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Jim
Bliss,
No better advice that what's been given. Just know there's always suggestions and ears to listen here. Good luck.
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Bramble
I don't want to contradict Allen, but I would suggest NOT leaving hints around if you live in an area with leadershi+ barbarians, unless you feel that drama will help. Keep your thoughts quiet and put on your Fellowship face until you are ready to go.
I would suggest a phone call, kept brief, and let them know you will not discuss your choice with them, please leave you alone.
Be aware that you might be trashed as spiritual dreck in your area(we certainly were.) If you have good friends, you might tell them at the same time, before leadershi+ gets the word out with their spin on it.
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Belle
Bliss I've been out for about a year now. I tried for five years to get my husband to decide to leave with me. He chose TWI over me and so I've also been divorced for about a year.
I've been in your shoes....well, kinda. It's good that you and your husband are at least discussing things.
:)-->
Which things bother you the most and which things make you want to leave TWI? Which things do you think mean the most to your family and friends? For me it was the corruption but my ex justified all the things that I was able to tell him by saying that the ministry would be perfect if it weren't for people, but that people are fallible and will certainly make mistakes. The doctrines are the things that would have gotten him to see, but he cosidered me absolutely ignorant and didn't respect or even consider any doctrinal errors i tried to show him.
I highly recommend the books "The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse" and Steve Hassan's "Releasing the Bonds: Helping People to Think for Themselves". I have to be somewhere in about an hour, but if you want to chat, pt or e-mail me, I'll help in any way I can or just lend an ear. My e-mail is scarlettbelle at gmail dot com.
:)-->
and WLECOME!!!
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wingnut
Control, control, CONTROL!
Who will control your leaving? Will it be you or will it be them? That is why it is important to choose wisely grasshopper
:D-->
Heard of the WGB? They are staffers of rank that lurk here and read. More than likely all posts are printed and they will research them for any clue as to who you are. Don't worry; you are safe as long as you leave no hints as to who and where you are.
Once you start telling people you are leaving, the clock will be running. Never know which will call leaders and spill the beans. If leadership is told first, they may be on the phone calling all that know you and warning.
Some where around this place is a How to leave article, maybe read that. But; stay in control and once you've decided when to leave have a plan in place to move swiftly.
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lindyhopper
Be careful, if you value keeping your family together. Obviously, I don't know you or your husband, but don't under-estimate a spouses loyalty to twi. If you are discussing this together already, then that may be a good sign. Then again it may not end up in a good situation.
Who knows with today's "kinder, gentler" twits maybe they will let you go without a fight. I doubt it though.
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lindyhopper
If you and your husband can come to a decision on your own before going to leadership, do it and then leave telling them nothing other than they won't be seeing you at fellowship anymore. Leave them with as little information as possible and don't discuss your decision with them. It really is none of their business.
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GarthP2000
You know, its really sad that you have to behave almost like you're behind the iron curtain, or like you're in some fundamentalist Islamic country trying to leave without getting shot!
For the WayGB that are reading this thread trying to figure out who the 'possessed traitor' is, think about how pathetic your situation is when you have to treat 'the Household of the Body of Christ' in such a fear driven and cowardly manner to where they have to 'sneak out in the dead of night' in order to avoid the Gestapo to get to freedom, hmmm?
Power for Abundant Living, it is not!
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lindyhopper
Then again if you are corps, and your husband agrees to leave with you, inform as many of your local wayfers of the truth concerning twi and take as many with you as you can. All before you tell your overseer.
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Bramble
Also, mentally prepare yourself for all the fear cards that will be played by leadershi+ and family and friend innies. I know you know the drill--but it is still harsh and shocking when it comes from the mouth of some one you love and respect.
You will not be spiritually punished for leaving TWI.
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wingnut
Actually TWI are the ones that need to fear! When ever anyone leaves they have to exercise damage control to try to keep the flood gates from opening and they have to deal with another exodus.
TWI has no control and are no threat. But being they also are down right evil they will separate friends and family. Not because they care, but because they must protect that most sacred ABS coming in!
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likeaneagle
Oh come on now..
you know leadership will be spiritualy diplomatic..
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mstar1
I have been out along time so it is hard for me to remember the intracacies of things that you are going through, but i can be pretty sure of telling you that you are doing them no favors if you dont eventually burst the bubble of illusion for your relatives who are still in...I dont know how the timing will work for you but no matter what the surface appearance
"a Happy Little World' it isn't....
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bliss
Whoa, where do I begin to answer all the questions....
I guess, I will start with the basics.
I was bored, I love the "meat". Haven't got that at all lately. Just some reviews of collaterals. Snorrrrrrr.... so being the wise snoop that I am, I started to read Bulinger, Dake, Kenyon.....never would of done that a few years ago...
Saw some amazing stuff, felt trapped, like I could no share any of it, started to think, (for once)and question everything. Started to see that I could not ask questions or have real bible discussions, truthfully. Ah, my leadership is cool, but I've been a coordinator for a long time and used to be hard on some...I know the deal just say.
Enter: GScafe the "evil of the internet". Never went there, never cared, until all this started working in my heart.
Question: Did you guys know that Most "innies" think that Loy only had a one time consensual affair?" No joke , they all think that!
So of course, I was Shocked at first. But I've been lurking for a while, so I am pretty informed now. Now I question EVERYHTHING! So, now doctrinally I have issues and practically.
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bliss
My hubby was then informed, he's been a wayfer since sperm...and when he read some stuff, I think PAP, he was shocked and I think a lot heart broken. He could not believe it. But he supports me and believes in me, and we have a great relationship. His only hang up is fear. Mostly of friends, and doctrine. Way is all he knows, never questioned anything..but he's sees the errors and now wants to change, but can't figure out yet what to do. He is not sure there is anything else out there...for him..
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smurfette
Hi and welcome!
Well, one angle that could help with some of the fear is to start looking at local churches. You may find that there is something else out there and that God blesses people in "oh My!" CHURCHES too!! Some churches probably meet at times that are different than regular fellowship times. I found being a part of a real worship service was oh so healing and showed me what I had been missing for so long. Hang in there!
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dmiller
Bliss -- Hey there, and welcome to Greasespot!
Your husband sounds like a great guy. I'll be praying for the both of you to make the right decision, and at the right time.
There is a big, bright, beautiful world out here. I understand the apprehension he is going through, and the fact that you two are talking about it speaks volumes.
The advice given here has been stellar, so please pay attention to what everyone has said. Everyone's exit from twi differs. For some (like me) it was easy. For some (like you and others with family still *in*), it can be difficult, and heart-wrenching.
But the bottom line is --- Ya gotta do, what ya gotta do.
Here are two other websites that tell more about the atrocities of twi, in case you did not know of them.
EX-CULT WORLD and,
WAY CHRIST.
God bless, and good luck. We are all in your corner!!
:)-->
David
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dmiller
Allan --- ROFL!!!
:D--> 
:D--> 
:D-->
You look a whole lot better than a tin of Kiwi shoe polish!!
Does one have to be spiritually *mature* to know the difference?
-->
David
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