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Howard the Duck Allen's "Squirrel thinning" activities


Ham
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OK Bolshevik. Spill the beans..

:biglaugh:

the only picture I get of this scene is a well past middle aged half drunken.. whatever.. blasting away in the woods with something like an eight or ten gauge shotgun (just the enough spread of shot to insure "victory") to rid the holy land of Squirrel infestation.

Tell me it isn't true..

:biglaugh:

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I mean.. isn't the whole "exercise" rather self defeating? Yep.. rid the woods of Squirrel *menace* to merely make room for more Squirrels?

:biglaugh:

And remember, mr. duck. When you look over your shoulder, or in the rear view mirror, I am the one you missed..

:biglaugh:

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Having myself been on several squirrel hunting expeditions into the WayWoods, the reason I always heard given was to "thin out the Jimmies".

I guess there's a small squirrel in Ohio known as a "Jimmy". Supposedly this dastardly little cretin has a habit of biting the testicles off of the larger Gray and Fox squirrels. Or so said the emminent outdoorsman, Mr. Allen. (I would suppose that only the males of the species were the victims of such attacks)

At any rate, every so often some of the WayBuilders would grab their shotguns and - with the previously garnered blessing of Mr. Allen - head off to the woods to selectively harvest some nuisance critters.

I also went out to several other woods in the area to hunt Grays and Foxes and actually bar-be-qued a sizeable portion of said creatures on occasion. What else ya gonna do all winter?

Edited by George Aar
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Supposedly this dastardly little cretin has a habit of biting the testicles off of the larger Gray and Fox squirrels

gawd forbid we have any "homo" pre-disposition in squirrels..

:biglaugh:

yep.. makes sense.. if one can't tolerate a "homo" pet.. willing to "blow away" rover for.. (self censored description of vile acts) surely we can't condone the same in squirrels..

:biglaugh:

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I guess there's a small squirrel in Ohio known as a "Jimmy". Supposedly this dastardly little cretin has a habit of biting the testicles off of the larger Gray and Fox squirrels.

Another Way myth is laid to rest.

HERE

And an added twist of irony:

If you want to hunt squirrels as a food source, why choose the tiny red squirrel?

Wouldn't it make more sense to take the Greys or, even larger, Fox Squirrels?

Edited by waysider
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you had to sign up for them, then later on you'd get a map outlining your tiny section of woods. You'd also get a list of instructions like don't shoot below 10' and don't shoot rosie :biglaugh:

never even saw a dang squirrel, course the next day they'd be everywhere

one dude did use a shotgun, and got two in one outing

H. @llen would keep a tally and announce the "winner" at lunch time. He'd also instruct the women not to pray for the squirrels.

. . .

Ham, you do hear about what going on across the pond between the English Reds and the American Grays?

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Yep.. they are planning grey squirrel genocide..

:biglaugh:

some say Benjamin Franklin introduced the grey squirrel to Britain.. others say they were imported in the Victorian era to "amuse" the aristocracy.. then the yankee squirrels did what yankee squirrels do.. reproduce like a plague..

:biglaugh:

warning: the article is silly, but factually correct. Best I can tell anyway..

http://www.scarysquirrel.org/vacation/ukcull/index.html

I also understand that the greys carry a form of "squirrel pox" that the red squirrels cannot develop immunity to..

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It was on PBS yesterday, kinda like the European invasion of the Americas, bringing disease, and attacking the locals. Some British folk see some metaphor or something with the grays being boisterous and gluttonous like Americans, and the reds being sophisticated and dainty or something. :biglaugh:

The reds are okay to me, but our grays are just fine I think. :biglaugh:

And what's with calling HA a duck?

Edited by Bolshevik
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And what's with calling HA a duck?

Just a nickname he picked up here. I have no idea what the significance is, or even where it started..

Maybe its because someone figured he had the brain of the size of a duck's?

:biglaugh:

who knows..

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Just a nickname he picked up here. I have no idea what the significance is, or even where it started..

Maybe its because someone figured he had the brain of the size of a duck's?

:biglaugh:

who knows..

We used to call my niece "duck butt" because her diaper and the way she walked looked kinda like a duck. Maybe in Howie's case someone dropped the butt part.

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In my neck of the woods, this is a common sight:

WhiteSquirrel.JPG

And about a hundred miles north, these are the common variety:

mentalsquirrelMMP_468x371.jpg

They're really just variations of the Grey Squirrel.

We've got those white ones around too.

Seen those black ones out west a bit.

Used to see red ones back east.

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from your reference Waysider, the movie scored:

Worst Picture, New Star, Visual Effects, and Screenplay.

maybe that's the connection to HA.. the critics can't find anything positive to say..

:biglaugh:

We used to call my niece "duck butt" because her diaper and the way she walked looked kinda like a duck. Maybe in Howie's case someone dropped the butt part.

In regards to *mr* allen, if I dropped anything, it would be the "duck" part.

:biglaugh:

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  • 9 months later...

I went out once and blasted one out of it's nest. Hopefully, not relation to you Ham! :realmad:

I never could figure what ole' HA had up his a$$ when it came to squirrels...maybe it was a squirrel?...one can never really know about these things.

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