what brave and honest words. I have forty year span betwen siblings in my family. I see the change in how people speak and think about sex and children and disclosure clearly.
you have a keen and honest perspective Galen . even forty years ago . It is didfficult to explain to those who do not know, somhow people want to live in it is them not anyone I truly love world.
it is safer cleaner nicer and much less threat to your well being.
I talked to my son the other day and he is concerned that his little sister is so very beautiful , really kind of angry that she turns heads and is out going. I laughed and said why are you so worried he said"well it didnt matter to me untill some of my own friends started noticing ". victims of childhood sexual abuse often turn to sex as a result seeking the type of love they learned in childhood. ironic but very true.
many of the street hookers will testify to how they ended up on the corner or dancing in the strip joint because of being sexual abused at a young age and never telling anyone and the fact no one would believe them. If you truly love your husband and have a good marriage and your home is happy if you were a child would you tell? and be guilty of breaking up the family? a very large burden for a small dependent soul to bear and few honestly do .
and sometimes mom is dependent as well who is to say they will believe you?
Galen your very right with small children it is very wise for those intrusted with their care to be very very alert and aware.
Honestly Galen.... a loud resounding NO! Judging from the disgusted reaction of my spouse...I would say that we both find your presumption to be sickening.
Contrary to your statement, most folks are NOT tempted sexually by children......and to make it appear as if it is normal, I find disturbing.
Do you have any documentaion to back this up, or is it meerly an assumption on your part?
I think it sends a mixed message to a community when a) someone is considered so vile that they are shamed in front of the whole town...yet, b) they are free to go out in public like everybody else. This leads to a dangerous witch hunt mentality, IMO. Witch hunting is a form of lust that, like all forms of lust is never satisfied. What's REALLY worse? One child molester, or 9,999 witch hunters in a town of 10,000? Nobody on my street even talks about that stuff.
Krys: Yeah, I'd want to sell my house, too, but who'd want to buy it?
I think the police do protect them it is their duty, if they get threatened or attacked.
so johniam
your saying you would rather live in a community that does not inform itself of the child molesters in the comunity? No pictures on the door in your town hmm? maybe that way you can think their is no child molesters as well I know the illusion .
it is a constant reminder everyday for us. to be honest this doesnt cross my mind till I see the stupid pictures and or one of them in the street. I wouldnt recognize them from normal people if not for the pictures.
ignorance is bliss type thinking?
I have not really looked but does any other town do this?
I love my town but sometimes I think we all are a little to defined in our ways.. at times when I see them all lined up on the door I think ya know do we have this much pride to HAVE to do this ? but then IM glad and really glad that we do . smile.
like Galen says it the most excellant way! " I think anyone who is honest with themselves knows the answer".
honesty is a freaking burden and your RIGHT does not sell much property !!!! haha no problem here tho we have prime and I mean to tell ya prime real estate! It is the most beautiful town and we truly do love one another . honestly warts and all.
Galen wow Im impressed, truly impressed.
your so right on.
those with the biggest mouth on GS do not speak nearly as LOUD as those words. how beautiful to have that voice and I bet you also have the ears to hear the call of any victim.
unlike those who can not bear to hear the truth which hurts sometimes esp. in the case of sexual abuse.
Galen
love mj412
It is no wonder to me the state has given you and your wife some of the most abused children to care for. you are indeed a protector of children and show the deepest love for all innocent ones.
I do not have the time to explain anything to you. suffice to say he is honest and real and willing to consider the realness of what mankind is or can be regardless of the circumstances.
A person must have ears to hear the cry of a wimper in the night EX. Ears to hear , even if it is unspeakable .
yeah ya know some of these guys are very educated and talented and can do some genuine service there . in the very least it may stop the CYCLE of abuse that is out of control in America.
Im willing to pay for it. these guys often cost the prison system alot of money because they are hated in that system as well and have to be guarded and kept special .
My first foster child was a 14-year-old girl whose father had been sexually abusing her since the age of 12. He was actually her stepfather, but had raised her from a toddler, and had four grown biological daughters, at least three of whom he had also sexually abused. This man was one sick SOB, and felt it perfectly logical that he should be the one to sexually initiate his girls!
The foster child was one screwed up young lady. Her mom, unfortunately, was a classic enabler, who told me that the child as a 12-year-old flaunted herself in front of Daddy Strangelove, wriggling her bottom when she went upstairs in front of him and wearing provocative clothing.
Of course, mom was buying her clothing, which varied wildly between dresses that were dark, long, baggy, high necked and long sleeved, to lingerie from Frederick's of Hollywood.
People, this is sick, sick, perverted thinking on both parents' parts. If Daddy Strangelove is looking at this 12 year old kid and thinking "Man, she's a hottie!" he is one perverted bastard who needs a quick Galatians 5:12 to get his attention off a child.
Mom is no better. She sees her daughter as a competitor, not a child. She had the girl taking care of the younger kids (3, 2 girls) like a mom, fixing the meals and cleaning the house and helping with homework.
Now the point is, it is unnatural and out of control mentally and physically for a grown man to allow his mind to even for one millimicron of a nanosecond to go in that direction. I am fully aware that in the 18th and 19th centuries in this country, 60-year-old men were married to, as maybe their second or third wife, young girls in their early teens. (Usually the first one or ones had died from too much childbearing and hard work). I'm also aware that that was an acceptable social custom.
Yeah, and in India it was once the social custom for wives to voluntarily climb onto a funeral pyre, sit meekly down beside their husband's dead body and be burned alive with him. So does that make it okay today? Of course not!!! Neither of these social customs is right, not for this day and time, and IMO not EVER.
You can call it abuse, or adultery, or an oopsie when a 60-year-old man molests his 12-year-old daughter. It is still wrong in the eyes of God and should be in the eyes of man.
That young girl - got pregnant at 17 and when I refused to give her money for an abortion (I didn't believe in it then or now) ran off to live with her boyfriend, who called her a whore and threw her out (she was attracted to men who treated her like $hit - guess why?) and ended up right back in Daddy Strangelove's house with Daddy Strangelove and Mommy Weirdo running her life.
Don't ever tell me it was okay for that creep to be attracted to her! I don't care if she stripped herself naked, threw herself on the floor in front of him,and said please!
I think some of us are ascribing ideas to Galen that don't belong there. Galen said very little about child molesting, most of his remarks concerned adult men (at least sexually adult around 18 at least). What he said about these men is true.
Men are turned on by sight. They don't even have to be thinking of "love" ect...but if there is something they see, some young thing, that is appealing they are likely to get turned on. And by "some young thing' I don't mean a child.
When men get aroused, it's not something they can control. It is an automatic physiological response to what their eyes see. Some men are much more prone to this than others, especially when young (around 18 just to stay within the "adult" framework). When men are aroused, they hve a clear visible sign that states the obvious. Furthermore, there is nothing they can do to turn this response off....it will go away when the sights change, it a short while.
In the whole realm of mammals, all males will go for the youngest healthiest female because that way they have the greatest opportunity for their offspring to survive and be born. That is pure biology. I know we are much more than biological creatures, but we cannot escape the features that are built into our bodies, so it is normal and natural for men to be attracted to younger women. As men mature, not necessarily age-wise, they are less inclined to follow their physiology and behave in a more "civiliaed" fashion.
Now - here's the rub (yes, I know - it is a bad pun!!!). Young women do not understand this erection response. They are just as interested in having sex as men are, so when they see this response, they believe it is directed at them, and respond accordingly. Eventually it is likely that the inevitable may occur.
Galen does not need to explain himself to us, but I see that some of us seem to be judging the ROTC thing wrongly. I'm not trying to speak for him, or in place of him, but Galen is a strong personality with very high morality. He's been in situations over the course of his military career that most of us can only imagine and we'd be only partly right. He's a man of measured words (not like me....tee hee)
ROTC is only simetimes a classroom coure and only once per week do the cadets wear their uniforms. The rest of the time they wear street clothes. We all know how some young women like to dress. Imagine such young women practicing drills, shoulders back, chest out etc.
When Galen says he knows himself he's talking about more than his moral and ethical behavior. He knows his body too. Now just suppose that just once, his biology kicks in while working with a highwchool girl. She doesn't know anything except what she sees....so she reports it, as she should! What happens to Galen then? It's not a pretty picture.
I have total respect and great affection for him on these boards. When I see a post by Galen, I pay close attention because he always adds something important.
Galen, forgive me if I've embarrassed you, that was not my intention. It just seemed to me that some people either forgot about the sight-response thing or ignored it...and I know very few people really know what ROTC treaining in a high school really involves. I just don't want anyone to have an excuse to think ill of you.
This is a very powerful thread. It touches on something that is both sensitive and important.
Galen says..."To pick out one form of adultry and hold it as seperate and a disease to mankind is also wrong"
That sounds like waybrain to me. "Every sin is the same to God"...isn't that what wierwille taught?
No Galen, not all men are attracted to teenage girls. Are the girls pretty? You bet they are...but there is a HUGE difference between finding a girl attractive and being attracted to her. Every now and then I enjoy eating a good apple, but I am never tempted to pick an unripe one off the tree...and of course there is a difference between a 16 year old and an 8 year old...I think we all know the difference between a child and someone who can pass a fake ID...My concern is for children. To protect them from the monsters that stalk this earth...and if that means putting up posters in public, then lets make the posters big.
When you consider the damage that is done to a child when they are sexually molested...the betrayal of trust...the corruption of the innocence...the long lasting hurt and the dysfunction...Yes, I DO hold this crime as seperate! A child molester should consider himself lucky that he even got out of jail to begin with...paid for his crime? not hardly.
Didn't Jesus single out this crime also, as especially bad?...something like..."Woe unto them who hurt children" ( literal according to Uncle Hairy). For someone who is normally quite progressive when it comes to social issues, I find myself turning into a "redneck" when it comes to this issue...If they are gonna be turned loose from jail, maybe we should "nut em" first?
Am I ‘capable’ of being a child-molester? I think it more prudent not to answer that question.
Are YOU ‘capable’ of being a child-molester? Is your husband?
I think that anyone who is honest with themselves knows the answer.
Dunno Krys, it appears to me, as if couched in all of that *wisdome* ... Galen is saying that we are ALL capable of child molestation if we are simply honest with ourselves.
Any *normal* person would answere his own query with...a not only no, but *HE LL NO!* but he says that *it more prudent NOT to answere? shiver
I vehemently disagree with him on this, and demand to know his sources for such a statement.....otherwise it is merely his own disgusting opinion.
Rather than respect, I am struck with revulsion....sorry
I disagree with how you are reading what Galen posted.
He may have phrased it poorly.
What he is saying is that you know in yourself whether or not you are capable of being a child molester. That is, if you take an honest look at yourself, can you say that you would not be a child molester? In my case the answer is: I could not be a child molester. Not everyone can answer honestly that way.
He's NOT saying that everyone is capable of being child molesters.
He IS saying "take an honest look at yourself".
As to *why* he is making those points, that I can't answer.
I am not reading that anyone is saying it is "ok" just that it does happen and in my opinion a any man or woman who can be aware boundaries esp. out loud is much much safer than one who lives in a place that it can and never ever would be possible by somone they care deeply about.
Denial is difficult and in so many cases of sexual abuse it is a learned behaviour , male and female, it is instill by both sexes from a very young age as love. Incest is found in very loving functional families. that is why it is often in family court and conseling is ordered as the remedy.
love is a good thing. child molesters live and function very very well in society it isnt like drugs or alcohol where eventualy you have a more difficulty hiding the behaviour... in fact as time goes by it gets easier for a perp to manipulate and abuse as the trust goes deeper and denial is formed within another generation.
to stop the cycle means addressing your family and those who didnt help you those who couldnt protect you, those who are guilty of not stopping the pain. It means being angry at the other victims doesnt it?
and LOVE even dysfunctional is what every single human being on earth wants in life, to belong to know your ok and they are ok , to deny your own family or friend is very difficult . hence why so many do not can not would NEVER admit it could even be possible. because love is suppose to protect one another.
trust me statistics clearly prove it is VERY POSSIBLE. It is those who blind themselves to the facts of this dysfunction that can never ever truly hear a victims call, it hurts to much. so the victims say silent and carry on with the only love they have known and repeat the same dynamics in their own families.
the facts are.
child molesters are trusted loved and cherished by children and their families. child molesters seldom if ever admit to being wrong in their behaviour. Children learn what they live. how to be loved and love is instilled by adults.
it isnt out there people do like to speak about the fact at all.
the hard core reaction and anger the very possibility of thinking about someone you love and care about doing such a thing can and does shut down many already terrified small voices.
you may never hear them. so they go to the love that knows the truth that live in the mess that understands the pain .
Steve, I would welcome clarification from Galen....I find it repulsive for him to intimate that ANY normal adult would tolerate, much less consider child molestation if only we were simply *honest*
I followed a story about a guy doing time for rape.
he wanted his balls cut off before they released him on parole.
he isnt the only one either sometimes these guys beg for a way out of the misery they live and they know they will do it again .
he went to court and the civil liberty freaks got a hold of it and considered it inhumane. he lost they would not cut his nuts off and he was released back into the public swearing he will most probably rape again.
now we are ok with clipping dogs and cats so they cant do it why not these guys? I know some want it and feel it is the only true solution why not?
we allow those who want to change sex to cut off their thingy but not these guys the liberals think it is unjust!!! food for thought.
I think any man who wants to have his balls cut off should be allowed and Im willing to pay for it if he is guilty of rape or molestation.
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CoolWaters
Speak for yourself, bub.
It is abnormal to be 'tempted' by little children.
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mj412
Galen
what brave and honest words. I have forty year span betwen siblings in my family. I see the change in how people speak and think about sex and children and disclosure clearly.
you have a keen and honest perspective Galen . even forty years ago . It is didfficult to explain to those who do not know, somhow people want to live in it is them not anyone I truly love world.
it is safer cleaner nicer and much less threat to your well being.
I talked to my son the other day and he is concerned that his little sister is so very beautiful , really kind of angry that she turns heads and is out going. I laughed and said why are you so worried he said"well it didnt matter to me untill some of my own friends started noticing ". victims of childhood sexual abuse often turn to sex as a result seeking the type of love they learned in childhood. ironic but very true.
many of the street hookers will testify to how they ended up on the corner or dancing in the strip joint because of being sexual abused at a young age and never telling anyone and the fact no one would believe them. If you truly love your husband and have a good marriage and your home is happy if you were a child would you tell? and be guilty of breaking up the family? a very large burden for a small dependent soul to bear and few honestly do .
and sometimes mom is dependent as well who is to say they will believe you?
Galen your very right with small children it is very wise for those intrusted with their care to be very very alert and aware.
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rascal
Honestly Galen.... a loud resounding NO! Judging from the disgusted reaction of my spouse...I would say that we both find your presumption to be sickening.
Contrary to your statement, most folks are NOT tempted sexually by children......and to make it appear as if it is normal, I find disturbing.
Do you have any documentaion to back this up, or is it meerly an assumption on your part?
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johniam
I think it sends a mixed message to a community when a) someone is considered so vile that they are shamed in front of the whole town...yet, b) they are free to go out in public like everybody else. This leads to a dangerous witch hunt mentality, IMO. Witch hunting is a form of lust that, like all forms of lust is never satisfied. What's REALLY worse? One child molester, or 9,999 witch hunters in a town of 10,000? Nobody on my street even talks about that stuff.
Krys: Yeah, I'd want to sell my house, too, but who'd want to buy it?
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johniam
Another thing. Perhaps there's no easy solution for the dilemma...
a) someone is considered so vile that they are shamed in front of the whole town...yet, b) they are free to go out in public like everybody else.
Maybe they should all be put in colonies like leper colonies used to be. The laws have to be adjusted somewhere!
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mj412
I think the police do protect them it is their duty, if they get threatened or attacked.
so johniam
your saying you would rather live in a community that does not inform itself of the child molesters in the comunity? No pictures on the door in your town hmm? maybe that way you can think their is no child molesters as well I know the illusion .
it is a constant reminder everyday for us. to be honest this doesnt cross my mind till I see the stupid pictures and or one of them in the street. I wouldnt recognize them from normal people if not for the pictures.
ignorance is bliss type thinking?
I have not really looked but does any other town do this?
I love my town but sometimes I think we all are a little to defined in our ways.. at times when I see them all lined up on the door I think ya know do we have this much pride to HAVE to do this ? but then IM glad and really glad that we do . smile.
like Galen says it the most excellant way! " I think anyone who is honest with themselves knows the answer".
honesty is a freaking burden and your RIGHT does not sell much property !!!! haha no problem here tho we have prime and I mean to tell ya prime real estate! It is the most beautiful town and we truly do love one another . honestly warts and all.
Galen wow Im impressed, truly impressed.
your so right on.
those with the biggest mouth on GS do not speak nearly as LOUD as those words. how beautiful to have that voice and I bet you also have the ears to hear the call of any victim.
unlike those who can not bear to hear the truth which hurts sometimes esp. in the case of sexual abuse.
Galen
love mj412
It is no wonder to me the state has given you and your wife some of the most abused children to care for. you are indeed a protector of children and show the deepest love for all innocent ones.
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mj412
johniam
that is what I say put them on an island somwhere . give them jobs and food and housing and only those who want to see them can go there .
yep . I think some would be willing to live away from children and the temptation or even the accusasion again.
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excathedra
please explain to me why galen is so brave in his words and thinking
i do not get it
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krys
Maybe all those centuries ago, isolated penal colonies weren't such a bad idea.
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mj412
ex
I do not have the time to explain anything to you. suffice to say he is honest and real and willing to consider the realness of what mankind is or can be regardless of the circumstances.
A person must have ears to hear the cry of a wimper in the night EX. Ears to hear , even if it is unspeakable .
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mj412
yeah ya know some of these guys are very educated and talented and can do some genuine service there . in the very least it may stop the CYCLE of abuse that is out of control in America.
Im willing to pay for it. these guys often cost the prison system alot of money because they are hated in that system as well and have to be guarded and kept special .
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mj412
Galen can explain his own self.
it isnt my job. sigh your own self Shellon.
nor it is my job to convince another of anything it is only a discussion not some group think allegence of who is who or is it for you?
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mj412
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excathedra
okay, MJ
back to galen
i disagree if we're talking about child molestationLink to comment
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Watered Garden
My first foster child was a 14-year-old girl whose father had been sexually abusing her since the age of 12. He was actually her stepfather, but had raised her from a toddler, and had four grown biological daughters, at least three of whom he had also sexually abused. This man was one sick SOB, and felt it perfectly logical that he should be the one to sexually initiate his girls!
The foster child was one screwed up young lady. Her mom, unfortunately, was a classic enabler, who told me that the child as a 12-year-old flaunted herself in front of Daddy Strangelove, wriggling her bottom when she went upstairs in front of him and wearing provocative clothing.
Of course, mom was buying her clothing, which varied wildly between dresses that were dark, long, baggy, high necked and long sleeved, to lingerie from Frederick's of Hollywood.
People, this is sick, sick, perverted thinking on both parents' parts. If Daddy Strangelove is looking at this 12 year old kid and thinking "Man, she's a hottie!" he is one perverted bastard who needs a quick Galatians 5:12 to get his attention off a child.
Mom is no better. She sees her daughter as a competitor, not a child. She had the girl taking care of the younger kids (3, 2 girls) like a mom, fixing the meals and cleaning the house and helping with homework.
Now the point is, it is unnatural and out of control mentally and physically for a grown man to allow his mind to even for one millimicron of a nanosecond to go in that direction. I am fully aware that in the 18th and 19th centuries in this country, 60-year-old men were married to, as maybe their second or third wife, young girls in their early teens. (Usually the first one or ones had died from too much childbearing and hard work). I'm also aware that that was an acceptable social custom.
Yeah, and in India it was once the social custom for wives to voluntarily climb onto a funeral pyre, sit meekly down beside their husband's dead body and be burned alive with him. So does that make it okay today? Of course not!!! Neither of these social customs is right, not for this day and time, and IMO not EVER.
You can call it abuse, or adultery, or an oopsie when a 60-year-old man molests his 12-year-old daughter. It is still wrong in the eyes of God and should be in the eyes of man.
That young girl - got pregnant at 17 and when I refused to give her money for an abortion (I didn't believe in it then or now) ran off to live with her boyfriend, who called her a whore and threw her out (she was attracted to men who treated her like $hit - guess why?) and ended up right back in Daddy Strangelove's house with Daddy Strangelove and Mommy Weirdo running her life.
Don't ever tell me it was okay for that creep to be attracted to her! I don't care if she stripped herself naked, threw herself on the floor in front of him,and said please!
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krys
Well, let me intergect here!
I think some of us are ascribing ideas to Galen that don't belong there. Galen said very little about child molesting, most of his remarks concerned adult men (at least sexually adult around 18 at least). What he said about these men is true.
Men are turned on by sight. They don't even have to be thinking of "love" ect...but if there is something they see, some young thing, that is appealing they are likely to get turned on. And by "some young thing' I don't mean a child.
When men get aroused, it's not something they can control. It is an automatic physiological response to what their eyes see. Some men are much more prone to this than others, especially when young (around 18 just to stay within the "adult" framework). When men are aroused, they hve a clear visible sign that states the obvious. Furthermore, there is nothing they can do to turn this response off....it will go away when the sights change, it a short while.
In the whole realm of mammals, all males will go for the youngest healthiest female because that way they have the greatest opportunity for their offspring to survive and be born. That is pure biology. I know we are much more than biological creatures, but we cannot escape the features that are built into our bodies, so it is normal and natural for men to be attracted to younger women. As men mature, not necessarily age-wise, they are less inclined to follow their physiology and behave in a more "civiliaed" fashion.
Now - here's the rub (yes, I know - it is a bad pun!!!). Young women do not understand this erection response. They are just as interested in having sex as men are, so when they see this response, they believe it is directed at them, and respond accordingly. Eventually it is likely that the inevitable may occur.
Galen does not need to explain himself to us, but I see that some of us seem to be judging the ROTC thing wrongly. I'm not trying to speak for him, or in place of him, but Galen is a strong personality with very high morality. He's been in situations over the course of his military career that most of us can only imagine and we'd be only partly right. He's a man of measured words (not like me....tee hee)
ROTC is only simetimes a classroom coure and only once per week do the cadets wear their uniforms. The rest of the time they wear street clothes. We all know how some young women like to dress. Imagine such young women practicing drills, shoulders back, chest out etc.
When Galen says he knows himself he's talking about more than his moral and ethical behavior. He knows his body too. Now just suppose that just once, his biology kicks in while working with a highwchool girl. She doesn't know anything except what she sees....so she reports it, as she should! What happens to Galen then? It's not a pretty picture.
I have total respect and great affection for him on these boards. When I see a post by Galen, I pay close attention because he always adds something important.
Galen, forgive me if I've embarrassed you, that was not my intention. It just seemed to me that some people either forgot about the sight-response thing or ignored it...and I know very few people really know what ROTC treaining in a high school really involves. I just don't want anyone to have an excuse to think ill of you.
krys
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GrouchoMarxJr
This is a very powerful thread. It touches on something that is both sensitive and important.
Galen says..."To pick out one form of adultry and hold it as seperate and a disease to mankind is also wrong"
That sounds like waybrain to me. "Every sin is the same to God"...isn't that what wierwille taught?
No Galen, not all men are attracted to teenage girls. Are the girls pretty? You bet they are...but there is a HUGE difference between finding a girl attractive and being attracted to her. Every now and then I enjoy eating a good apple, but I am never tempted to pick an unripe one off the tree...and of course there is a difference between a 16 year old and an 8 year old...I think we all know the difference between a child and someone who can pass a fake ID...My concern is for children. To protect them from the monsters that stalk this earth...and if that means putting up posters in public, then lets make the posters big.
When you consider the damage that is done to a child when they are sexually molested...the betrayal of trust...the corruption of the innocence...the long lasting hurt and the dysfunction...Yes, I DO hold this crime as seperate! A child molester should consider himself lucky that he even got out of jail to begin with...paid for his crime? not hardly.
Didn't Jesus single out this crime also, as especially bad?...something like..."Woe unto them who hurt children" ( literal according to Uncle Hairy). For someone who is normally quite progressive when it comes to social issues, I find myself turning into a "redneck" when it comes to this issue...If they are gonna be turned loose from jail, maybe we should "nut em" first?
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rascal
Dunno Krys, it appears to me, as if couched in all of that *wisdome* ... Galen is saying that we are ALL capable of child molestation if we are simply honest with ourselves.
Any *normal* person would answere his own query with...a not only no, but *HE LL NO!* but he says that *it more prudent NOT to answere? shiver
I vehemently disagree with him on this, and demand to know his sources for such a statement.....otherwise it is merely his own disgusting opinion.
Rather than respect, I am struck with revulsion....sorry
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Watered Garden
Golly gee whiz, I KNOW about the male arousal thing! But I do think it starts between the ears.
I never thought for one minute that Galen was encouraging or condoning child sexual abuse.
But I don't agree with his post, okay? It's just my opinion, based on what I've seen happen to more than one child.
WG
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Steve!
Rascal -
I disagree with how you are reading what Galen posted.
He may have phrased it poorly.
What he is saying is that you know in yourself whether or not you are capable of being a child molester. That is, if you take an honest look at yourself, can you say that you would not be a child molester? In my case the answer is: I could not be a child molester. Not everyone can answer honestly that way.
He's NOT saying that everyone is capable of being child molesters.
He IS saying "take an honest look at yourself".
As to *why* he is making those points, that I can't answer.
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mj412
I am not reading that anyone is saying it is "ok" just that it does happen and in my opinion a any man or woman who can be aware boundaries esp. out loud is much much safer than one who lives in a place that it can and never ever would be possible by somone they care deeply about.
Denial is difficult and in so many cases of sexual abuse it is a learned behaviour , male and female, it is instill by both sexes from a very young age as love. Incest is found in very loving functional families. that is why it is often in family court and conseling is ordered as the remedy.
love is a good thing. child molesters live and function very very well in society it isnt like drugs or alcohol where eventualy you have a more difficulty hiding the behaviour... in fact as time goes by it gets easier for a perp to manipulate and abuse as the trust goes deeper and denial is formed within another generation.
to stop the cycle means addressing your family and those who didnt help you those who couldnt protect you, those who are guilty of not stopping the pain. It means being angry at the other victims doesnt it?
and LOVE even dysfunctional is what every single human being on earth wants in life, to belong to know your ok and they are ok , to deny your own family or friend is very difficult . hence why so many do not can not would NEVER admit it could even be possible. because love is suppose to protect one another.
trust me statistics clearly prove it is VERY POSSIBLE. It is those who blind themselves to the facts of this dysfunction that can never ever truly hear a victims call, it hurts to much. so the victims say silent and carry on with the only love they have known and repeat the same dynamics in their own families.
the facts are.
child molesters are trusted loved and cherished by children and their families. child molesters seldom if ever admit to being wrong in their behaviour. Children learn what they live. how to be loved and love is instilled by adults.
it isnt out there people do like to speak about the fact at all.
the hard core reaction and anger the very possibility of thinking about someone you love and care about doing such a thing can and does shut down many already terrified small voices.
you may never hear them. so they go to the love that knows the truth that live in the mess that understands the pain .
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Steve!
Krys - we *are* more than just biological units following instinctual imperatives.
What separates us from animals is our ability to control how we respond to stimuli.
Granted, many many men *don't* control their own minds and allow whatever urges to dominate them.
But sweeping generalizations are always wrong - including this one.
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rascal
Steve, I would welcome clarification from Galen....I find it repulsive for him to intimate that ANY normal adult would tolerate, much less consider child molestation if only we were simply *honest*
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mj412
ya know about the denutting these guys.
I followed a story about a guy doing time for rape.
he wanted his balls cut off before they released him on parole.
he isnt the only one either sometimes these guys beg for a way out of the misery they live and they know they will do it again .
he went to court and the civil liberty freaks got a hold of it and considered it inhumane. he lost they would not cut his nuts off and he was released back into the public swearing he will most probably rape again.
now we are ok with clipping dogs and cats so they cant do it why not these guys? I know some want it and feel it is the only true solution why not?
we allow those who want to change sex to cut off their thingy but not these guys the liberals think it is unjust!!! food for thought.
I think any man who wants to have his balls cut off should be allowed and Im willing to pay for it if he is guilty of rape or molestation.
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