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Vulgarity, rudeness, adult conversations, etc.


CoolWaters
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When I was 19yo my boyfriend (now husband) moved me from Kansas to California...to be a fisherman's wife! The culture shock was bad enough...but living onboard a boat and having only fishermen and their families for company...well, it was eye-opening to say the least.

But dang if I didn't learn to LOVE cussin' like a sailor! :biglaugh: And telling tawdry jokes...and just fitting in quite nicely.

So nothing much bugs me about words people use in their conversations, jokes they tell, subjects they talk about.

Hubs and I were talking this morning about something that happened in AK in twi...when he told some off-color jokes...and the branch leader (who later became a convicted pedophile) reamed my hubs for nearly an hour about how my hubs was introducing debbil spurts.

We wondered how people felt about such things after being out of twi. So...

What bugs you?

What are your definitions of vulgarity, rudeness, and other things that bug you?

Are you ever so bothered by such things that you put people on ignore...or...GASP...even report the post?

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Not much bugs me about the words people use (though the "f" word every other syllable gets a little old). It's the content of some blatherings that I sometimes find offensive.

Arrogance, condescension, intolerance, bigotry, those are the kind of things that I find obnoxious.

Of course if I exhibit those traits, it's perfectly O.K....

Oh, but to answer your question, no, I never put anybody on "ignore" or whatever. I figure I'm a big boy now and can handle the trauma of reading other's opinions. Even if - HORRORS! - they don't agree with mine.

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Not much bugs me about the words people use (though the "f" word every other syllable gets a little old). It's the content of some blatherings that I sometimes find offensive.

Arrogance, condescension, intolerance, bigotry, those are the kind of things that I find obnoxious.

Of course if I exhibit those traits, it's perfectly O.K....

:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

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Im cussin like a sailor a lot of the time myself so that doesnt bother me-- I find it much more offensive that pedophileboy was wasoffended by cussing but didnt mind having his way with children......Now that is &^%&^sick

Dishonesty, and double standard behaviour is vulgar and rude to me no matter how sweetly spoken someone may be.

Its strange--- most of the heavy cussin people I know I would pretty much trust my life to in a pinch if I had to--for the most part they are very trustable---, the sweet talkers, I am much more wary of

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Dishonesty, I would have to say is at the top of my list. People who like to gossip and people who like to play the victim card especially when they know there is help out there but they refuse to get it, are the other biggies.......

Cowgirl

Edited by Cowgirl
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I can take language that is real, mistakes that are real, and people that are real.

What I dont like are people who pretend to be something they are not, or

people who are bothered by something someone says or does and cant confront them, lovingly or honestly about it. BRICK WALLS are a cowards way out. NEVER will work.

Thank you,

DAWN

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Vulgar language bothers me a bit. especially when it is used in front of my daughter.

It wasn't too long ago when I ran into a local guy that I used to work with -- James. He sat down at that table next to me and my daughter to talk a bit. Every other word out of his mouth was f* in some form or another, along with GD and assorted others expletives.

I politely pointed out that my 7 year old daughter was present and to please stop the vulgar language. He did for a while then it came right back out. I asked again. He apologized, but in just a few minutes it started again.

So I stood up and got right next to him and asked him how he would like it if I slapped his mouth shut. His eyes got big, and he said to me. "Bill .... man .... you don't have to get ugly about it ..."

++++++++++++++++

Here's another story ......

Last year, I was at Samm' Family Restaurant in Florence. A young couple ( early 20's) came in and sat down to order food. The man was wearing a black T-shirt that read in 6 inch bold white letters:

F**K Y'ALL

I'M FROM TEXAS

Well, a rancher type guy and his family (wife & young kids) who had already ordered food, were sitting one booth down from this couple. I watched this rancher guy getting redder and redder in the face till he was almost fuming.

He finally got up and went over to the young man and told him that his shirt was offensive to him and his family, as well as offensive to the state of Texas. Then he went up to the cashier and told her that if that fellow stayed in there with that shirt on that he was leaving with his family - and never coming back - and to cancel their order. The cashier was kinda wishy-washy and not really wanting to make a call.

Thats when the owner, David, came out and saw what was going on. He then asked the man with the shirt to either change it or leave. The man said something about it being a free country and something about freedom of speech. Thats when David told him, "let's see how free you feel when the cops get here and throw your butt in jail. ( Small town Texas)

That's when the T-shirt man's girlfriend said to him. "See Bob, I told you this fu**ing town was all f**ed up." They left in a huff, slinging rocks from behind the tires as ther pick-up truck peeled out of the parking lot.

Is there a point to all this ? I dunno .... maybe you can find one.

Edited by Goey
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We left twi before POP. Well, I should say we were only peripherally involved. I never heard or received the spittle flinging, ear shattering, face melting, butt reaming, potty-mouthed fits of apoplectic rage often described here on GSC. So I wasn't even considering that aspect of how some would feel about vulgarity, rudeness, etc.

My apologies.

That being said, I do prefer that people just say what they're thinking straightforwardly...even if that means it comes out a la an lcm fit. I listen to folks who are just up front and honest with me.

Talk to me in 'sweet', 'understanding', 'polite' terms while you're dissing me...well !@^& ya. :biglaugh:

And, OH! Try coming off as one of the 'good guys/gals' when in truth you're just a sneaky, underhanded, manipulative, bigoted, arrogant, prejudiced, ignorant, controlling somethingorother...well, I'll just ignore ya.

Life is too short to give such people more than the 30 seconds or so it takes to see through them.

(See, David...my vocabulary really isn't all that 'limited'...I just LOVE to cuss. :biglaugh: I'm teasing ya, dude.)

What has been described here (the potty t-shirts, the persistent potty-mouth in front of children, such things) is not acceptable to me, either. Children are to be cared for, not exposed to things they don't need to be exposed to...especially if it is not acceptable to their parents. Other people have the right to general respect, too. My potty mouth usually does not show up until I am pretty sure that nobody is going to feel disrespected. I can usually tell...but if I'm being dense, I prefer somebody just ask me not to use such language around them...unless, of course, they are asking simply because they want to exert control in a situation...which is another subject...imo.

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Goey: When my kids were under 10 my wife and I would regularly (at least once per month)take them to restaurants for the purpose of teaching them that there's a different set of rules for behavior in someone else's place than there is at home. We felt it was successful. I don't know if that family man had a similar strategy, but he not only proved to his young kids that there's different rules for different places, but he also proved that just because someone is adult age doesn't mean they are mature, which is something that's GOT to confuse kids at some point. Samm's sounds like a good restaurant. Do they serve grits with jalapeno peppers in them? Kidding.

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Ditto on what many others have said - actions, honesty, etc are far more important than words used. Sometimes a well placed cuss word is a very effective way to make a point.

Being a Jersey truck driver, I wholly agree with this. There are just those times when only a hearty F YOU (with appropriate hand gestures, of course) will suffice. Admittedly though, I have cleaned up my normal speaking manner since moving to Michigan and not wanting to impress upon our two boys it is an acceptable way of expressing one's self.

Besides, you can say just about anything if you use the right words.

For example:

Instead of telling someone they have their head up their arse....you can say either......

"Oh, I see you suffer from cranial/rectal inversion disorder"

Or,

"I see your head is inserted in an orifice normally intended as an exit"

Since America seems to be getting stupider by the second, your stunned victim will have to THINK about what you've said, thus allowing you ample escape time.

:jump:

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"Is there a point to all this ? I dunno .... maybe you can find one."

It's the restaurant owners call...it's HIS private property and it should ALWAYS be his call whether it be language, behavior, apparel, smoking, non smoking, restrictions on patrons regardless of criteria race, sexual proclivities etc., carrying firearms etc etc etc. If patrons don't like the owners choices, they should patronize another establishment.

That's how freedom and free markets are suppoosed to work.

As for language, the only 4 letter word that bothers me...and it REALLY makes me feel uncomfortable...very, very disturbing...very hurtful...ESPECIALLY on teevee or the radio...makes me want to run and hide...SERIOUSLY.

I'm reluctant to even type it.

Okay...

I'll type it....but I won't say it...

here goes...

SNOW

There...I typed it....{gasp}

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Quick! Someone get the smelling salts!

Ron's fainted!

(Besides, Ron has just proved to us all that he ain't no Yankee. ... Why?

He is _not_ used to, and hates to say (or type) 'snow'.)

:D

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I'm sorry you all I have to confess that in real life I have a very potty mouth. I even use hand gestures when given the occasion. :blink:

But I will not lie, manipulate, gossip (well try not too), or try not to talk bad about someone.

I guess no one is a perfect angel... :who_me:

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I cuss occassionally (sp?).

but IMO -- it *cheapens* the conversation.

Makes a valid point from time to time, especially on the printed page ---

but I'm trying to work on a better vocabulary. ;)

Staring a person straight in the eye, and saying something *clean*,

makes your point quite well -- especicially if you need to get in their face, and do so.

(of course ---) It helps when you're tall like I am, and can look *down* to them. :spy:

IMO --- clean language (these days) is an asset.

But you won't find me denigrating those who chose to do otherwise.

Edited by dmiller
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