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Bought the whole ball of wax or not...


waterbuffalo
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I love the thread on labyrinths because unraveling the maze in our minds placed there by twi while we’re in recovery can be daunting.

For example, I’ve noticed that some posters consider themselves to be above falling for say the sexual predator piece, or piece A, but don’t stop long enough to consider that they fell hook, line, and sinker for the “earthly family” piece, or piece G, so to speak. Earthly Family? As if “believers” (twi followers, not the other Christians—piece C, let’s call it) were our true family. For gawd’s sake, our family is our family.

And while we’re being holier than thou about not being in debt, let’s call that piece U, we don’t realize that placing ourselves in subjection to another adult who was oh so happy to rule over us (let’s call that piece H) and in reality was never in any way, shape, or form a true bishop or elder, was man-pleasing and wrong.

I fell for a lot of the pieces, including the “earthly family” and “submitting to unholy ldrship” and many others.

What pieces did you fall for?

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I pretty much bought all of it - but that was when I was in as a kid...

One thing I never bought into was the idea that anyone who was exceptional in what they did and was not a part of twi had to be possessed.

Another one was the teaching that David had the right to Bathsheba because he was the king.. that one never made any sense to me.

As I grew up a lot of the other teachings sort of fell apart... especially after LCM was dethroned. Suddenly, since the MOG was brought down to a human level I realized there could be mistakes in all of it and all of it suddenly bore scrutiny.

Now I am not sure exactly WHAT I believe... still working through all of that in my head since we didn't leave all that long ago. There are a few things I do believe...

I believe that God exists and He loves.

I believe that freedom of will is more important than doing the right thing.

I believe that it is ok to not know the answer to everything.

I believe that truth can be found everywhere if you open your eyes.

I believe that no one is any more important or better than anyone else.

I believe in the two great commandments - love God and love your neighbor as yourself.

And a lot of these things are a far departure from my twi beliefs. I keep finding that underneath everything, at the very core of myself, I am not the person I once thought I was or that I tried so hard to be when I was in twi. It's a little weird to suddenly realize this in the middle of my adult life. Thankfully we got out before we had any children. Our kids will not be raised to believe all the lies that were shoved down our throats.

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Now I am not sure exactly WHAT I believe... still working through all of that in my head since we didn't leave all that long ago. There are a few things I do believe...

I believe that God exists and He loves.

I believe that freedom of will is more important than doing the right thing.

I believe that it is ok to not know the answer to everything.

I believe that truth can be found everywhere if you open your eyes.

I believe that no one is any more important or better than anyone else.

I believe in the two great commandments - love God and love your neighbor as yourself.

Wow. How cool is that?

Can't say I disagree with you on any of them, JJ. THANKS!

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All of it...every stinkin bit of it. The stuff that I questioned, I thought Satan was tricking me to doubt. The behavior I objected to, I endured because not to meant that I was stiff necked. Anything completely offensive or incomprehensible, I just assumed the lack was in my own understanding, and I would put on the back burner, like they said, until the day that I would be spiritually mature enough to handle it. :(

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i believed it all(hazy on the SIT part at first)but it was what I believed my calling at the "tender"

age of 18 yrs old.

Who knew 30 yrs down the road I would be warning people of The "ministry"(cough!)I so would

have given my life for to serve.

I believe now this whole ball of wax was a system designed just like a terrorist designs a chemical

that can wipe out a target he desires.

In this case the target was young,mostly middle class, white, educated people,and the Jesus movement

at the time just gave it that extra bonus round.

It was a whole ball of wax allright...like collected ear wax so impacted in your brain we were deaf to

anything else!

Let him that has ears hear.

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Thanks for this thread, waterbuffalo! It has just made me realize that I don't need a belief system that is so tight that I have specific beliefs regarding every little situation in life. I don't have to have a formula to live by - I don't have to have a concrete belief set in stone - I can just take things as they come and deal with them then.

FREE AT LAST to THINK FOR MYSELF - and to change things if I find out I was wrong!! WOOO HOOO!!

:dance:

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Wow, Rascal. Yes, I remember those feelings, hoping they wouldn't spiritually pick up on the parts I took for bs.

The scholarship I always thought was shoddy. And, a lot of what was taught sometimes made me think they taught it not because it was the truth, but because it was different than the way any other group taught the particular subject.

The part I really, really bought into more than anything else was the family of God concept. That really made sense to me and in my early years believed the way had it right--mainly because I'd never seen it really live anyplace else. Certainly not in the church I was brought up in. People did help each other out in my own family, but I never experienced anyone from the church coming over helping out if mama was in the hospital or anything like that. So, what I saw amongst the believers I believed was real.

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i believed it all(hazy on the SIT part at first)but it was what I believed my calling at the "tender"

age of 18 yrs old.

Who knew 30 yrs down the road I would be warning people of The "ministry"(cough!)I so would

have given my life for to serve.

I believe now this whole ball of wax was a system designed just like a terrorist designs a chemical

that can wipe out a target he desires.

In this case the target was young,mostly middle class, white, educated people,and the Jesus movement

at the time just gave it that extra bonus round.

It was a whole ball of wax allright...like collected ear wax so impacted in your brain we were deaf to

anything else!

Let him that has ears hear.

Hear, hear, OK City! :beer:

Thanks for this thread, waterbuffalo! It has just made me realize that I don't need a belief system that is so tight that I have specific beliefs regarding every little situation in life. I don't have to have a formula to live by - I don't have to have a concrete belief set in stone - I can just take things as they come and deal with them then.

FREE AT LAST to THINK FOR MYSELF - and to change things if I find out I was wrong!! WOOO HOOO!!

:dance:

I know, JJ. Loved what you said about freedom of will being more important than doing the right thing. Had to think about that one for a minute, but it totally makes sense!

Thanks for all your insights :dance:

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I also bought into the concept of the "household" of God as it was taught by LCM... that the Household was the most important group of people in the entire world... more important than my family, who I alienated when they were made mark and avoid.

I do believe that in some areas at least there was a genuine love of God in operation among the fellowships - that the love that people showed as they took care of each other was the real deal... but on the larger scale of twi, it never existed. In some ways, the genuine love showed among the fellowships was a great thing, but in other ways it just served to hide the true nature of twi. I know it did for me...

I still crave that sense of community - of having a large bunch of people who really seemed to care about me and be interested in my life - but I am not willing to give up my freedom of thought just to "belong" again. I don't know if I will ever really "belong" anywhere again, but it's becoming less and less important.

I was not exactly one of the "beautiful people" when I was going to school... not really popular, not really part of the in crowd... I sometimes think this is why I was willing to put up with so much to be a part of the community of twi.

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I still crave that sense of community - of having a large bunch of people who really seemed to care about me and be interested in my life - but I am not willing to give up my freedom of thought just to "belong" again. I don't know if I will ever really "belong" anywhere again, but it's becoming less and less important.

Yeah, JJ. A lot of us got stuck with more than we bargained for just to belong, didn't we?

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All of it...every stinkin bit of it. The stuff that I questioned, I thought Satan was tricking me to doubt. The behavior I objected to, I endured because not to meant that I was stiff necked. Anything completely offensive or incomprehensible, I just assumed the lack was in my own understanding, and I would put on the back burner, like they said, until the day that I would be spiritually mature enough to handle it. :(

Me too. If I was uncomfortable with something I just figured I was wrong. But there was one thing I refused to go along with. I wouldn't let those reflection people cut my hair just because they thought they had a better idea of what a minister for god should look like. I thought they looked like geeks and I liked my hair the way it was. Took some heat for that.

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Oh, I remember those haircuts...

Female WC haircuts numbers 1-5 - approved by God.

Male WC haircut number one - the only hair approved by God.

They had a reflections class where this married couple would pull people out of the audience and cut their hair however they wanted to. You were not supposed to refuse or have an opinion or preference. They also had people stand there in front of everyone and say what kind of clothes they should wear and what colors. Maybe they had some good advice and they didn't seem to be a mean couple. But their style was exactly that. Their style. Some of it was old fashioned and not for everyone. I saw some goofy hairstyles walk out of that class. :blink: :confused:

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They had a reflections class where this married couple would pull people out of the audience and cut their hair however they wanted to. You were not supposed to refuse or have an opinion or preference.

They did it a little different when I was in rez. Oh gosh, the lady would point people out in the audience and then ask them if they wanted to be redone. We weren't forced. I distinctly remember one person, at least, declining and admiring him/her for saying no. Most people did look better afterwards, but was happy not to have been selected for their experiment myself.

Sad to hear that it deteriorated into that. Horrible!

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I remember when they came and did a teaching session at FLO.

(Cheryl something or other?)

Well, as a guy, I have a genetic obligation to seem unconcerned with matters such as this, TWI or no TWI.

One thing they talked about, however, caught my attention.

They said you should always wear or have in your possession something that is particularly unique to you such as a locket from your Grandmother or a pocket watch from your favorite uncle, etc.

Deep southern culture has something similar to this called a "Mojo Bag".

It's a little sack that contains such items as a penny from the year of your birth along with staple ingredients that all mojo bags should have. It's part of your identity.

Personally, I always carry a harmonica with me, though it is usually out of sight and not always the same one. It's part of what makes me an individual rather than just another brick in the wall.

Try it some time. It's something you are aware of though no one around you has a clue.

It make you an "individual". I imagine that must have been very important back in the days of slavery.

Well, I know I deviated quite a bit from the intent of this thread and for that I apologize.

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I remember when they came and did a teaching session at FLO.

(Cheryl something or other?)

Well, as a guy, I have a genetic obligation to seem unconcerned with matters such as this, TWI or no TWI.

One thing they talked about, however, caught my attention.

They said you should always wear or have in your possession something that is particularly unique to you such as a locket from your Grandmother or a pocket watch from your favorite uncle, etc.

Deep southern culture has something similar to this called a "Mojo Bag". It's a little sack that contains such items as a penny from the year of your birth along with staple ingredients that all mojo bags should have. It's part of your identity.

Personally, I always carry a harmonica with me, though it is usually out of sight and not always the same one. It's part of what makes me an individual rather than just another brick in the wall.

Try it some time. It's something you are aware of though no one around you has a clue.

It make you an "individual". I imagine that must have been very important back in the days of slavery.

Well, I know I deviated quite a bit from the intent of this thread and for that I apologize.

So cool, so cool, waysider--a mojo bag!

Nice derailment :eusa_clap:

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Sorry

I didn't derail it on purpose. :redface:

To answer the question:

Yes, I bought "the whole ball of wax" for probably my first five years or so.

The wax started melting in front of me during the time I spent in Fellow Laborers.

A lot of it was gone by the time I graduated.

WARNING! Musical derailment to follow!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXp1hYM9kTk

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In a weird kinda way.. I felt it was 100 percent bullsheet from day one of my involvement.. the promise of being "family" being only an illusion of sorts..

I think I "went with the flow" so to speak.. path of least resistance, the path that would provide the greatest stability at the time..

does that make sense?

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Sorry

I didn't derail it on purpose. :redface:

To answer the question:

Yes, I bought "the whole ball of wax" for probably my first five years or so.

The wax started melting in front of me during the time I spent in Fellow Laborers.

A lot of it was gone by the time I graduated.

WARNING! Musical derailment to follow!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXp1hYM9kTk

Good choice in music waysider(I never did understand that song,but it fits here if only the bird

were vultures and vampire bats to represent way higher ups)and I felt sorry for that poor fish!

too felt like a fish out of water(symbolic of fisher of men or christian symbol of a fish you see on cars)

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I never bought the "ball of wax" about Athletes of the Spirit ...perhaps because I'm not athletic and I knew the Bible I had learned and been assured of was not dependent on my athletic ability ... and I figured God wouldn't limit His blessings to jocks. Early on in my years in TWI, a wonderful guy shared with me the verse, "God taketh not pleasure in the legs of a man" when I was thinking I wanted to stand for and with God, but I could not see myself getting up early and running in the morning every day for the rest of my life as part of it. It seems rather silly to write that or tell it now, but I was 18 at the time and to learn in a practical way that God was interested in my heart and not my legs/athletic ability was a great blessing to my life.

I found it amusingly ironic that either every or almost every great "athlete" that LCM brought in front of our faces as "a great athlete and a great believer" always ended up either leaving TWI when the hype died down, being caught with drugs, or, in the case of the woman tennis player, being found to be lesbian.

Now, many years later, the person many of us in the Corps learned Figures of Speech from has researched and proven conclusively that ALL the references in Ephesians 6 are military, not athletic. So there, O "spiritually" athletic ones!

Edited by DogLover
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The scholarship I always thought was shoddy. <B>And, a lot of what was taught sometimes made me think they taught it not because it was the truth, but because it was different than the way any other group taught the particular subject.</B>

I used to think that a LOT. Part of a line from that old classic song, Alice's Restaurant, by Arlo Guthrie came to mind frequently when I'd hear teachings..."A third posibility we hadn't counted upon" (That phrase always went thru my head in Arlo's voice and I NEVER, EVER attributed it to "the adversary"). It became obvious that we were being conditioned to accept these arbitrary "new lights" of wit, wisdom and brilliant research so as to believe we were privy to some inside information unavailable to the unwashed masses. I got this early on, but it became VERY obvious during the LCM years. It was a typical ploy used by many organizations and frequently by popular media to make people feel informed without actually informing them.

You're the first person that I've seen to express this.

As for buying into the ball of wax, I stuck around as long as I did because I made some wonderful friends, I enjoyed the small fellowships and learned a few useful things. I had read E.W. Bullinger before I ever heard of TWI and enjoyed being able to find others who studied and enjoyed Bullinger and I could wallow in it.

The main thing that offended me was the adoration of VPW and later, LCM and the perverse notion that whatever fell out of VPW's mouth equalled the Word of God if not superceding it. I got SOOO sick of hearing "Doctor sez...Doctor sez...Doctor sez" until it turned my stomach. This is why I have no interest in CFF or any other "Doctor sez" ministry. Even without all his sexual predations etc., he was still just some guy that read the Bible...nothing more. I felt that way then with no sense of guilt or having been "tricked" and I feel that way now.

Edited by Ron G.
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I never bought the "ball of wax" about Athletes of the Spirit ...perhaps because I'm not athletic and I knew the Bible I had learned and been assured of was not dependent on my athletic ability ... and I figured God wouldn't limit His blessings to jocks.
The Athletes of the Spirit teaching wasn't that God's blessings were limited to jocks and didn't refer to literal athletic ability. It was a figure of speech comparing our walk as believers to an athletic contest.
Now, many years later, the person many of us in the Corps learned Figures of Speech from has researched and proven conclusively that ALL the references in Ephesians 6 are military, not athletic. So there, O "spiritually" athletic ones!
Yup. This was one of those things that didn't make sense to me when I first heard it, but I "held it in abeyance" figuring I'd get spiritually smarter as time went on :thinking:

While there are some athletic references in the epistles, Ephesians 6 is military through and through. Karl K does a great job of dissecting this teaching in The Cult That Snapped.

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I never bought the "ball of wax" about Athletes of the Spirit ...perhaps because I'm not athletic and I knew the Bible I had learned and been assured of was not dependent on my athletic ability ... and I figured God wouldn't limit His blessings to jocks. Early on in my years in TWI, a wonderful guy shared with me the verse, "God taketh not pleasure in the legs of a man" when I was thinking I wanted to stand for and with God, but I could not see myself getting up early and running in the morning every day for the rest of my life as part of it. It seems rather silly to write that or tell it now, but I was 18 at the time and to learn in a practical way that God was interested in my heart and not my legs/athletic ability was a great blessing to my life.

I found it amusingly ironic that either every or almost every great "athlete" that LCM brought in front of our faces as "a great athlete and a great believer" always ended up either leaving TWI when the hype died down, being caught with drugs, or, in the case of the woman tennis player, being found to be lesbian.

Now, many years later, the person many of us in the Corps learned Figures of Speech from has researched and proven conclusively that ALL the references in Ephesians 6 are military, not athletic. So there, O "spiritually" athletic ones!

I never related to the athletic terminologies. It basically made me feel terrible just as it had when I was younger. I was always on the B string and the last kid ever picked for dodge ball. The ministries emphasis on athletics made me feel like a loser just like it had when I was a kid. I didn't get it, couldn't relate and had no talent. :unsure:

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As for buying into the ball of wax, I stuck around as long as I did because I made some wonderful friends, I enjoyed the small fellowships and learned a few useful things. I had read E.W. Bullinger before I ever heard of TWI and enjoyed being able to find others who studied and enjoyed Bullinger and I could wallow in it.

I learned a lot of useful things, too Ron. Way believers were smart (lots of 'em, anyway)!

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I took a fairly deep quaff of the Kool Aid but...

I could NEVER buy the Republican political stuff

No one was gonna make me believe Nixon was some sort of hero.

Or Trilateral cons piracy stuff

or "Bury a gun in your backyard, they're coming to get them!"

This aspect probably helped alienate me from TWI in about 1976-77.

I'm as patriotic as anyone....

and more patriotic than most.

(I've registered over 160 new voters this summer...

and I wear a flag lapel pin - that settles it, right?)

I was a politically liberal activist going in...

a silent political liberal while in...

and a political liberal activist since coming out.

I was a devout socially active Protestant going in...

a cult void-doid while in...

and then a devout socially active Protestant since coming out.

I was also an environmentalist in all three phases.

I attended the first Earth Day Celebration in Union Square, NYC

I notice my old friend, Kris S., did too.

Volvamos la "Madre de Presidentes" azul como el océano ... azul, el azul de la esperanza que canta toda la noche como un pájaro desquiciada.

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