I had some extremely off the wall dreams right after leaving and getting divorced. Major wild dreams. This on I dreamed over and over again for months: I was in an alley being beaten, kicked, spit on and cursed at by the Moneyhands and other wc leaders. It was so "real" I woke up crying, screaming and trying to protect my face.
I've had a some really scary ones like that and some more "odd" than scary, but all related in one way or another to TWI or my adjustment to life outside TWI. Therapy has helped a lot, but I still get chills and have impulse reactions to things that remind me of TWI, like you ran into with the woman with the tea.
All I can say is "Thank goodness for therapy and GSpot!" :D--> and "Thank God it does get better!"
Yeah Georgio, I do. It was a lot tougher on you little guys that grew up in twi....I am amazed at how well you have handled all of this...at least those of who got in at a later age, knew there was life outside of twi when things got to stinky:-(
I have dreams where I am on the wow field and I realise that this is wrong....but I made a commitment and God expected me to complete the year anyway.
I spend the whole dream just sick at heart going through the motions for God.
Sometimes I go back to Emporia and try to find out if they are still screwed up...
One time was cool though....in it, God came to me and said to witness for HIM...to be a secret agent and witness to people to get them OUT of twi instead.....my mission on the wow field was to get people OUT of twi ...lol
One time we led a commando type of mission to rescue Mrs. W, to get her outta that place.
Most dreams though, are of Rock of ages...I wander around trying to find old friends, I keep checking out the teachings hoping that things might have changed....they never do.
The prevailing theme is....looking for good, but not belonging...wishing that it was *good* so that I could go back.
Crazy eh? It has been over 15 years and I would never EVER want anything to do with twi...shudder.
Rascal I have dreams about The Rock all the time. I go back to where I always pitched my tent and walk around looking for people. Sometimes I don't recognize a soul. Sometimes I see old friends, and they haven't aged. Sometimes they're all older. Sometimes I am welcome, sometimes I get kicked out.
It's amazing the variations I have on the same dream. True to life , my emotions are mixed.
I had a dream once where I was standing around with a bunch of Way people and Art Garfunkel walked by and asked me if I wanted to hang around with him.
I told him no, I couldn't, I had to stay there with these people. But inside I REALLY wished I could go hang out with Art Garfunkel.
Another time, after I'd been in two hellish years in Mississippi, I was on the front patio reading the Bible but all I could think about was how mean my branch leader was.
Just thought of another dream. I'm at the ROA and a bunch of people are singing in a choir and my former branch leader (not the mean one) is saying to me, "Come on over here and sing with us, we really want you to join us."
And I'm standing there thinking, "Uh, no I don't think so."
My wife just reminded me of one where I go to the rock but they make me wear a yellow wrist band because my PFAL grad status has been revoked. I then spemd the whole time looking for VPW so he can get me a blue one. People keep reminding me he's dead , which makes me think the color of an armband really doesn't matter.
I love the Grafunkel dream! You want to do what you want to do, but TWI won't let you.
I don't have any way dreams now--it was too many chapters ago for me now-In fact i only remember having one way dream while I was even in the way.
It was the night I went WoW in 82 and we were driving to our destination in FL.,I fell asleep in the back seat----in the dream Wierwille was a used car salesman, complete with the white shoes, checkered paints and greasedback hair, He was standing in front of a bunch of beat up old clunkers saying "O Boy ! Have I got a deal for you!" like a real sleaze...
I passed it off
This was at a time when he was still pretty much revered, It took me until after I left about 7 years later to see how true that dream was . . .
The child molestation thread has given this topic new meaning. Let's just say, that the "flashbacks" part of my topic was understated.
dammit, it makes me so mad.
I once mentioned on waydale that we mini/junior corps had many "supervised" games of "truth or dare" where the dares got way out of hand. There was an "adult" there and it still got ridiculous. You cannot have a pack of repressed teens in a room (on undetected Gergio Jessio wine), overnight and expect anything else. That's what the adult is for! But there were no boundaries! Innocence was lost, people were hurt and forced to do things and these "adults" and/or "rovers" let it happen.
God am I upset right now. At least someone got some justice!
I don't have dreams or flashbacks, really. But I do have what I'd describe as mild panic attacks now and then when I feel like religion is being shoved down my throat in some way. Of course, there's nothing to *really* panic about in these situations, but it's like I'm transported back to this feeling I had as a kid of being totally trapped and forced into thinking a certain way.
The worst was during my parents' recent visit, when I'd walk out on the porch and see my dad reading Way books. My heart literally pounded and I felt clammy, ill and short of breath. A few times I had to walk back in the house, go off by myself for a bit and compose myself. When I told my boyfriend of these physical reactions, he couldn't believe it. He was shocked it affected me that deeply. It was totally irrational. I guess you could say it was a flashback, but more like a flashback of feelings.
I've had a similar, but much less severe reactions other times. For example, while sitting in a Catholic church once. And another time, when I ran into a sweet-seeming elderly neighbor on a walk, and as we were walking, she started pressing me really hard to come with her to church. I told her that I have my own beliefs and I'm very happy with them, thanks but no thanks. And she started pressing me really hard, prying and prodding and trying to guilt me into offering to give her rides to church and attend services with her, then hinting that I'd go to hell. I was utterly creeped out, she started to seem evil and I was on a walk so I had no immediate escape. It's happened a few other times too when religious stuff has come up.
I had dreams of seeing my fiance and his children while I was on probation. they broke us up. I would wake up crying or going to bended knees asking God to show me "How could they be so cruel" or If I was wrong please show me. I thought about this almost each waking moment.......then after probation wass over they said no......I was devistated......but slowly the dreams went away cause I know had to fight more for my own sanity. thanks to gs WAKING ME UP FROM A BAD DREAM.
I have been plagued with various "dreams" since parting from "the ministry" in 2000.
Most of them have involved abandonment in one form or another. I can only imagine the dreams of my two children who were raised under the influence of "the way".
I married twice while involved (1979-2000), both of the men were considered believers, and both ended in divorce. This along with the leadership acting like I never existed when I didn't produce "fruit" it is no wonder that my kids and myself still have relationship issues.
Even considering all the stress it was to get booted out of TWI, I don't recall having any dreams about it at all (and I was in for about 20 years). I STILL have dreams about being in high school and not knowing where my next class is, though!
It's never too late to mend those fences. :)--> My ex just reunited with his family after nearly 10 years of no contact thanks to the suggestion of a certain reverend jerk-wad.
Recommended Posts
Belle
Yeppers!
I had some extremely off the wall dreams right after leaving and getting divorced. Major wild dreams. This on I dreamed over and over again for months: I was in an alley being beaten, kicked, spit on and cursed at by the Moneyhands and other wc leaders. It was so "real" I woke up crying, screaming and trying to protect my face.
I've had a some really scary ones like that and some more "odd" than scary, but all related in one way or another to TWI or my adjustment to life outside TWI. Therapy has helped a lot, but I still get chills and have impulse reactions to things that remind me of TWI, like you ran into with the woman with the tea.
All I can say is "Thank goodness for therapy and GSpot!"
:D--> and "Thank God it does get better!"
Link to comment
Share on other sites
rascal
Yeah Georgio, I do. It was a lot tougher on you little guys that grew up in twi....I am amazed at how well you have handled all of this...at least those of who got in at a later age, knew there was life outside of twi when things got to stinky:-(
I have dreams where I am on the wow field and I realise that this is wrong....but I made a commitment and God expected me to complete the year anyway.
I spend the whole dream just sick at heart going through the motions for God.
Sometimes I go back to Emporia and try to find out if they are still screwed up...
One time was cool though....in it, God came to me and said to witness for HIM...to be a secret agent and witness to people to get them OUT of twi instead.....my mission on the wow field was to get people OUT of twi ...lol
One time we led a commando type of mission to rescue Mrs. W, to get her outta that place.
Most dreams though, are of Rock of ages...I wander around trying to find old friends, I keep checking out the teachings hoping that things might have changed....they never do.
The prevailing theme is....looking for good, but not belonging...wishing that it was *good* so that I could go back.
Crazy eh? It has been over 15 years and I would never EVER want anything to do with twi...shudder.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Georgio Jessio
Rascal I have dreams about The Rock all the time. I go back to where I always pitched my tent and walk around looking for people. Sometimes I don't recognize a soul. Sometimes I see old friends, and they haven't aged. Sometimes they're all older. Sometimes I am welcome, sometimes I get kicked out.
It's amazing the variations I have on the same dream. True to life , my emotions are mixed.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Ham
I used to dream about some pretty strange stuff too..
On really vivid one: I "worked over" both donna and rosie for what they did to God's people..
Still didn't get an apology, even in a stinking dream!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
rascal
Usually I cannot find anybody I know, I am always happy and proud because I have an rv to stay in...
I am always looking for familiar faces, hoping that twi has straightened up.
I am always just a little afraid that folks will find out that I don`t believe the same any more.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
outandabout
I had a dream once where I was standing around with a bunch of Way people and Art Garfunkel walked by and asked me if I wanted to hang around with him.
I told him no, I couldn't, I had to stay there with these people. But inside I REALLY wished I could go hang out with Art Garfunkel.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
outandabout
Another time, after I'd been in two hellish years in Mississippi, I was on the front patio reading the Bible but all I could think about was how mean my branch leader was.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
outandabout
Just thought of another dream. I'm at the ROA and a bunch of people are singing in a choir and my former branch leader (not the mean one) is saying to me, "Come on over here and sing with us, we really want you to join us."
And I'm standing there thinking, "Uh, no I don't think so."
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Georgio Jessio
My wife just reminded me of one where I go to the rock but they make me wear a yellow wrist band because my PFAL grad status has been revoked. I then spemd the whole time looking for VPW so he can get me a blue one. People keep reminding me he's dead , which makes me think the color of an armband really doesn't matter.
I love the Grafunkel dream! You want to do what you want to do, but TWI won't let you.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
think fish
i have no dreams about twi.
only fond memories of the chaos and damage i caused them in my wake when i left the wow field early.
a tale to be told another time.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
mstar1
I don't have any way dreams now--it was too many chapters ago for me now-In fact i only remember having one way dream while I was even in the way.
It was the night I went WoW in 82 and we were driving to our destination in FL.,I fell asleep in the back seat----in the dream Wierwille was a used car salesman, complete with the white shoes, checkered paints and greasedback hair, He was standing in front of a bunch of beat up old clunkers saying "O Boy ! Have I got a deal for you!" like a real sleaze...
I passed it off
This was at a time when he was still pretty much revered, It took me until after I left about 7 years later to see how true that dream was . . .
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Georgio Jessio
mstar1 that wasn't a dream, that was revelation!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Georgio Jessio
The child molestation thread has given this topic new meaning. Let's just say, that the "flashbacks" part of my topic was understated.
dammit, it makes me so mad.
I once mentioned on waydale that we mini/junior corps had many "supervised" games of "truth or dare" where the dares got way out of hand. There was an "adult" there and it still got ridiculous. You cannot have a pack of repressed teens in a room (on undetected Gergio Jessio wine), overnight and expect anything else. That's what the adult is for! But there were no boundaries! Innocence was lost, people were hurt and forced to do things and these "adults" and/or "rovers" let it happen.
God am I upset right now. At least someone got some justice!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Belle
(((((Georgio)))))
I'm speechless. Adults should be protecting kids not hurting and allowing them to get hurt.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
rascal
Damn Georgio, I wish we could make the bastards pay dearly for what they allowed to happen to you guys.
I am so very sorry that as adults, we were completely oblivious to the suffering of you children...you guys SHOULD have been protected.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
BluzieQ
I don't have dreams or flashbacks, really. But I do have what I'd describe as mild panic attacks now and then when I feel like religion is being shoved down my throat in some way. Of course, there's nothing to *really* panic about in these situations, but it's like I'm transported back to this feeling I had as a kid of being totally trapped and forced into thinking a certain way.
The worst was during my parents' recent visit, when I'd walk out on the porch and see my dad reading Way books. My heart literally pounded and I felt clammy, ill and short of breath. A few times I had to walk back in the house, go off by myself for a bit and compose myself. When I told my boyfriend of these physical reactions, he couldn't believe it. He was shocked it affected me that deeply. It was totally irrational. I guess you could say it was a flashback, but more like a flashback of feelings.
I've had a similar, but much less severe reactions other times. For example, while sitting in a Catholic church once. And another time, when I ran into a sweet-seeming elderly neighbor on a walk, and as we were walking, she started pressing me really hard to come with her to church. I told her that I have my own beliefs and I'm very happy with them, thanks but no thanks. And she started pressing me really hard, prying and prodding and trying to guilt me into offering to give her rides to church and attend services with her, then hinting that I'd go to hell. I was utterly creeped out, she started to seem evil and I was on a walk so I had no immediate escape. It's happened a few other times too when religious stuff has come up.
BluzieQ
Link to comment
Share on other sites
likeaneagle
I had dreams of seeing my fiance and his children while I was on probation. they broke us up. I would wake up crying or going to bended knees asking God to show me "How could they be so cruel" or If I was wrong please show me. I thought about this almost each waking moment.......then after probation wass over they said no......I was devistated......but slowly the dreams went away cause I know had to fight more for my own sanity. thanks to gs WAKING ME UP FROM A BAD DREAM.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GettingOverItAll
I have been plagued with various "dreams" since parting from "the ministry" in 2000.
Most of them have involved abandonment in one form or another. I can only imagine the dreams of my two children who were raised under the influence of "the way".
I married twice while involved (1979-2000), both of the men were considered believers, and both ended in divorce. This along with the leadership acting like I never existed when I didn't produce "fruit" it is no wonder that my kids and myself still have relationship issues.
Maybe my grandchildren stand a chance....
Edited by GettingOverItAllLink to comment
Share on other sites
TheEvan
It's NEVER too late to redeem broken relationships, GOIA.
Welcome to the 'spot.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GrouchoMarxJr
GOIA...Welcome to the cafe. Glad you're here.
:)-->
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GeorgeStGeorge
Even considering all the stress it was to get booted out of TWI, I don't recall having any dreams about it at all (and I was in for about 20 years). I STILL have dreams about being in high school and not knowing where my next class is, though!
George
And, yes, welcome GOIA!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Belle
WELCOME, GOIA!!
It's never too late to mend those fences.
:)--> My ex just reunited with his family after nearly 10 years of no contact thanks to the suggestion of a certain reverend jerk-wad.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Shellon
ROFL
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.