Four Years Ago

[Hope R.]

Actually, it was 4 years ago last week that we got the boot from TWI - July 22, 2000. I’d been waiting for about 5 years for the occasion and can’t tell you how relieved I was when it finally happened.

We were kicked out because of a series of correspondence between my husband (igotout) and the current TWI president. If you read the "Letters to Rosalie" keep in mind that we still have not received an answer from Ms. Rivenbark about John’s willingness to help the ministry get “back on track” (whether it ever was on track is really not the issue)! Funny, a few of the suggestions from the first letter have been implemented by TWI - yet he was never shown any appreciation for them or thanked for his attempts to make things better.

When I re-read these letters after 4 years of being away from TWI, I am more grateful than ever that I am no longer a part of it.

In the four years that have gone by - I’ve had to work hard to get rid of so many years of “Way-brain”. I began by stopping to think about my feelings on a subject instead of just reacting by running some TWI one-liner through my head. I began to express myself in ways other than spewing out rhyming bible verses that numbed my creativity. I saw that the world was much more diverse and complex than I had been taught it was. I began to see more shades of gray in my decision making and realized that looking at every situation in black and white was not always an option. There were more choices of thought - more ways of doing things - the world became a much larger place once I stepped outside the mental walls of TWI.

I am grateful for Waydale and Grease Spot for being there when I was still in and had to remain anonymous. I’m thrilled I was able to find old ex-Way friends and make so many new ones because of these sites. The one thing about TWI that I still appreciate is the people I’ve met and grown to know over the years, whom I would never have met had I not been in “the ministry”.

To those of you who are still in - especially you “old-timers”… Think about how small your world is - how narrow your mind has become. Think about what you’ve missed by staying in TWI’s womb. Have you grown spiritually in the past 10 years? Mentally? Have you become more or less tolerant of others? Do you have any empathy for those who are hurt or suffering - or do you feel they’re in their positions because they’re “unbelievers”? Do you care about anyone outside “the household”? Do you disassociate yourself with people because they have left TWI?

Are you angry about the way your life has turned out because you stayed in for so long? Do you feel good about yourself? Did you miss opportunities for a career? Investments? Home-ownership? Stability? Retirement income? Relationships?

What do you really have to lose by leaving TWI? Friends? If they “mark and avoid” you - then they’re not your friends and never were. Family? If they value those in TWI’s ranks more than their own flesh and blood - what kind of family is that? If they do end up disowning you because you leave - you probably have family members who you shunned in the past willing to welcome you back with open arms.

I was in TWI from the time I was 16 years old until I was 45. You do the math. My whole adult life was spent in The Way. Ya know what? I don’t miss it! I have a life - a zo? - life and all of its manifestations. I have friends - real friends who have never even heard of TWI who would give me the shirt off their backs if I needed it - no matter what I believe in! I’m closer with my “earthly” family members than I ever was - heck - I talk to my mom almost every day!

It’s not too late to change - no matter how old you are. It may be hard to overcome the indoctrination and the low self-esteem drilled into you by various teachings and leaders - but it’s worth the fight. It’s amazing what you can see once the scales fall off your eyes.

Edited July 28, 2004 by HopeRich

[Raf]

Four more years! Four more years! Four more years!

[Tom Strange]

Very nice letter ShegotJohn... very nice... you know what I wish...

...and Happy Anniversary!

[oldiesman]

Rosalie's response to John:

quote:

---

God bless you abundantly. I would like for you and Hope to come and visit us at headquarters. We’d house you and feed you, and show you around for a couple of days. This is the only way I know that could resolve your concerns. Come and see for yourself. Many of your points seem to reflect Internet defaming rather than what actually exists. I’d be happy to sit with you and discuss your suggestions.

---

I wonder what would have happened had John & Hope gone to headquarters? Probably the same result. But personally, I think I would have taken Rosalie up on her offer, if for no other reason than to communicate, personally, my discontent and suggestions. I think I would have played their game, one more time ...

:)-->

[George Aar]

What amazes me in retrospect is how small a world we crafted for ourselves in TWI.

For all the talk to the contrary, all the blather about how exciting life becomes when you're "doing THE WURD" and how limitless the things of God are, I found that my life got progressively smaller, more closed in, more hemmed in by superstitious adherance to supposed "tremendous truths".

Outside of the confines of religious thought I've discovered a HUGE world out here. There are whole arenas of thought, culture, philosophy and lifestyle that I'd have never known a thing about had I kept myself cloistered in some box of theological prohibitions. Oh, yeah, I could have HEARD about them, or seen them on a "National Geographic" special, but I couldn't have actually experienced any of it.

Religion is such a sad waste of life. Convinced that their path is the only correct one, and disdaining all others, one is left to view all of creation through a straw, and console yourself that this is the way God wants it.

Despite all the holy treatises that have been written to the contrary, the fact remains. This life may well be all we get. Do you really want to waste it playing church?

Icky...

[Shellon]

Hope and John and girls.... :D-->

[Oakspear]

Happy 4th Anniversary Hope & John!

John's letters to a Trustee were an inspiration for me to do the same, and set me on the path that resulted in me leaving TWI; his encouragement over the phone helped make the carp that followed a bit more bearable.

Thanks guys! :D-->

[Nottawayfer]

quote:

---

To those of you who are still in - especially you “old-timers”… Think about how small your world is - how narrow your mind has become. Think about what you’ve missed by staying in TWI’s womb. Have you grown spiritually in the past 10 years? Mentally? Have you become more or less tolerant of others? Do you have any empathy for those who are hurt or suffering - or do you feel they’re in their positions because they’re “unbelievers”? Do you care about anyone outside “the household”? Do you disassociate yourself with people because they have left TWI?

---

Oh my, are those some things to consider. Hope, had I seen that paragraph before I left, it sure would have made me think about my life. Since leaving twi, I've learned what compassion really is.

Hope, congratulations on your time of freedom and descaling of your eyes! It's good to be gray sometimes!;)-->

[Grizzy]

4 years?????

really????

Sometimes it seems like yesterday and other times like a whole lifetime ago!!!!!!!!

Oh the joy to breath freedoms fresh air!!!!!

Congrats to John and you and many more happy years!!!!!!

[shazdancer]

Sadly, Oldies, I think you are right that it would not have made a difference if Igotout and Hope had gone to Headquarters at Rosie's invitation. I found out about the TWI-II mindset the hard way, by marrying someone who was in after I'd been out for over 5 years. It wasn't "good versus best" in every decision, but rather "devil spirits versus God." Extreme black and white. Leaders are right because they are leaders. To disagree was to fight with God.

I gave TWI and Wierwille "one more chance," willingly, a lot of times. I was in for 12 years, and probably 3 of those were "one more chance" years. I gave the ex almost 10 "one more chance" years. I would not wish the same on Hope and Igotout. I think they withstood it all enough.

Regards,

Shaz

[gladtobeout]

Hope

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Anniversary to you and your family.

I'm sure you bring great encouragement to those who are still in and are reading greasespot.

I'm very happy for you.

[wonder1]

How come so many people voice there experiences as though it happens to evryone? I can not attest to any involvement but just curious of the quote.

[Raf]

That's true wonder. It's like those people who complain about pedophile priests. I mean, most Catholic priests are not pedophiles, and most Catholic bishops have not hidden or excused pedophile priests. So obviously, it's not a problem that needs to be addressed.

Thanks for helping me see the light, wonder.

[My3Cents]

Well said, Hope! Enjoy your anniversary.

[act2]

Hope, Happy Anniversary to you & Igotout. Isnt life GREAT away from twi?

I still believe in God, Jesus, & the Bible. I still pray often.

Thanks again for your words of wisdom.

[dmiller]

:)-->

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!

[outandabout]

Happy Anniversary.

As TWI gets farther and farther into the past it gets less and less anything to think about.

Yet, what it was to us in our lives cannot be denied.

For me, now that it's been many years since my liberation, I sometimes cannot even comprehend that so much of my life was so totally absorbed and taken over by that organization. It seems so unreal to me, like it was another person, but those were the years of my life that I spent that way.

But we go on and life goes on and we find that there is so much more than what we were confined to.

Congratulations on the four year mark of your liberation from TWI.

All the best to you and your husband and God bless you.

[Catcup]

Happy Anniversary, Hope & John.

What a long strange trip it was.

Congratulations for surviving your exodus intact!

For you folks from TWI who are lurking because you have felt the pinch from their restrictive lifestyle, you have no idea how much you are missing out on in life, love, and a relationship with God until you are completely OUT of that cult.

Thanks Hope, for sharing your stories and insights over the years.

[excathedra]

wonderful words, Hope. must have been hard for a northern gal to wait for the country boy to catch up ;)-->;)-->;)-->

**

oh oldies, you just wanna get "housed and fed" ;)--> (doesn't that sound weird or is it me?)

[Kit Sober]

HOpe and igotout,

Congratulations!!!!

And thank you for sharing your lives here at the Greasespot Cafe.

You are an inspiration.

Getting a life outside of twi is such an adventure:)-->

Thanks, again,

[igotout]

Now, I think you can see why I married her 22 years ago, even though our TWI Limb Leader at the time, Gerald W, told her "You can do better than him".

Edited August 1, 2004 by igotout

[Mr Moonlight]

Congrats John & Hope, It's been a few years since we've tossed back a few brews. Perhaps someday we'll do it again.

Still spit'n Kool aid out.

[Hope R.]

Okay, Mr. Moonlight - I'm taking the bait. Email me and tell me who you are. :)--> I'd like to recall those days as well.

John - I knew Gerald was full of sheet at the time - and knew there was no way I could have done better than you! xoxox

To everyone else - it amazes me how much I've learned (and unlearned) in four years, and how much further I need to go before I'm really free of the mental bonds that held me in TWI for so long. Thank you so much for all your kind words.

[ToadFriend]

Congratulations on your newer, freer life, Hope and John! I left on January 11, 1996, and it has been wonderful since then ... I go to a great home-based church (lots of former Way folks, as well as others) and it has been great to read other things, challenge wrong doctrine and practice, and rejoice in the newness of life we have each day....and I have a great job, too! The lily pad is quite nice these days!

TF