I am glad that I was (previously) active in TWI, but am glad to be out.
I voted for this because I don't think given ANY situation (good or bad) had been avoided in my life, that I would have turned out to be the person that I am today. Besides, not everything was negative while I was in, otherwise I wouldn't have lasted so long (almost 20 years).
In addition, I never would have given gs a second glance.
I don't regret my involvement in twi because I feel my eyes are more wide open due to my involvement. However, I do regret that it took my hard head to realize how corrupt and wrong they were before I decided to leave. I spent all of my 20s an 30s in that damn place.
Looks like the two major choices that people have voted for so far are: glad they were in and glad to be out; and regret ever being in TWI.
I could have said I regretted my time in TWI and even today, could easily look at having wasted my 20's and 30's in TWI and offshoots, but I have to ask myself where I would be if I had never been involved in TWI. I really don't think I would have gained great fame and fortune, and I believe, for my own life, that I would not have become as independent as I am today. I choose not to take up much of my time now looking back and lamenting what was, which I cannot change. There were good times and bad, but mostly a learning and growing process for me.
I do, however, deeply regret the pain and suffering that many people who post here at GS went through, and deeply regret that I had little or no idea of many of the things going on at that time. Had I known then what I know now, things would have changed for me much more quickly.
I also understand people's needs to vent and discuss and act as "town criers" of things that happened (and still happen) in TWI. It is a healing process that happens differently for each individual and for many, it takes the form of warning others at every opportunity, and there should be warnings. New people are always coming to GS, and those who are the most vocal and knowledgeable about the evil perpetrated in TWI should always have a voice.
My only connection to former TWI'ers now is through GS and a few friends I made while involved with CES, which I am no longer a part of. I greatly enjoyed the Weenie Roast last year and meeting a few GSers in person. I plan on doing that again this year.
Belle- Glad I got in ( set me up for a life of biblical curiosity, lots of good memories too, and good head on shoulders considering, and wonderful hubby).
Glad I got out!!!(Just not doing anything for me, and I see what bad happend to many, can't support that).
Oldies- I can't figure you out, actually. I enjoy your optimism, probably how my hubby would behave if he cared to post, but he doesn't.
He is still having problems leaving, so in a sense, holding me back, (I am out mentally), but without him, I consider us a "WE", I say "still tryin".
He misses the fellowship with beleivers.
He doesn't understand why he can't just go to twig and hear the Word and be blessed, and if anyone f*&^% with him or yells, like 5 years ago, he'll tell them where to go....!!!
I want him to make this decision on his own, not because :I say so!
He also wants an UNBIASED advice?
Anyone know the answer to that?
He can't go to leadership "cuz they'd convince to stay"
If he hangs here (GS), ya'll say "get out"....
One thing he hasn't done is examine ALL the evidence. Baby steps.
Bliss, I totally understand! I fought for five years and got real tired of reading comments like that from people who know not me nor my situation.
Some of them have never loved someone so much that they would be willing to go through what you are going through to try to save a relationship. Others just speak like idiots because that's what they are and yet others don't understand and some of those do not care to understand what someone is going through.
I commented or ignored the comments depending on the poster. ;)-->
Regarding unbiased advice? I would highly recommend contacting Raf and/or WordWolf privately and asking if they would be willing to talk and/or e-mail with your husband. Raf is a journalist and very good at presenting both sides of a situation. His research on PFAL and the Blue Book are two excellent examples of how he is able to objectively see the right and wrong in those works. Wordwolf has shown himself to be equally objective and logical.
IMO, they are both professionals, post logically from an educated stand point and do not (usually) allow their emotions to overrule their thoughts. (I hope y'all don't mind me recommending you. ;)--> )
If you'd like someone/oneS to discuss primarily the injustices and evil committed within TWI, then that's a few different people and I'd be happy to help you with the best people for that as well, privately. :)-->
Bliss, I understand the need to stay involved until you can exit as a couple. I did that. I wanted out for several years but hubby wanted to stay(" Where else would we go?") At the time he wanted to raise the kids in the Word. Things were really ugly then--mid to late nineties.
I didn't harp on it, but I would sometimes say something to try to make him see sense. One of the issues was our HFC and Hubby had been great friends way back in the old days. Hubby just didn't want to believe this guy was so warped.
I had seen several other divorces in our branch, and the enmity between the ex spouses was just sick and fueled by the leadership, a very poor situation for children. I did not see any advantage to that situation at all.
Hubby finally did see it, HFC showed his dislike of me a little to obviously...we saw how loving our earthy family, who we rarely saw, was to us and our kids...we remembered what it was liked to be loved.
...we saw how loving our earthy family, who we rarely saw, was to us and our kids...we remembered what it was liked to be loved.
That's pretty much a clincher, isn't it, Bramble? I felt so unloved and so cut off from my family while married and in TWI. I hadn't alienated them like my ex did to his family, but I also wasn't completely comfortable around them because my ex and TWI kept them at arms length since they weren't involved with TWI.
Through it all they were very loving and very accommodating to our demands and weird schedules. Our relationship is 1000000 times better now that TWI isn't in the middle of it.
Interesting that most all choices are 50% Good time while in and glad to be out and 50% Regret even being in and glad to be out.
Not one vote for glad to be in or wishing to be in. Speaks loud and clear to me. What do you think, Mr. Linder? Moneyhands?
Funny- at an early point in my ministry career, my dad ran into someone that told him the Way
was cultish and won't let people have freinds outside.
My dad then posed that question to me the moment I got off the plane from taking my first Adv. class!!!
I screamed NO!!
That is not true.......then I quietly looked at my life and said, "if it's not true, then where are all my olm man friends?"
Of course I rationalized it away, like they were bad influence...blah blah...
That should've been more apparent to me, but they never said "thout shall NOT", only assumed and implyed as you got more heavily 'commited'.
I knew not to disown my family, however I was very relectant to keep witnessing to them in the late 90's because I didn't want to have
to "mark and avoid them".
(I knew my Pa would've never let anyone yell at him, hello?) So of course he wouldn't have lasted long was my logic. So leave good well enough alone.
Now that I think about it, my PA always asked me questions like "so, what kind of car does The Rev. Marinfail drive? where does he live? and how much money does he make? What does the Way do for poor people?"
I used to be so exhausted just trying to defend everything... truth be told, I never had any of those answers, except for the house one.
Bliss, does yer PA have any Mississippi relatives? He sounds just like my Daddy! Same questions and everything.
I remember him asking, "So, what does Moneyhands do all day?" Shoulda heard the flubbering trying to answer that one! LOL! Well, he goes swimming, Dottie takes tap dance lessons, shops, goes to watercolor classes..... Well, I don't know but it MUST be important because they pay him full time pay and let him live in a really, really nice home and drive nice cars....
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bliss
You forgot
Still tryin to get out
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moony3424
I am glad that I was (previously) active in TWI, but am glad to be out.
I voted for this because I don't think given ANY situation (good or bad) had been avoided in my life, that I would have turned out to be the person that I am today. Besides, not everything was negative while I was in, otherwise I wouldn't have lasted so long (almost 20 years).
In addition, I never would have given gs a second glance.
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skyrider
I regret my involvement in twi.
I DEEPLY regret ever signing to go corps.
Thankfully, I was never in the inner circle of evil with eyes wide open to this corruption.
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Nottawayfer
I don't regret my involvement in twi because I feel my eyes are more wide open due to my involvement. However, I do regret that it took my hard head to realize how corrupt and wrong they were before I decided to leave. I spent all of my 20s an 30s in that damn place.
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Outin88!
Wyafer Not said;
I agree. I'm not so niave (SP?) as I once was.
Also I met my wife while I was with the cult and not knowing any Bible, did learn some, even thought IMO half they taught was erroneous.
I met some wonderful people and made some good friends which I don't regret either.
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markomalley
Sorry, only 5 possible choices.
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wwjesuslaughat
Looks like the two major choices that people have voted for so far are: glad they were in and glad to be out; and regret ever being in TWI.
I could have said I regretted my time in TWI and even today, could easily look at having wasted my 20's and 30's in TWI and offshoots, but I have to ask myself where I would be if I had never been involved in TWI. I really don't think I would have gained great fame and fortune, and I believe, for my own life, that I would not have become as independent as I am today. I choose not to take up much of my time now looking back and lamenting what was, which I cannot change. There were good times and bad, but mostly a learning and growing process for me.
I do, however, deeply regret the pain and suffering that many people who post here at GS went through, and deeply regret that I had little or no idea of many of the things going on at that time. Had I known then what I know now, things would have changed for me much more quickly.
I also understand people's needs to vent and discuss and act as "town criers" of things that happened (and still happen) in TWI. It is a healing process that happens differently for each individual and for many, it takes the form of warning others at every opportunity, and there should be warnings. New people are always coming to GS, and those who are the most vocal and knowledgeable about the evil perpetrated in TWI should always have a voice.
My only connection to former TWI'ers now is through GS and a few friends I made while involved with CES, which I am no longer a part of. I greatly enjoyed the Weenie Roast last year and meeting a few GSers in person. I plan on doing that again this year.
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Pirate1974
I regret that I ever even heard of the way.
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dmiller
I took the gold, and left Egypt.
David
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TheInvisibleDan
They took my gold. And I never even stepped into Egypt.
Though I did see the King Tut exhibit in NY in the late 70s.
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WordWolf
I USED to say
"I was glad I got in, and glad I got out."
However,
I've seen what damage was wrought by them in God's name.
I've seen the complete twisting of people's minds to the point
that they're 180-degrees removed from Godly action, and claim
they're doing the right thing.
In short, the shrill screaming of
"how dare you complain it was less than perfect"
has convinced me that there was a lot MORE damage-much of it
psychological and PERMANENT-than I previously thought.
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Belle
Since I have absolutely no lemonade to share with anyone, I have chosen wish I was never involved.
Bliss, IF you were already out, which choice would you pick?
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oldiesman
Glad having been involved, and glad to be out.
:)-->
Do or do not.There is no try!
Yoda.
;)-->
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bliss
Belle- Glad I got in ( set me up for a life of biblical curiosity, lots of good memories too, and good head on shoulders considering, and wonderful hubby).
Glad I got out!!!(Just not doing anything for me, and I see what bad happend to many, can't support that).
Oldies- I can't figure you out, actually. I enjoy your optimism, probably how my hubby would behave if he cared to post, but he doesn't.
He is still having problems leaving, so in a sense, holding me back, (I am out mentally), but without him, I consider us a "WE", I say "still tryin".
He misses the fellowship with beleivers.
He doesn't understand why he can't just go to twig and hear the Word and be blessed, and if anyone f*&^% with him or yells, like 5 years ago, he'll tell them where to go....!!!
I want him to make this decision on his own, not because :I say so!
He also wants an UNBIASED advice?
Anyone know the answer to that?
He can't go to leadership "cuz they'd convince to stay"
If he hangs here (GS), ya'll say "get out"....
One thing he hasn't done is examine ALL the evidence. Baby steps.
He wants to know who Paw is?
:P-->
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Belle
Bliss, I totally understand! I fought for five years and got real tired of reading comments like that from people who know not me nor my situation.
Some of them have never loved someone so much that they would be willing to go through what you are going through to try to save a relationship. Others just speak like idiots because that's what they are and yet others don't understand and some of those do not care to understand what someone is going through.
I commented or ignored the comments depending on the poster.
;)-->
Regarding unbiased advice? I would highly recommend contacting Raf and/or WordWolf privately and asking if they would be willing to talk and/or e-mail with your husband. Raf is a journalist and very good at presenting both sides of a situation. His research on PFAL and the Blue Book are two excellent examples of how he is able to objectively see the right and wrong in those works. Wordwolf has shown himself to be equally objective and logical.
IMO, they are both professionals, post logically from an educated stand point and do not (usually) allow their emotions to overrule their thoughts. (I hope y'all don't mind me recommending you.
;)--> )
If you'd like someone/oneS to discuss primarily the injustices and evil committed within TWI, then that's a few different people and I'd be happy to help you with the best people for that as well, privately.
:)-->
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bliss
You crack me up Belle,
I'll pm you soon
;)-->
bliss
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Bramble
Bliss, I understand the need to stay involved until you can exit as a couple. I did that. I wanted out for several years but hubby wanted to stay(" Where else would we go?") At the time he wanted to raise the kids in the Word. Things were really ugly then--mid to late nineties.
I didn't harp on it, but I would sometimes say something to try to make him see sense. One of the issues was our HFC and Hubby had been great friends way back in the old days. Hubby just didn't want to believe this guy was so warped.
I had seen several other divorces in our branch, and the enmity between the ex spouses was just sick and fueled by the leadership, a very poor situation for children. I did not see any advantage to that situation at all.
Hubby finally did see it, HFC showed his dislike of me a little to obviously...we saw how loving our earthy family, who we rarely saw, was to us and our kids...we remembered what it was liked to be loved.
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Belle
That's pretty much a clincher, isn't it, Bramble? I felt so unloved and so cut off from my family while married and in TWI. I hadn't alienated them like my ex did to his family, but I also wasn't completely comfortable around them because my ex and TWI kept them at arms length since they weren't involved with TWI.
Through it all they were very loving and very accommodating to our demands and weird schedules. Our relationship is 1000000 times better now that TWI isn't in the middle of it.
Interesting that most all choices are 50% Good time while in and glad to be out and 50% Regret even being in and glad to be out.
Not one vote for glad to be in or wishing to be in. Speaks loud and clear to me. What do you think, Mr. Linder? Moneyhands?
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rascal
Gawd I could not ever imagine going back to that mess Belle, I think you are right...it says a lot.
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bliss
Funny- at an early point in my ministry career, my dad ran into someone that told him the Way
was cultish and won't let people have freinds outside.
My dad then posed that question to me the moment I got off the plane from taking my first Adv. class!!!
I screamed NO!!
That is not true.......then I quietly looked at my life and said, "if it's not true, then where are all my olm man friends?"
Of course I rationalized it away, like they were bad influence...blah blah...
That should've been more apparent to me, but they never said "thout shall NOT", only assumed and implyed as you got more heavily 'commited'.
I knew not to disown my family, however I was very relectant to keep witnessing to them in the late 90's because I didn't want to have
to "mark and avoid them".
(I knew my Pa would've never let anyone yell at him, hello?) So of course he wouldn't have lasted long was my logic. So leave good well enough alone.
Now that I think about it, my PA always asked me questions like "so, what kind of car does The Rev. Marinfail drive? where does he live? and how much money does he make? What does the Way do for poor people?"
I used to be so exhausted just trying to defend everything... truth be told, I never had any of those answers, except for the house one.
Go figure...
Bliss
Hey Belle check your PT's if I did it right.
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Belle
Bliss, does yer PA have any Mississippi relatives? He sounds just like my Daddy! Same questions and everything.
I remember him asking, "So, what does Moneyhands do all day?" Shoulda heard the flubbering trying to answer that one! LOL! Well, he goes swimming, Dottie takes tap dance lessons, shops, goes to watercolor classes..... Well, I don't know but it MUST be important because they pay him full time pay and let him live in a really, really nice home and drive nice cars....
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George Aar
I'm just one huge sack of regret right now.
But, yeah, ....ing away my existence for fifteen years in WayWorld was probably the biggest thing that f&**(ed up my life.
That and another choice I made...
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Ham
George, at least some of us that came out of that ....hole don't have to beat ourselves up any more just because we're miserable..
When I'm miserable now, at least I can enjoy it.
:)-->
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frank123lol
hell yes,When I am miserable now I only got myself to blame:Not having to please some Jacka##
Oh God,the work of the ministry
If it to be it is up to me,
oh shi# aint gonna get done now
Too bad I was not the man I knew to be
Jezz louise no wonder I was flippin nuts now I am just crazzzzzeeee
it is more fun now,you and God not some monkey on my back called twi
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