You may be a twi tool if you schedule your day in 15 minute increments and keep to that schedule just in case somebody comes over to check on you. You must be a tool if in that schedule you detail your "private time" with your spouse.......Or - - if you must ask permission to start or add to your family!
You might be a TWI tool if you save all year, quit your job to drive three days in the summer heat to spend two weeks in sweltering humidity in a tent with a few hundred other people in "scenic" Northern Ohio where the water tastes like.... All this so you can have the "blessing" of "volunteering" to do a menial job and to have the privilege to sit all day in another tent listening to men of God wannabees spouting their pseudo wisdom.
You also might be a TWI tool if when you return home from said event, you talk about what a blessing it was to attend when your non-twi neighbor comes over to show you pictures of their trip to Disney World, or Cancun.
You are definitely a tool of TWI if when you look at these pictures of folks having fun while swimming in crystal blue water by lovely waterfalls you think, "What a waste of time! I spent my vacation serving God!!"
You are still comforted and encouraged when "the man" puts down people who are not trying to do anything but bring up relevant issues. For instance; He/she will just fade away, or I have already forgotten more scripture than _________ will ever know, or he/she is unqualified, or he/she isn't ready, or you'll be a Greasespot by midnight.
unless they are Tom Baker, Peter Davidson, Colin Baker, Slyvester McCoy, Paul McGann, Christopher Ecclestron, David Tennant, or Mathew Lucas(or William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee)
You may be a Way Ministry tool if you are afraid to sign in to Greasespot as anything other than a "guest". Living in fear is really not what God had in mind.
You insist on thinking that there is good in TWI to hold onto even after you realize that the ones who promoted that view are the same ones who have manipulated and abused many people for several decades.
There was a VP statue???? must have been long after we left... and how appropriate that it had an erection!
Sad but true. It was about 8 inches high and bronze. He was holding a Bible in one hand and his glasses in the other. Of course, VP was on a pedestal. ;) Can't remember what the pedestal said. Maybe someone here remembers? They were pushing these things forever. I think they had a lot made and they didn't sell. After all, if you don't have money to eat, $200 for a statue was a stretch. I never saw many in other people's houses. Actually, I'm not sure I EVER saw another one.
I didn't have the statue, but we did have the trustee print in a nice frame. Still have the frame. Also hed those yearly theme posters in cheap frames. Now I have western wilderness pictures on my living room walls.
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JeffSjo
You may be a TWI tool if...
While correcting ettiquette errors at the dinner table you habitually yell and have food spewing out of your mouth.
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Shellon
EW
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JustThinking
You may be a TWI tool if...
If you stand and applaud someone who is on the phone.
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waysider
You may be a TWI tool if----
You still refer to a certain someone as "Doctor".
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GrouchoMarxJr
You may be a twi tool if, when you give someone your opinion on something...it sounds word for word like the latest twi teaching tape.
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crystalclearblue
LOL. Or if you drive from a 250 mile radius to do it at a play back.
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krys
You may be a twi tool if you schedule your day in 15 minute increments and keep to that schedule just in case somebody comes over to check on you. You must be a tool if in that schedule you detail your "private time" with your spouse.......Or - - if you must ask permission to start or add to your family!
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chockfull
You might be a TWI tool if you act holy but lie about people to save yourself.
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WordWolf
And, word for word, it's the same answer everyone ELSE in twi gives to the same question....
especially if the answer doesn't actually ANSWER THE QUESTIOM, but EVADES it.
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Broken Arrow
You might be a TWI tool if you save all year, quit your job to drive three days in the summer heat to spend two weeks in sweltering humidity in a tent with a few hundred other people in "scenic" Northern Ohio where the water tastes like.... All this so you can have the "blessing" of "volunteering" to do a menial job and to have the privilege to sit all day in another tent listening to men of God wannabees spouting their pseudo wisdom.
You also might be a TWI tool if when you return home from said event, you talk about what a blessing it was to attend when your non-twi neighbor comes over to show you pictures of their trip to Disney World, or Cancun.
You are definitely a tool of TWI if when you look at these pictures of folks having fun while swimming in crystal blue water by lovely waterfalls you think, "What a waste of time! I spent my vacation serving God!!"
Edited by erkjohnLink to comment
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JeffSjo
You may be a TWI tool if...
You are still comforted and encouraged when "the man" puts down people who are not trying to do anything but bring up relevant issues. For instance; He/she will just fade away, or I have already forgotten more scripture than _________ will ever know, or he/she is unqualified, or he/she isn't ready, or you'll be a Greasespot by midnight.
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JustThinking
OMG, you win! Much better!
JT
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JustThinking
You may be a TWI tool if.....
... you spent money on a class but not your brakes which are worn out and need replaced.
... you have ever tried to "Mark and Avoid" the internet.
... you ever raved about WOW burgers.
... you only socialize with people at functions who had ministry name tags. (Not newbies)
... you miss once-in-a-lifetime events with your kids to attend a class you've taken more times than you can count.
JT
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crystalclearblue
Thanks, I'm honored.
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Thomas Loy Bumgarner
unless they are Tom Baker, Peter Davidson, Colin Baker, Slyvester McCoy, Paul McGann, Christopher Ecclestron, David Tennant, or Mathew Lucas(or William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee)
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Shifra
You may be a Way Ministry tool if you are afraid to sign in to Greasespot as anything other than a "guest". Living in fear is really not what God had in mind.
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Watered Garden
WG
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Shifra
Hi Garden Girl! Just thought I'd check in to the Cafe for awhile. Nice to see that you're still fighting the forces of evil ... the Way, that is.
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hollyc
OMG! WOW burger! That is great!!!
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JeffSjo
You may be a TWI tool if...
You insist on thinking that there is good in TWI to hold onto even after you realize that the ones who promoted that view are the same ones who have manipulated and abused many people for several decades.
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JustThinking
You ARE a TWI tool if...
You bought one of the VPW statues for about $200. (Did I get that price right?) The one that had an erection? OMG, what a tool I was!
JT
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leafytwiglet
There was a VP statue???? must have been long after we left... and how appropriate that it had an erection!
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JustThinking
Sad but true. It was about 8 inches high and bronze. He was holding a Bible in one hand and his glasses in the other. Of course, VP was on a pedestal. ;) Can't remember what the pedestal said. Maybe someone here remembers? They were pushing these things forever. I think they had a lot made and they didn't sell. After all, if you don't have money to eat, $200 for a statue was a stretch. I never saw many in other people's houses. Actually, I'm not sure I EVER saw another one.
Any other tools have one of those?
JT
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Bramble
I didn't have the statue, but we did have the trustee print in a nice frame. Still have the frame. Also hed those yearly theme posters in cheap frames. Now I have western wilderness pictures on my living room walls.
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