I've never had to have a pet put to sleep, but from much exposure to the world of AKC breeders through all my stuff with Vixen, I've heard it likened to the "How do you know when you're in love?" question. The answer is "you just know"..... I know that doesn't help, but maybe it does. :(
You love your pet and he's a part of the family, so there's a bit of denial that's normal and expected. I have always thought in my own situation, that Vixen is very independent and if she couldn't take care of herself when I'm not around during the day, that she would be miserable and I would worry that something might happen while I'm not there to help or protect her. That's when I think I would have her put to sleep. She would be able to die with dignity and still being the wonderful pet that I've come to love so much.....not totally wiped out, incapacitated and miserable.
IMO, my neighbors who are like grandparents to me, waited too long to put Bettler, their schnauzer, to sleep. He would fall down and not be able to get back up. When they went out of town, I was over there every hour because I was scared to death that he might fall and hurt himself while I was gone.
I dunno, maybe you do "just know". Regardless, I'm praying for you, Sushi, your wonderful boys and that four-legged member of your family and how difficult this time must be for all of you.
Whoa Abigail, my heart goes out to your family - that includes your dog...These wonderful creatures become part of our family - like one of our kids. I think THEY think they're one of our kids. A Great Dane/Aussie Mix sounds like a big dog - and to be 15 years old. I often hear big dogs don't live as long...We had a Lab/Springer Spaniel. Sweetest dog in the world - when getting shots at the Vet's office she'd lick him....SHe got to be 14 years old, had tumors, problems controlling bowels, etc. It was hard to do - but my son [she was a Christmas present to him] finally decided the most loving thing to do was have her put to sleep...
An animal has no sense of death. They will stay alive simply because you want them to. The hardest thing for us humans is knowing the pain that will be caused within us by their loss. But sometimes we have to make that choice for them, since they can't. And you will know in your gut when that time comes.
"When they went out of town, I was over there every hour because I was scared to death that he might fall and hurt himself while I was gone."
Belle, that is one of our concerns. We usually travel to the U.P. in the summer without our dogs. I have a neighbor who takes care of them when we are gone, but Scrappy always is miserable when we go on our summer trip. I am worried about how he will do without us this summer and how we and our neighbor would feel if something happened while we were away.
"oh i know folks who carried their doggies up and down the stairs because doggie wasn't in pain, he just couldn't do the steps anymore"
That's one of the things we are struggling with too ExC. There was a time when he used to groan when getting up - we knew it was his hips. But he seemed fine other than that one groan while getting up from laying down. He doesn't grown anymore, which is part of what makes us think he's not really in pain - that he's basically just not feeling much of anything at all on his back end. But we aren't totally sure either.
" A Great Dane/Aussie Mix sounds like a big dog - and to be 15 years old. I often hear big dogs don't live as long...We had a Lab/Springer Spaniel. Sweetest dog in the world - when getting shots at the Vet's office she'd lick him....SHe got to be 14 years old, had tumors, problems controlling bowels, "
Yeah - he's big - was nearly 80 pounds once - now is only about 65 give or take a couple. He has tumors too, but not cancerous ones - just fatty tissue. The vet said if he does have a degenerative nerve disorder he will start having problems controlling his bowels at some point too.
These thread about our pets always pull at my heart strings. Carol and I had two Cocker Spanials that we lost if that's the right word. Carol had gotten Abby shortly before we started dating. She was full of vim and vigor as a puppy. We got married and Abbie was jealous of me, I think. She slept at the foot of our bed and seemed to resent me at first but we bred her with a championship Cocker and kept the "pick of the litter"... and we named her Lady.. after the "Lady" in Lady And The Tramp.
So we had Abby and Lady even before we had our children.. and our children grew up not knowing life without there being an Abby and Lady to love on and pet. But they both grew old and finally one day I had to take Abby in to have her put to sleep. She was no longer able to walk because of paralysis in her hind quarters which meant she couldn't get up to go to the bathroom. I didn't mind cleaning her up every day but I could tell... and I know this might seem ridiculous to some... that it bothered HER that I had to do it for her. She was old and paralyzed. I had to take her to the vet for the very last time.
I carried her out to the car in my arms since she really couldn't walk and placed her on the front seat where she loved to ride. She LOVED going for a ride in the car. So I drove around a bit.. taking the long way to the vet all the while rubbing her head and telling her how much I loved her. You all can't imagine how tough that was for me knowing it was a one way trip for Abby. That I would never again have the pleasure of doting on my adorable little dog. Did she somehow know that this was her last ride in her life? In the past she knew that we took her to the vet when she was sick and then when she went home she was better. Did she think we were taking her to the vet for her to get better? My heart was breaking but I wasn't going to show it to Abby. No, I was petting her and talking to her like it was old times and she was just going to get shots and some medicine. I was going to make sure that her last hours on Earth were happy ones.
Gawd, I can't get through this, Abigail. Its too painful still. Let me just say that you are right to be concerned about the quality of life issues. We have to be able to do this as the last caring act for our loved pets.
The decision to put a pet to sleep is one of the hardest. Almost one year ago we had to pur our Hershey down. He had a cancerous tumor in the roof of his mouth. It knocked out one of his back teeth, and he had blood coming out of his nose because the tumor was way out of control before we noticed it.
Our vet told us that if he started to lose weight or if the bleeding in his nose became regular that it was time for us to depart with our beloved. We fed him whatever his heart desired. We loved him big all the time, but we loved him EXTRA BIG after we found out he may not be around much longer. At the point the vet gave us the advice, we had no idea how long it would be. It was about a month.
I would try getting a second opinion from another vet and ask the vet what would be a deciding factor to be the most humane from your dog. The hardest part of making the decision was because we didn't want to let him go.
It is the most painful thing to let go of our furry friends but Belle is right You just know.....A poem from a dogs view maybe.
The Last Battle
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
and pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this--the last battle--can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
Don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
What is to come can hold no fears
You'd not want me to suffer, so.
When the time comes, please let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me til the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
it is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We've been so close--we two--these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.......
And a owner.........
I Love You This Much
Written by Penny Cary
Suggested by Colleen Gentilcore, Suntera Shelties
When you were just a pup, and you were new to home and heart, I used to laugh so hard and pick you up and hold you squirming and struggling in my arms and whisper to you "I love you this much."
I laughed as you tried to rid yourself of those pesky tapes and watched as you struggled through the puppy stuff, and mostly I didn't mind for I knew that puddles turned to piddles, and piddles would soon pass.
I even managed to grin when you decided that our house should be free of all wood products, and we fought constantly to decide who was right about the crate. I guess you were because I cannot imagine not having you at the foot of my bed at night. I don't know how I would have made it from room to room without your guidance or stood erect without your silken head to rest my hands on, but then, I never had to.
And I smiled a lot as you grew and decided that squirrels were indeed evil, and that there was no really good reason for cats; that every dog in the neighborhood posed a potential threat and needed to be sent packing.
And I was delighted when you discovered children, and you found they were much like you - they liked to run; they liked to play; and there was an endless quality to the day when they were around.
You and I as adults together developed a deep and abiding respect for one another. Your constant devotion made life's valleys a little less deep, and there were times when I needed you: to listen, to love and to lick away the tears... and you were always there.
You liked Chinese food, spaghetti and cheese. Lettuce and pickles and heartworm pills were for other dogs. We adventured, you and I. We camped, we fished, we hiked, and we played ball. Oh, did we play ball.
And through all those years, you gave so much, and I could only hold you in my arms at the end of each day, and we'd both smile, and I would whisper "I love you this much."
And now we've come to this. I don't believe I have the strength to say goodbye, but you tell me it's time. Neither one of us has smiled in a very long time, and the only part of you that doesn't indicate pain is your stubby little tail. I cried when the doctor told me, and I railed against the Powers That Be, and all the platitudes in the world and all the comforting friends can't make up for the undeniable fact that you will no longer be with me. And I don't think I can do this. I envy those with ones who passed so quickly. The shock must numb the grief.
But now, as I have done so many, many times before through so many, many years, I fold you in my arms, lay my head upon your velvet cheek, and whisper one last time, "I love you this much."
My heart goes out to you. It's such a hard time and decision. I agree with everyone above, you will know when the time is right. Look at it through your dear pets eyes, not yours. Let them go when they are ready, not when you are ready to say goodbye, because you may wait too long.
We kept our dear Abby too long. We were keeping her in the bathroom off the kitchen because she could no longer walk, and thus laid around all day. Every day when we returned home, she would be in her excrement, and we had to bathe her. The last Friday, as I picked her up to bathe her, her hip bone protruded through her skin, and my heart broke as I realized I had waited too long. She had no feeling in her hind quarters, so I do not think she was in pain. Her tail was still wagging, and joy was still in her face because I was home and loving and caring for her.
That night we had a farewell party for her. Each family member visited with her one by one, loved on her, and told her good-bye.
The next morning, my dear husband took her to the vet. I was so thankful he did that, as I don't think I could have gone. When the children and I awoke, Abby had been put to sleep. Sudo had her in a box "casket" and we took her out the the family pet burial grounds at his parents house, and had a funeral for her. It was a dreary, rainy day, as if the world was mourning her loss with us. I will always remember that day, and how sorry I was that I had held on to her too long. I wish my last memories of her were of a whole body, not a broken one.
I will keep you, and all your family, including your beloved pet, in my prayers.
Abigail, Ohh it is such a tough decision to make and I having to send some of my puppers to the Rainbow Bridge. I know how you feel. As some have said above in their posts "You just know" when the right time is. Of course we can't feel what he is feeling but I believe after 15 years we know our pets well enough to know in part as how they are feeling. I don't know how to decribe the feeling of when it is time to put them to sleep but you just know without question. If there is anything I can help you with please let me know. I know it is so tough.
oh my gosh .... these stories are so sad ......... sudo, I am weeping as I read that.......so sorry for your losses.......i am a pet lover and had to have my cat Ralph put down.......and remember putting a couple childhood pets down after years of them being part of the family.....
sorry have to go blow my nose and fix my face ...... it is nice though to be able to feel my feelings about these things and not shut them down like oh well they were just animals or dogs.......or not be allowed to have feelings about animals (TWI style) some people don't understand......
I know how hard this is. You do get to the point where you "just know," but I also know getting there can be a bit of a struggle. I know you'll do what's best for Scrappy. That's the important thing. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Sudo, I did the same thing with my Chester that you did with Abby. I took the day off work, took him for a ride, took him to Burger King for a plain hamburger and to Dairy Queen for a vanilla cone--his two favorite human treats. I took him for a last walk in the park where he loved to go. And when it was time, I stayed with him and held him in my arms and told him I loved him and that he was the best dog ever. It was hard, but I didn't want him to be alone and scared. Man, I'm with you, Sudo. This is still hard to talk about.
I think Chester himself let me know when it was time. Our pooches put up a brave front, but I could see it in his eyes when his physical problems had gotten to be too much for him.
{{{everyone}}}
I remember each of your stories about having to say goodbye to your beloved companions. But I also remember that even though you were mourning, you knew you'd done right by your faithful friends. That's what it's all about. If they were in the wild, they'd probably go off alone and stop eating and the process would happen naturally. But since they're domesticated and they've become part of our families, we have to love them enough to help them go peacefully when it's time.
{{{suda}}}
Don't be hard on yourself. What really matters is how much you loved Abby and what a happy life you and Sudo and your family gave her.
Here's one passed on to me from one of my fellow dog-lovers:
Unlike most days at the Rainbow Bridge, this day dawned cold and gray. All the recent arrivals at the Bridge did not know what to think, as they had never seen such a day. But the animals who had been waiting longer for their beloved people to accompany them across the Bridge knew what was happening, and they began to gather at the pathway leading to the Bridge.
Soon an elderly dog came into view, head hung low and tail dragging. He approached slowly, and though he showed no sign of injury or illness, he was in great emotional pain. Unlike the animals gathered along the pathway, he had not been restored to youth and vigor upon arriving at the Bridge. He felt out of place, and wanted only to cross over and find happiness.
But as he approached the Bridge, his way was barred by an angel, who apologized and explained that the tired and broken-spirited old dog could not cross over. Only those animals accompanied by their people were allowed to cross the Bridge. Having nobody, and with nowhere else to turn, the dog trudged into the field in front of the Bridge.
There he found others like himself, elderly or infirm, sad and discouraged. Unlike the other animals waiting to cross the Bridge, these animals were not running or playing. They simply were lying in the grass, staring forlornly at the pathway across the Rainbow Bridge. The old dog took his place among them, watching the pathway and waiting, yet not knowing what he was actually waiting for. One of the newer dogs at the Bridge asked a cat who had been there longer to explain what was happening. The cat replied, "Those poor animals were abandoned, turned away, or left at rescue places, but never found a home on earth. They all passed on with only the love of a rescuer to comfort them. Because they had no people to love them, they have nobody to escort them across the Rainbow Bridge."
The dog asked the cat, "So what will happen to those animals?" Before the cat could answer, the clouds began to part and the cold turned to bright sunshine. The cat replied, "Watch, and you will see."
In the distance was a single person, and as she approached the Bridge the old, infirm and sad animals in the field were bathed in a golden light. They were all at once made young and healthy, and stood to see what their fate would be. The animals who had previously gathered at the pathway bowed their heads as the person approached.
At each bowed head, the person offered a scratch or hug. One by one, the now youthful and healthy animals from the field fell into line behind the person. Together, they walked across the Rainbow Bridge to a future of happiness and unquestioned love. The dog asked the cat, "What just happened?"
The cat responded, "That was a rescuer."
The animals gathered along the pathway bowing in respect were those who had found their forever homes because of rescuers. They will cross over when their people arrive at the Bridge. The arrival here of a rescuer is a great and solemn event, and as a tribute they are permitted to perform one final act of rescue. They are allowed to escort all those poor animals they couldn't place on earth across the Rainbow Bridge and into Heaven."
The dog thought for a moment, then said, "I like rescuers." The cat smiled and replied, "So does heaven, my friend. So does heaven.
That's a sweet story, Tonto. Thanks for sharing it.
outofdafog, I hear ya. Thank God I don't have to go to work right after reading this thread. I do have to go gas up the car, but passersby will just think it's the gas prices that made me cry.
outofdafog, I hear ya. Thank God I don't have to go to work right after reading this thread. I do have to go gas up the car, but passersby will just think it's the gas prices that made me cry.
Linda LOL that is really a good line - thanks for perking me back up
There are few decisions harder than this one to make.
A year ago next month, a friend of mine who is an animal control officer here in Wilmington called me and asked me if I could foster a yorkie that had been found locked up in an empty house. I agreed and she dropped by my office to give me the yorkie. Well, that was a horrifying moment for me. The little guy was almost dead. He weighed less than a pound, was nothing but boned...REALLY, he was a skeleton. He had no teeth, so his tongue hung out of his mouth. He had no energy and could barely move. It turns out, the house had been abandoned and a number of dogs had been found inside, some dead.
I bottle fed him every 2 hours for a week or so, then one moment I realized he was dying:( As I sat holding him, trying to get him to eat, I looked in his little eyes and "he told me" he was not ready to die. He wanted to live----his eyes were almost pleading with me to save him.
I called JustLoafing and was describing the situation to him........and as we were talking I realized that I just could not sit there and let him die in my arms. I raced him to the vet and the next week or so was very touch and go. This little guy, who has sinced been named Munchkin (munchie for short ) has made wonderful progress. He now weighs 4-5 pounds, and routinely chases my pug off of the bed at night if the pug tries to get closer to me than Munchie is.
Little Munchie is around 14-15 years old according to a couple of vets that have checked him out. He is spunky and it is obvious he loves life now.
My point dear Abi, I agree with many of the posters above that "you will just know" when it is time to have him "PtsP, I also believe that your old boy will tell you what you need to know. Listen to your heart and Listen to HIS HEART.
I too have a dog that is around 15 years old....part shephard and part lab. He has had some physical problems in the last year. This is a site I went to and got some really good answers and advice on his condition. Hope it helps:
This is one of the top requested reprints from Dear Abby:
Thank You......
I remember bringing you home. You were so small and cuddly with your tiny paws and soft fur. You bounced around the room with eyes flashing and ears flopping. Once in a while, you'd let out a yelp just to let me know this was your territory.
Making a mess of the house and chewing on everything in sight became a passion, and when I scolded you, you just put your head down and looked up at me with those innocent eyes as if to say: "I'm Sorry. But I'll do it again as soon as you're not watching"
As you got older, you protected me by looking out the window and barking at everybody walking by. When I had a tough day at work, you would be waiting for me with tail wagging just to say "Welcome home I missed you" You never had a bad day ,and I could always count on you to be there for me.
When I sat down to read the paper or watch TV, you would hop on my lap looking for attention. You never asked for anything more than a pat on the head so you could go to sleep with your head over my leg. As you got older, you moved around more slowly. Then one day, old age finally took it's toll, and you couldn't stand on those wobbly legs anymore. I knelt down and patted you lying there, trying to make you young again. You just looked up at me as if to say you were old and tired and that after all these years of not asking for anything, you had to ask me to do one last favor.
With tears in my eyes, I drove you one last time to the vet. One last time you were lying next to me.
For some strange reason you were able to stand up in the animal hospital- perhaps it was your sense of pride.
As the vet led you away, you stopped for an instant, turned your head and looked at me as if to say:
"Thank you for taking care of me."
I thought, - "No thank YOU for taking care of ME"........
I had to put my Border Terrier down in December. He was 16 years old and a big part of my life. Without going into a lot of sad details, I made the decision based on the fact that he was clearly in a lot of pain and he no longer get pleasure out of the things he had always loved; walking, playing and eating.
I got some closure by giving way his stuff to people that could use it. His prescription meds went to a free vet clinic. His bed, extra bowl and grooming stuff to a neighbor with a similar sized dog and our Border Terrier book to Belle and Vixon. I sent the book before I had to put him down, but the handwriting was on the wall.
Not much else I can say, except that the hurt does start to go away in a month or two.
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excathedra
i'm so sorry abi
my family's philosophy is when they are hurting too much and of course when we couldn't afford to do anything (which was always)
if our dear family pet was hurting, it just didn't seem fair or right to let them go on in misery
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Belle
(((((Abigail)))))
I've never had to have a pet put to sleep, but from much exposure to the world of AKC breeders through all my stuff with Vixen, I've heard it likened to the "How do you know when you're in love?" question. The answer is "you just know"..... I know that doesn't help, but maybe it does. :(
You love your pet and he's a part of the family, so there's a bit of denial that's normal and expected. I have always thought in my own situation, that Vixen is very independent and if she couldn't take care of herself when I'm not around during the day, that she would be miserable and I would worry that something might happen while I'm not there to help or protect her. That's when I think I would have her put to sleep. She would be able to die with dignity and still being the wonderful pet that I've come to love so much.....not totally wiped out, incapacitated and miserable.
IMO, my neighbors who are like grandparents to me, waited too long to put Bettler, their schnauzer, to sleep. He would fall down and not be able to get back up. When they went out of town, I was over there every hour because I was scared to death that he might fall and hurt himself while I was gone.
I dunno, maybe you do "just know". Regardless, I'm praying for you, Sushi, your wonderful boys and that four-legged member of your family and how difficult this time must be for all of you.
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excathedra
oh i know folks who carried their doggies up and down the stairs because doggie wasn't in pain, he just couldn't do the steps anymore
one of my darling beloved dogs is going to get to this place soon. i'm dreading it so much
my sister just had to put her dog to sleep
she held out to the end
so did my other sister
if they're not in pain, hang in there with them, i say
gotta go, feeling sad
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T-Bone
Whoa Abigail, my heart goes out to your family - that includes your dog...These wonderful creatures become part of our family - like one of our kids. I think THEY think they're one of our kids. A Great Dane/Aussie Mix sounds like a big dog - and to be 15 years old. I often hear big dogs don't live as long...We had a Lab/Springer Spaniel. Sweetest dog in the world - when getting shots at the Vet's office she'd lick him....SHe got to be 14 years old, had tumors, problems controlling bowels, etc. It was hard to do - but my son [she was a Christmas present to him] finally decided the most loving thing to do was have her put to sleep...
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topoftheworld
I'm so sorry, Abigal. I know how painful this is.
An animal has no sense of death. They will stay alive simply because you want them to. The hardest thing for us humans is knowing the pain that will be caused within us by their loss. But sometimes we have to make that choice for them, since they can't. And you will know in your gut when that time comes.
Praying.
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coolchef1248 @adelphia.net
abbie
i am so sad for you and i am not even a dog person
but damn that has to be hard
you will know when it is time
i just wish we coud do that to humans to
my mom is dying of cancer and she wants to go but she has to wait
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Abigail
"When they went out of town, I was over there every hour because I was scared to death that he might fall and hurt himself while I was gone."
Belle, that is one of our concerns. We usually travel to the U.P. in the summer without our dogs. I have a neighbor who takes care of them when we are gone, but Scrappy always is miserable when we go on our summer trip. I am worried about how he will do without us this summer and how we and our neighbor would feel if something happened while we were away.
"oh i know folks who carried their doggies up and down the stairs because doggie wasn't in pain, he just couldn't do the steps anymore"
That's one of the things we are struggling with too ExC. There was a time when he used to groan when getting up - we knew it was his hips. But he seemed fine other than that one groan while getting up from laying down. He doesn't grown anymore, which is part of what makes us think he's not really in pain - that he's basically just not feeling much of anything at all on his back end. But we aren't totally sure either.
" A Great Dane/Aussie Mix sounds like a big dog - and to be 15 years old. I often hear big dogs don't live as long...We had a Lab/Springer Spaniel. Sweetest dog in the world - when getting shots at the Vet's office she'd lick him....SHe got to be 14 years old, had tumors, problems controlling bowels, "
Yeah - he's big - was nearly 80 pounds once - now is only about 65 give or take a couple. He has tumors too, but not cancerous ones - just fatty tissue. The vet said if he does have a degenerative nerve disorder he will start having problems controlling his bowels at some point too.
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Sudo
Abigail,
These thread about our pets always pull at my heart strings. Carol and I had two Cocker Spanials that we lost if that's the right word. Carol had gotten Abby shortly before we started dating. She was full of vim and vigor as a puppy. We got married and Abbie was jealous of me, I think. She slept at the foot of our bed and seemed to resent me at first but we bred her with a championship Cocker and kept the "pick of the litter"... and we named her Lady.. after the "Lady" in Lady And The Tramp.
So we had Abby and Lady even before we had our children.. and our children grew up not knowing life without there being an Abby and Lady to love on and pet. But they both grew old and finally one day I had to take Abby in to have her put to sleep. She was no longer able to walk because of paralysis in her hind quarters which meant she couldn't get up to go to the bathroom. I didn't mind cleaning her up every day but I could tell... and I know this might seem ridiculous to some... that it bothered HER that I had to do it for her. She was old and paralyzed. I had to take her to the vet for the very last time.
I carried her out to the car in my arms since she really couldn't walk and placed her on the front seat where she loved to ride. She LOVED going for a ride in the car. So I drove around a bit.. taking the long way to the vet all the while rubbing her head and telling her how much I loved her. You all can't imagine how tough that was for me knowing it was a one way trip for Abby. That I would never again have the pleasure of doting on my adorable little dog. Did she somehow know that this was her last ride in her life? In the past she knew that we took her to the vet when she was sick and then when she went home she was better. Did she think we were taking her to the vet for her to get better? My heart was breaking but I wasn't going to show it to Abby. No, I was petting her and talking to her like it was old times and she was just going to get shots and some medicine. I was going to make sure that her last hours on Earth were happy ones.
Gawd, I can't get through this, Abigail. Its too painful still. Let me just say that you are right to be concerned about the quality of life issues. We have to be able to do this as the last caring act for our loved pets.
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Nottawayfer
(((((Abi and Sushi)))))
The decision to put a pet to sleep is one of the hardest. Almost one year ago we had to pur our Hershey down. He had a cancerous tumor in the roof of his mouth. It knocked out one of his back teeth, and he had blood coming out of his nose because the tumor was way out of control before we noticed it.
Our vet told us that if he started to lose weight or if the bleeding in his nose became regular that it was time for us to depart with our beloved. We fed him whatever his heart desired. We loved him big all the time, but we loved him EXTRA BIG after we found out he may not be around much longer. At the point the vet gave us the advice, we had no idea how long it would be. It was about a month.
I would try getting a second opinion from another vet and ask the vet what would be a deciding factor to be the most humane from your dog. The hardest part of making the decision was because we didn't want to let him go.
Praying here....
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WhiteDove
Abi
It is the most painful thing to let go of our furry friends but Belle is right You just know.....A poem from a dogs view maybe.
The Last Battle
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
and pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this--the last battle--can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
Don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
What is to come can hold no fears
You'd not want me to suffer, so.
When the time comes, please let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me til the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
it is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We've been so close--we two--these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.......
And a owner.........
I Love You This Much
Written by Penny Cary
Suggested by Colleen Gentilcore, Suntera Shelties
When you were just a pup, and you were new to home and heart, I used to laugh so hard and pick you up and hold you squirming and struggling in my arms and whisper to you "I love you this much."
I laughed as you tried to rid yourself of those pesky tapes and watched as you struggled through the puppy stuff, and mostly I didn't mind for I knew that puddles turned to piddles, and piddles would soon pass.
I even managed to grin when you decided that our house should be free of all wood products, and we fought constantly to decide who was right about the crate. I guess you were because I cannot imagine not having you at the foot of my bed at night. I don't know how I would have made it from room to room without your guidance or stood erect without your silken head to rest my hands on, but then, I never had to.
And I smiled a lot as you grew and decided that squirrels were indeed evil, and that there was no really good reason for cats; that every dog in the neighborhood posed a potential threat and needed to be sent packing.
And I was delighted when you discovered children, and you found they were much like you - they liked to run; they liked to play; and there was an endless quality to the day when they were around.
You and I as adults together developed a deep and abiding respect for one another. Your constant devotion made life's valleys a little less deep, and there were times when I needed you: to listen, to love and to lick away the tears... and you were always there.
You liked Chinese food, spaghetti and cheese. Lettuce and pickles and heartworm pills were for other dogs. We adventured, you and I. We camped, we fished, we hiked, and we played ball. Oh, did we play ball.
And through all those years, you gave so much, and I could only hold you in my arms at the end of each day, and we'd both smile, and I would whisper "I love you this much."
And now we've come to this. I don't believe I have the strength to say goodbye, but you tell me it's time. Neither one of us has smiled in a very long time, and the only part of you that doesn't indicate pain is your stubby little tail. I cried when the doctor told me, and I railed against the Powers That Be, and all the platitudes in the world and all the comforting friends can't make up for the undeniable fact that you will no longer be with me. And I don't think I can do this. I envy those with ones who passed so quickly. The shock must numb the grief.
But now, as I have done so many, many times before through so many, many years, I fold you in my arms, lay my head upon your velvet cheek, and whisper one last time, "I love you this much."
For all who have had to make the decision......
Edited by WhiteDoveLink to comment
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Suda
Abigail,
My heart goes out to you. It's such a hard time and decision. I agree with everyone above, you will know when the time is right. Look at it through your dear pets eyes, not yours. Let them go when they are ready, not when you are ready to say goodbye, because you may wait too long.
We kept our dear Abby too long. We were keeping her in the bathroom off the kitchen because she could no longer walk, and thus laid around all day. Every day when we returned home, she would be in her excrement, and we had to bathe her. The last Friday, as I picked her up to bathe her, her hip bone protruded through her skin, and my heart broke as I realized I had waited too long. She had no feeling in her hind quarters, so I do not think she was in pain. Her tail was still wagging, and joy was still in her face because I was home and loving and caring for her.
That night we had a farewell party for her. Each family member visited with her one by one, loved on her, and told her good-bye.
The next morning, my dear husband took her to the vet. I was so thankful he did that, as I don't think I could have gone. When the children and I awoke, Abby had been put to sleep. Sudo had her in a box "casket" and we took her out the the family pet burial grounds at his parents house, and had a funeral for her. It was a dreary, rainy day, as if the world was mourning her loss with us. I will always remember that day, and how sorry I was that I had held on to her too long. I wish my last memories of her were of a whole body, not a broken one.
I will keep you, and all your family, including your beloved pet, in my prayers.
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justloafing
Abigail, Ohh it is such a tough decision to make and I having to send some of my puppers to the Rainbow Bridge. I know how you feel. As some have said above in their posts "You just know" when the right time is. Of course we can't feel what he is feeling but I believe after 15 years we know our pets well enough to know in part as how they are feeling. I don't know how to decribe the feeling of when it is time to put them to sleep but you just know without question. If there is anything I can help you with please let me know. I know it is so tough.
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outofdafog
oh my gosh .... these stories are so sad ......... sudo, I am weeping as I read that.......so sorry for your losses.......i am a pet lover and had to have my cat Ralph put down.......and remember putting a couple childhood pets down after years of them being part of the family.....
sorry have to go blow my nose and fix my face ...... it is nice though to be able to feel my feelings about these things and not shut them down like oh well they were just animals or dogs.......or not be allowed to have feelings about animals (TWI style) some people don't understand......
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Linda Z
{{{Abi, sushi and family}}}
I know how hard this is. You do get to the point where you "just know," but I also know getting there can be a bit of a struggle. I know you'll do what's best for Scrappy. That's the important thing. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Sudo, I did the same thing with my Chester that you did with Abby. I took the day off work, took him for a ride, took him to Burger King for a plain hamburger and to Dairy Queen for a vanilla cone--his two favorite human treats. I took him for a last walk in the park where he loved to go. And when it was time, I stayed with him and held him in my arms and told him I loved him and that he was the best dog ever. It was hard, but I didn't want him to be alone and scared. Man, I'm with you, Sudo. This is still hard to talk about.
I think Chester himself let me know when it was time. Our pooches put up a brave front, but I could see it in his eyes when his physical problems had gotten to be too much for him.
{{{everyone}}}
I remember each of your stories about having to say goodbye to your beloved companions. But I also remember that even though you were mourning, you knew you'd done right by your faithful friends. That's what it's all about. If they were in the wild, they'd probably go off alone and stop eating and the process would happen naturally. But since they're domesticated and they've become part of our families, we have to love them enough to help them go peacefully when it's time.
{{{suda}}}
Don't be hard on yourself. What really matters is how much you loved Abby and what a happy life you and Sudo and your family gave her.
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tonto
Here's one passed on to me from one of my fellow dog-lovers:
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Linda Z
That's a sweet story, Tonto. Thanks for sharing it.
outofdafog, I hear ya. Thank God I don't have to go to work right after reading this thread. I do have to go gas up the car, but passersby will just think it's the gas prices that made me cry.
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outofdafog
Linda LOL that is really a good line - thanks for perking me back up
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Abigail
I appreciate all the responses everyone - thank you.
Boy this has been a though thread to read!
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SafariVista
((((((Abigail, Sushi, boys & Scrappy)))))
We'll be praying for you during this rough time...
Just crying reading through here...
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Radar OReilly
Abi,
There are few decisions harder than this one to make.
A year ago next month, a friend of mine who is an animal control officer here in Wilmington called me and asked me if I could foster a yorkie that had been found locked up in an empty house. I agreed and she dropped by my office to give me the yorkie. Well, that was a horrifying moment for me. The little guy was almost dead. He weighed less than a pound, was nothing but boned...REALLY, he was a skeleton. He had no teeth, so his tongue hung out of his mouth. He had no energy and could barely move. It turns out, the house had been abandoned and a number of dogs had been found inside, some dead.
I bottle fed him every 2 hours for a week or so, then one moment I realized he was dying:( As I sat holding him, trying to get him to eat, I looked in his little eyes and "he told me" he was not ready to die. He wanted to live----his eyes were almost pleading with me to save him.
I called JustLoafing and was describing the situation to him........and as we were talking I realized that I just could not sit there and let him die in my arms. I raced him to the vet and the next week or so was very touch and go. This little guy, who has sinced been named Munchkin (munchie for short
) has made wonderful progress. He now weighs 4-5 pounds, and routinely chases my pug off of the bed at night if the pug tries to get closer to me than Munchie is.
Little Munchie is around 14-15 years old according to a couple of vets that have checked him out. He is spunky and it is obvious he loves life now.
My point dear Abi, I agree with many of the posters above that "you will just know" when it is time to have him "PtsP, I also believe that your old boy will tell you what you need to know. Listen to your heart and Listen to HIS HEART.
XXOO,
Radar
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sogwap51
I too have a dog that is around 15 years old....part shephard and part lab. He has had some physical problems in the last year. This is a site I went to and got some really good answers and advice on his condition. Hope it helps:
http://forums.pethobbyist.com/index.php
If it doesn't work as a "link" in here, copy and paste it into your browser.
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WhiteDove
This is one of the top requested reprints from Dear Abby:
Thank You......
I remember bringing you home. You were so small and cuddly with your tiny paws and soft fur. You bounced around the room with eyes flashing and ears flopping. Once in a while, you'd let out a yelp just to let me know this was your territory.
Making a mess of the house and chewing on everything in sight became a passion, and when I scolded you, you just put your head down and looked up at me with those innocent eyes as if to say: "I'm Sorry. But I'll do it again as soon as you're not watching"
As you got older, you protected me by looking out the window and barking at everybody walking by. When I had a tough day at work, you would be waiting for me with tail wagging just to say "Welcome home I missed you" You never had a bad day ,and I could always count on you to be there for me.
When I sat down to read the paper or watch TV, you would hop on my lap looking for attention. You never asked for anything more than a pat on the head so you could go to sleep with your head over my leg. As you got older, you moved around more slowly. Then one day, old age finally took it's toll, and you couldn't stand on those wobbly legs anymore. I knelt down and patted you lying there, trying to make you young again. You just looked up at me as if to say you were old and tired and that after all these years of not asking for anything, you had to ask me to do one last favor.
With tears in my eyes, I drove you one last time to the vet. One last time you were lying next to me.
For some strange reason you were able to stand up in the animal hospital- perhaps it was your sense of pride.
As the vet led you away, you stopped for an instant, turned your head and looked at me as if to say:
"Thank you for taking care of me."
I thought, - "No thank YOU for taking care of ME"........
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oldiesman
googled average age for a great dane -- 8 years.
sounds like this blessed dog is ready for doggie heaven.
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Jim
I had to put my Border Terrier down in December. He was 16 years old and a big part of my life. Without going into a lot of sad details, I made the decision based on the fact that he was clearly in a lot of pain and he no longer get pleasure out of the things he had always loved; walking, playing and eating.
I got some closure by giving way his stuff to people that could use it. His prescription meds went to a free vet clinic. His bed, extra bowl and grooming stuff to a neighbor with a similar sized dog and our Border Terrier book to Belle and Vixon. I sent the book before I had to put him down, but the handwriting was on the wall.
Not much else I can say, except that the hurt does start to go away in a month or two.
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