Congratulations on the anniversary of your ministry! A ministry that was built on dishonesty...one who`s riches and property were amassed from extortion of your bretheren...bretheren tossed aside and defamed when their usefullness was exhausted...or they became a threat to the secret evil...a ministry that is contaminated by the pain and suffering of so many who were treated vilely...a ministry that is stained by the blood of those betrayed...
By all means ...continue to enjoy the riches bought by the toil...the blood...the sweat ...the very lives of those whom you have used and forgotten.....
Yes, even as I type this, the dimishing flock of TWI faithful are in their Sunday Best, sitting in rented meeting rooms in Hotels across America, listening to the telephone...
Amazing.
A week from now, they'll receive a Sunday Service tape in the mail, all the better to hear the same crap all over again...Yup, life in "The Household" is gooood...
Hotel? A normal sized living room should suffice nicely these days. But it would still be a 10 hour project to hear a 2 hour phone hookup.
How nostalgic I'm feeling - I should have spent the first half of today doing setup for a meeting for 20 other people who didn't really want to be there either... with a crew of 16 or 17. Right about now we should be sitting in our uncomfortable folding chairs waiting for the phone hookup and thinking "in only five hours I can be home if no one calls a meeting after cleanup to blather about how important this day was. I wonder if the fish are biting? I wonder if I remember how to fish?"
How spiritually dead we must be. What could we possibly be thinking to give this up?
Suggested ways to celebrate the Analverary of the Way Irrational:
1. Put on a suit or dress (gender-appropriate!) and go to a large public place and stand around with a nametag. Shake everyone's hands.
2. Buy a folding chair, set the AC for 59 and listen to music on an old tape recorder. After 2 hours, I'll adjust the thermostat to 86 (or whatever is maximum) and run the shower to make it nice and sticky. Then I'll watch any movie I have seen enough to know the script by heart. Occassionally, I'll stand up and applaud for no reason.
... they'll lock me up for sure.
3. Find a complete stranger and ask to clean his/her house. If it seems they make less than me, find a wealthier person. Anyone already employing a maid or butler would be perfect. The next best would be anyone who has a house that is already clean.
4. Determine who the worst kid is in the local elementary school is and offer to babysit for free. Ask that I only do it on holidays or my birthday.
5. Offer my house to neighbor's for their party so their house doesn't get dirty. Ask them to invite only their messiest friends and not to clean before leaving. I'll do that. See if they'll let me give them over 10% of my paycheck to do it.
Folding chairs? I don't think they use folding chairs anymore. They marked and avoided them, apparently they were leaving too many creases and wrinkles in the laundry..
Oh yuck, another anniversary. Those stupid anniversaries never meant a thing to me anyway. What did it have to actually do with our lives anyway? Like I cared.
OOOOOh, the Wierwilles, oooooh, what happened years ago.....like how does that relate to God's Word, which was supposed to be the real focal point of it all, not stupid TWI and how long it had been around.
So have your stupid anniversary, TWI. Like it means anything. These days it means even less.
Who's left in that pathetic organization can sit around with glazed eyes and listen to some prattle about the great history of TWI.
My congratulations to Rosie, the BOT, the WGB, and those left in the jail of TWI.
Just think what a great and loving Heavenly Father we hAve in GOD and the wonderous redemption made possible by the atonement of Jesus Christ.
And here is another year--a new day-the first day of the rest of your lives
time to make those apologies, make restitution for the wrongs you have done, confess and ask God and your fellowman for forgiveness, Repent and turn your lives around.
I don't normally preach but I couldn't let this opportunity go by without at least holding out the hand of brotherly reconcillation to you
So mull it over and you may find the other side of the wall of the jail is a much brighter place than you thought possible
1. make a formal, public and written appolegy to the people they have hurt over the years.
2. take all the money that they have, known and unknown bank accounts that have been taken from people that have been associated with TWI, and give it back.
3. Close down the Headquarters and all of the sattilite areas that they own and sell them to help pay back the current and past members.
BUT! all of this is wishfull thinking and every year the #$!@%$#@ a++ H++es keep saying how they have helped people find the true word of GOD.
BULL+++t, the only people who they have ever helped are themselfs.
OMG Uncle Hairy...I`m going to do THAT one in calligraphy and hang it on the wall!!
Wow where were YOU when we were trying to come up with logos for the billboard that was rented a couple of years back right outside of hq....now THAT would have had impact....rofl
You oughtta let us put it in card form to send to all of the wafers kindda like the bot used to send to us...lmao
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dabobbada
Now would that be according to;
Snow pump dating,
Vesper Chimes dating,
or
Actual Incorporation dating?
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rascal
I`ll add my greetings as well, if I may Bob...
Congratulations on the anniversary of your ministry! A ministry that was built on dishonesty...one who`s riches and property were amassed from extortion of your bretheren...bretheren tossed aside and defamed when their usefullness was exhausted...or they became a threat to the secret evil...a ministry that is contaminated by the pain and suffering of so many who were treated vilely...a ministry that is stained by the blood of those betrayed...
By all means ...continue to enjoy the riches bought by the toil...the blood...the sweat ...the very lives of those whom you have used and forgotten.....
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JeffMedic
yep, it's come to this:
"be it unto you, twi, according to the words of The Lord"
As you you have done, let it be returned to you, pressed down, shaken together and running over.
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krys
Happy Anniversary Mr. Linder.
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JustThinking
Happy Anniversary to The Way Irrational!
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Cherished Child
Yes, even as I type this, the dimishing flock of TWI faithful are in their Sunday Best, sitting in rented meeting rooms in Hotels across America, listening to the telephone...
Amazing.
A week from now, they'll receive a Sunday Service tape in the mail, all the better to hear the same crap all over again...Yup, life in "The Household" is gooood...
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Jason P
Hotel? A normal sized living room should suffice nicely these days. But it would still be a 10 hour project to hear a 2 hour phone hookup.
How nostalgic I'm feeling - I should have spent the first half of today doing setup for a meeting for 20 other people who didn't really want to be there either... with a crew of 16 or 17. Right about now we should be sitting in our uncomfortable folding chairs waiting for the phone hookup and thinking "in only five hours I can be home if no one calls a meeting after cleanup to blather about how important this day was. I wonder if the fish are biting? I wonder if I remember how to fish?"
How spiritually dead we must be. What could we possibly be thinking to give this up?
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dmiller
Who's got some drambui?
--> Let's drink a toast!
Oh -- wait a minute -- they are toast.
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TheInvisibleDan
Ah, how to celebrate the occassion?
How about...curling up in a fetal position inside a large, enclosed cardboard box?
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JustThinking
Suggested ways to celebrate the Analverary of the Way Irrational:
1. Put on a suit or dress (gender-appropriate!) and go to a large public place and stand around with a nametag. Shake everyone's hands.
2. Buy a folding chair, set the AC for 59 and listen to music on an old tape recorder. After 2 hours, I'll adjust the thermostat to 86 (or whatever is maximum) and run the shower to make it nice and sticky. Then I'll watch any movie I have seen enough to know the script by heart. Occassionally, I'll stand up and applaud for no reason.
... they'll lock me up for sure.
3. Find a complete stranger and ask to clean his/her house. If it seems they make less than me, find a wealthier person. Anyone already employing a maid or butler would be perfect. The next best would be anyone who has a house that is already clean.
4. Determine who the worst kid is in the local elementary school is and offer to babysit for free. Ask that I only do it on holidays or my birthday.
5. Offer my house to neighbor's for their party so their house doesn't get dirty. Ask them to invite only their messiest friends and not to clean before leaving. I'll do that. See if they'll let me give them over 10% of my paycheck to do it.
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Ham
Folding chairs? I don't think they use folding chairs anymore. They marked and avoided them, apparently they were leaving too many creases and wrinkles in the laundry..
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outandabout
Oh yuck, another anniversary. Those stupid anniversaries never meant a thing to me anyway. What did it have to actually do with our lives anyway? Like I cared.
OOOOOh, the Wierwilles, oooooh, what happened years ago.....like how does that relate to God's Word, which was supposed to be the real focal point of it all, not stupid TWI and how long it had been around.
So have your stupid anniversary, TWI. Like it means anything. These days it means even less.
Who's left in that pathetic organization can sit around with glazed eyes and listen to some prattle about the great history of TWI.
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Trefor Heywood
An anniversary celebration?
More like time for the Wake!
:D-->
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JustThinking
Mr. H,
You may be right. It's the corpse job to be a pain in your a**. ;-)
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templelady
My congratulations to Rosie, the BOT, the WGB, and those left in the jail of TWI.
Just think what a great and loving Heavenly Father we hAve in GOD and the wonderous redemption made possible by the atonement of Jesus Christ.
And here is another year--a new day-the first day of the rest of your lives
time to make those apologies, make restitution for the wrongs you have done, confess and ask God and your fellowman for forgiveness, Repent and turn your lives around.
I don't normally preach but I couldn't let this opportunity go by without at least holding out the hand of brotherly reconcillation to you
So mull it over and you may find the other side of the wall of the jail is a much brighter place than you thought possible
Here's hoping ya'll' take the offer
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danteh1
To me, the best Anniversary TWI could have is to:
1. make a formal, public and written appolegy to the people they have hurt over the years.
2. take all the money that they have, known and unknown bank accounts that have been taken from people that have been associated with TWI, and give it back.
3. Close down the Headquarters and all of the sattilite areas that they own and sell them to help pay back the current and past members.
BUT! all of this is wishfull thinking and every year the #$!@%$#@ a++ H++es keep saying how they have helped people find the true word of GOD.
BULL+++t, the only people who they have ever helped are themselfs.
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GrouchoMarxJr
A Special poem on the anniversary:
THE WAY
All these years you took a stand, to teach us God's true word.
We trusted you to hold it high, until all the people heard.
But then the rumors, then the facts, we couldn't let it pass.
To think our trusted shepard screwed his own sheep in the a$$.
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rascal
OMG Uncle Hairy...I`m going to do THAT one in calligraphy and hang it on the wall!!
Wow where were YOU when we were trying to come up with logos for the billboard that was rented a couple of years back right outside of hq....now THAT would have had impact....rofl
You oughtta let us put it in card form to send to all of the wafers kindda like the bot used to send to us...lmao
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Bob
The poem's a keeper!
Can I get it on a T-shirt?
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Ham
Here's a limerick if they decide to turn it into an Irish wake..
An Oakie was once in New Knoxville,
who claimed that all others were awful.
He wished he could stay at the beautiful place,
but he just had to make it a brothel.
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Ham
Please, do not accuse me of besmirching the Irish. No comparison to the Irish was intended.
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Ham
Hey, if we keep this up, maybe Paw can publish "Greasespot Cafe Album of Verse".
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Trefor Heywood
A randy old Wierwille named Vee Pee
Could do certain things that were creepy
Though his heart was on fire
For the Word, he would squire
Loads of women in camper or teepee.
An insane young upstart called Loy
Became Pres and then used as his toy
Everyone at all levels
As spiritual devils
And killed all the love and the joy.
A simpering yes girl named Rosie
Although she was useless and dozy
Still managed with Donna
To take over and con a
Group of people so she could live cosy.
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Belle
Y'all are cracking me up!! I didn't know we had so much talent here in the GSpot.
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