M&A and breaking up marriages: Deliberate infliction of emotional distress?

[pjroberge]

I cannot see any purpose for the defamation of people that were forced to leave by M&A or chose to leave other than to deliberatly inflict emotional distress. The same for the practice of trying to break up marriages if one half wanted to leave TWI.

I can see no other reason or necessity for these actions except to try to damage people's emotional well being deliberatly as a sort of sick revenge.

Can anyone think of any legitemate reason for the way people were treated?

Any other thoughts about this?

[insurgent]

Well, you see, Pat, it's like this....The Bible says not to be unequally yoked and to have someone who is way craps and someone who is not in a marriage creates an imbalance of power and spiritualism so that has to be fixed. (I know darn well that the verse says not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers, but the twi(ts) are very adept at privately interpreting verses where they need to make a point). Fixing a problem like this generally means forcing the couple to pay more money for going back through the craps program to become equal or divorce. It's a godly decision and one that has to be made because, well, you just can't have imbalance in a relationship.

The same is true for couples where one wants out and the other doesn't. The one who stays with the twi(ts) are the more spiritual of the couple and since the other person wants to leave it means that they are going on the internet and subjecting themselves to devil spirit influence. It's possible to help the more spiritual partner to recognize the devil spirit influence and possible possession so that they will know when it's time to leave the partner. Weakness brings down strength and evil communications corrupt good morals. That poor spiritual wayfer will be vexed in the spirit like Lot if he/she doesn't leave the partner who has turned his/her back on God by leaving the only true household and functioning body of Christ.

As for the defaming...People have to know what we're dealing with. If someone is possessed and leaves twi or "eliminates themselves from the competition" then everyone needs to know about the evil practices of these people so that they can recognize them in others and thereby help keep the household clean. It's also healing for them to learn about the wrong-doings of these people so that they can learn that they are so much more spiritual and deserving of God's protection than these terrible evil-doers.

It's all about keeping the household informed. Wayfers are told everything from soup to nuts, you know? This is just making sure they know what they need to know to keep themselves clean and in a position to be blessed.

[templelady]

MY HEAD HURTS--the result that always happens when forced to read what passes for logic amoung the Twi(t)s (LIke that name BTW ;)-->)

Twi Leadership just couldn't stand rejection in any form--they never reached the level of emotional maturity to realize that rejection was not a personal vendetta against them, so lashed out like an angry child yelling "I Hate You".

They then conducted a whisper campaign comparable to a bunch of Junior High Girls who are the self-declared Queens of the Campus removing any girl they perceived as a threat to their status.

It was the defense of insecure people who felt that only by being a dictator and micro-manager were they able to hold followers--lacking any self confidence in their own abilities or the abilities of others.

I don't think that they really ever considered how their actions were perceived by others nor the long term results --being narcissists they only were interested how actions affected them.

[imbus]

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER,PARANOIA,NARRSISISM,GRADIOUSITY,SOCIALPATHIC,DETACHMENT DISORDER,OPPOSITIONAL/DEFIANT DISORDER,OBSESSIVE/COMPULSIVE DISORDER,SEXUAL ADDICTION,ADHD,SPIRITUAL LEARNING DEFFICITE DISORDER,CONDUCT DISORDER,ect. Characteristic of a seared consciencs at TWI.

All this equals PTSD(Post tramatic stress disorder)and GAD(General anxeity disorder) for the MA folks. This you can recover from. The said diognosis mentoned above of TWI is very difficult if not impossibe to over come.

[Bramble]

Insurgent--that is exactly the way I remember it.

If some beloved saints walk away from the true household of God, then it is up to the leadership to communicate to the household about these people's secret faults and failings.

The finger of blame and perversion must always point at those that leave, because the Way is Perfect.

Yup

[JustThinking]

Pat,

Their application of it was more "discard those who we don't think measure up or may be too much work."

[JustThinking]

Pat,

After reading your question again, I'm unclear. Are you asking if it's reasonable to M&A someone just because their spouse leaves? Or about M&A, in general?

JT

[socks]

Well, 'gracious' isn't a word I'd associate with the Way, at least not anymore. It may be that they've learned their lesson the hard way about this mark and avoid issue, but time will tell. If they haven't they need to grab some people by the short hairs and tell them to shut up! while they still have a farm to squat on.

I'm certain that quite a few people who could quantify damage sustained by the Way's mark and avoid actions could sue for damages. One's good name is generally considered to have a value. Not that a law suit is the answer for every problem by any means, but it seems to be the only thing that gets the Way's attention. They're like near sighted pigs that have to be led out of the muck by the nose.

[socks]

The verse in Romans 16, about marking and avoiding those who cause "divisions and offences"....

The definition of offences includes that which is offensive by EXAMPLE and action as in a stumblingblock, something that causes another to err, trip or fall. Something that offends another.

Isn't the ol' greek word "skandalon"...?

Yeah, it's real scandalous if you don't vacuum your home twice a day. Dust mites, that'll really screw someone's faith up.

But bad mouth people, give bad advice, destroy reputations, have to fire your acting President because he can't keep his pants on, have half your staff "leadership" suddenly grow zippers on their lips because nobody knows nuttin' about nothin' and ain't never seen nobody do nuttin' wrong ever...

That's not offensive? Well, according to their little 25k TV add, no. They're the heart of America.

NOT TO MENTION the incredibly bad hair that seems to have proliferated at the Way Nash in the last 10 years or so. Geez. Talk about offensive. I have to avoid Rosalies photo on this site's homepage lest I fall in to a serious out of fellowship funk. (I don't think it's fixable, from what I've seen that kind of hair thing can only be made right by mucho prayer and fasting). THAT needs marking and avoidance if anything ever did. Seriously.

[vickles]

I always understood the reasoning for twi to talk about the person leaving in a bad light was because when someone left twi they could take ten or more believers with them.

Does anyone else remember that?

[CoolWaters]

Insidious is the word that comes to mind:

quote:

---

adj.

1. Working or spreading harmfully in a subtle or stealthy manner: insidious rumors; an insidious disease.

2. Intended to entrap; treacherous: insidious misinformation.

3. Beguiling but harmful; alluring: insidious pleasures.

---

Speaking with somebody earlier today, it was recalled just how well planned the defamation of character that was/is practiced by twi.

TWI had every "expert" available in their ranks...psychologists/psychiatrists, police officers, medical doctors, social workers, political figures, attorneys and others with standing in the courts, financial planners/advisors, etc.

It was nothing to twi to bring together a team of "experts" and defame anyone's character when needed.

Add this to the fact that twi preyed/preys on young people without enough life experience to understand that a restraining order and/or a cease and desist order would have at least had twi leadership a$$e$ in court answering for their practices. I can think of some children who would have not had to suffer as terribly as they did if anybody realized what DISCOVERY would have brought to light.

So aside from inflicting emotional damage or exacting revenge, I say that twi held to/holds to their insidious practices for the purpose of covering a$$ in a courtroom.

[templelady]

By their campaignes of slander and defamation TWI makes it clear to all believers that if they should be so foolhardy as to leave "the household" not only will they be defamed within the Household but those same slurs can be presented to civil authorities as character assassination.

Try explaining to angry adult children who want to know why you just didn't leave that

A--you had no friends outside of TWI

B-- either you were the breadwinner which meant you had to go to your job therefore were easy to find or you didn't work which meant you had no money to leave on

C=-- If by some miracle you did manage to flee TWI would throw it's resurces behind the parent who remained "standing". Bringing in character witness after character witness to show your mental instability, your general unfitness as a parent --thus ensuring the "faithful" party would retain the children. the house and/or houshold furnishings etc.

The power of M & A is not so much what they can do when you leave --and that damage is considerable--but that it keeps those on the fence from even trying to make a break for it especially if there are children involved.

The difference between now and the 80's and early 90's is we have places like GS with ex members who will hold out helpng hands. In the 80's maybe even earlier--fleeing an abusive spouse or just TWI in general was akin to a prison break.

[Oakspear]

My ex-wife and I had marital problems, many people inside and outside TWI do. TWI didn't cause them, but they made them worse, and certainly did nothing to help.

TWI leaders gave contradictory advice to each of us, and a third version of counsel when they spoke to us together.

TWI leaders invaded our home under color of (godly) authority and disruted our routines.

TWI leaders encouraged each of us (especially my ex-wife) to complain about the shortcomings of the other.

TWI leaders constantly fed my ex-wife verses about withdrawing, separating, not being unequally yoked, in the context of a marriage.

TWI leaders would tell us that we were to agree together on how to run our household, then would "direct" my ex-wife to take actions that were in opposition to what we had agreed on.

I'm sure I'll think of more

[Dot Matrix]

Pat

Pt please :)-->

[Dot Matrix]

Oak

I was told this often:

"TWI leaders constantly fed my ex-wife verses about withdrawing, separating, not being unequally yoked, in the context of a marriage."

And we divorced.

[Bolshevik]

I think they "try" to generate (or take opportunity of) conflict so as to harden one's position in twi. Some folks are lost, but the remaining are more committed.

[Ham]

Or maybe its the simpler case of having one spouse in the pocket is better than having two in the bush..

[Bolshevik]

Or maybe its the simpler case of having one spouse in the pocket is better than having two in the bush..

Wouldn't it be simpler to help them and keep them both?

It's like witnessing . . . Is it really to bring more people in?

[waysider]

Wouldn't it be simpler to help them and keep them both?

No.

Then they become committed to each other instead of the ministry.

[frank123lol]

No.

Then they become committed to each other instead of the ministry.

You hit the nail on the head.Ministry comes first,even before god,ministry be not blamed.

Even though the ministry blamed every one,everything on every and anyone.

If there was a stong marriage,(Ispeak of my podunk area of Michigan),the ministry(local swell heads)

were going to mess with it,why?because they could,its is a cult right?Control is constantly keeping you

off balance.ie,making goals that were always changing or were never going to come pass.Saying there was a hidden sin,

we either have a complete saviour or we do not.I believe it was deliberate.

For instance,"Love and respect your wife as Christ so lved the church".Then scream at her for not having the coffee in the

right cup,Or the Ministry yells at you to yell at her,but then says they never said it and loves her.

Mindfu@k anyone?

[Twinky]

I do know of cases where a break-up was "engineered" - then one would be banished and the other invited to stay. Then they would try to get the one who remained into another relationship with some other pliant believer.

The banished one probably hadn't (in reality) done a thing wrong except perhaps retain some shred of his or her own ability to think and to challenge TWI on some of its practices (or just ignore some of the practices) - thus showing they weren't fully committed.

If any of 'em had a single skill in the matrimonial counselling area, I'd be amazed. All they did was encourage and endorse dominance/doormat relationships.

[Rejoice]

I do know of cases where a break-up was "engineered" - then one would be banished and the other invited to stay. Then they would try to get the one who remained into another relationship with some other pliant believer.

The banished one probably hadn't (in reality) done a thing wrong except perhaps retain some shred of his or her own ability to think and to challenge TWI on some of its practices (or just ignore some of the practices) - thus showing they weren't fully committed.

If any of 'em had a single skill in the matrimonial counselling area, I'd be amazed. All they did was encourage and endorse dominance/doormat relationships.

I was in a marriage like that---my spouse moved on to a new "doormat"--LOL!!

[JeffSjo]

My marraige was broke up in just such a fashion.

This thread really hits home for me.

The day they moved my wife and my son out of my house behind my back the thug in charge of my splinter group's property told me that I wasn't welcome back to fellowship until "this shameful situaion is resolved." Meaning, I had to go to them and beg to get my family back.

This particular thug reportedly moved back to Pennsyvania after learning of Barnard's extracirricular activity with the women and I was told he wanted to kill him.

At least the bastard who moved my wife out got a smaaaalll taste of the crap he helped put me through for several years in succession.

(I edited the post to remove a typo.)

Edited April 2, 2010 by JeffSjo

[Bolshevik]

No.

Then they become committed to each other instead of the ministry.

exactly, they do this within couples

between couples

between friends

between parents and children

between whatever

I do know of cases where a break-up was "engineered" - then one would be banished and the other invited to stay. Then they would try to get the one who remained into another relationship with some other pliant believer.

The banished one probably hadn't (in reality) done a thing wrong except perhaps retain some shred of his or her own ability to think and to challenge TWI on some of its practices (or just ignore some of the practices) - thus showing they weren't fully committed.

If any of 'em had a single skill in the matrimonial counselling area, I'd be amazed. All they did was encourage and endorse dominance/doormat relationships.

I believe I've witness this marriage breakup "engineering" . . only the concept I believe is much broader than marriages.

[JeffSjo]

Hmmmph!

Isolate the prey AND teach em' the bible.

What a wicked racket!